


So Selfish It Hurts

by ivycross



Category: Star Trek: Mirror Universe, Star Trek: The Original Series
Genre: Anal Sex, Big Bang Challenge, Blood and Torture, Community: mpregbigbang, Explicit Language, Hand Jobs, Happy Ending, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, M/M, Minor Character Death, Mirror Universe, Miscarriage, Mpreg, Rimming, Semi-Pre-Reform Vulcans, Sexual Assault, Tentacles, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-11
Updated: 2014-03-11
Packaged: 2018-01-15 08:35:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 18
Words: 44,234
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1298389
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ivycross/pseuds/ivycross
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>James T Kirk of the ISS Enterprise is not one to be manipulated by anyone. When his First Officer informs him that he is carrying his child, that is the first thing that enters Kirk's head.  He pushes Spock away and Spock moves on, but will Kirk let him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Cover

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the [2014 Mpreg Big Bang](mpregbigbang.livejournal.com/profile)  
> Art created by [spomarani](spomarani.livejournal.com) All art can be viewed [here](http://spomarani.livejournal.com/13510.html) (Warning: art contains spoilers.)  
> Beta read by [tprillahfiction](archiveofourown.org/users/tprillahfiction) I still mucked around with this, so all mistakes are mine.

 


	2. Chapter 2

A hint of blood lingered in the air, but this was the medical bay. Even when the staff could be bothered to wash it off the walls, the odor remained. Normally it was a beguiling scent but at the moment it was turning Spock’s stomach.

He sat up on the biobed as he reached for his jacket and chewed on his lower lip. The movement caused his goatee to shift around. He held his uniform jacket in one hand peering down at it, before turning his gaze to doctor McCoy, who surprisingly enough had been silent.

“Are you sure?” Spock watched the human's blue eyes narrow at him. He had expected that response, but it never hurt to ask ─ sometimes. McCoy scowled indignantly at Spock and the Vulcan held his stare. Then Spock did something unexpected. He sighed aloud.

“I see,” Spock muttered to himself.

McCoy shook his head. “You know you have options," he said bluntly.

Spock went back to chewing on his lip and thought.  _ Yes, he did, but...  _ “ No,” he answered plainly and his eyes glittered with amusement at the shock on McCoy's face. He shook out his jacket and slipped it on, not bothering right then to fasten the front. Technically, he was off duty, so he wasn't too worried about his appearance. He did fasten the cuffs and brushed away an errant piece of lint.

As he fussed with his appearance, Spock became aware of Dr. McCoy watching him. The doctor crossed his arms over this chest and nodded his head.

“Well if that's the case, we'll need to set up some follow up appointments and start you on some vitamins.”

“ Why Doctor, had no idea you were so nurturing,” Spock said and McCoy snorted.

“I am a fucking doctor, you know. Asshole.” That last bit was muttered under McCoy's breath as he moved to nearby cabinet, pulling out a hypo and cartilage. He walked back over to Spock and with no warning plunged the hypo into the Vulcan’s neck. Spock did not even blink. “That's your first dose. I'll give you some to take with you, so you can administer them yourself. I recommend taking them in the morning and make sure you eat something with you take them. In fact when you leave here, I want you have a snack of some kind.”

Spock blinked and frowned. "Thank you, Doctor, but right now I do not think I could really handle food on my stomach." That made McCoy huff with annoyance as he trekked back to the cabinet. He set the hypo with other cartilage and once again jabbed Spock with it.

“There, the dramamine should take care of the nausea. Now go eat something, before you get on my nerves.”

Spock arched an eyebrow and tilted his head to one side. "I take it is time for your smoke break?" He asked innocently enough, but McCoy's face turned beet red.

“Out,” the doctor ordered and there was the tiniest up turn to Spock mouth. It was gone in a second, but it was there long enough that Spock was sure McCoy would start to fume.

“Very well. Thank you for your time, Doctor. I will return to my quarters now and as you requested, 'have a snack.' Good day.” Spock turned towards the door making sure that McCoy caught the tiny smirk on his face before he left.

He should not have pushed though as he heard from behind him, “So, are you going to tell him?”

When Spock turned around to look at McCoy, the man looked like he had just won a grand prize, but only for a second. He must have seen something in Spock's face that wiped the triumphant smirk from his lips.

“I will have to, won't I?” Spock said, weakly. He looked down and run a hand over his midsection as he continued to speak.

“He will find out eventually.”

~*~

_ Beep, beep, beep, beep. _

“Will you shut that fucking thing off? It's been beeping non-stop for the past hour!”

Spock crawled out from the access tube and raised one eyebrow at Mr. Scott. He watched as the man cleared his throat and looked away. He continued to study the chief engineer for a moment longer before turning his attention to the data PADD next to the bulkhead. Leaning over he picked up the PADD and unlocked it to check his messages.

He found his inbox overflowing with messages from the captain:

_ Spock, let's have lunch and maybe fuck after? -Capk _

_ Spock? Did you not get my last message? Wtf?-Capk _

_ Sppooooccckkk!- Capk _

_ Okay, so a no on lunch. Fine. fuck you, you pointed eared half breed. You're a shitty lay anyhow- Capk _

_ Ok you're not a shitty lay, but for fucks sake, Spock. I'm bored and backed up. Are you pissed at me? -Capk  _

_ Spock?-Capk _

_ Spock?!?-Capk _

_ I hate you! -Capk _

Spock closed his eyes, took a deep breath then sighed.

Over his shoulder, Mr. Scott read the messages and snickered. "What's the matter, lad? Trouble in paradise?"

Spock waited and counted to ten. Over the course of the last few weeks he noticed that his controls were slipping and he did not want a dressing down for killing the Scotsman. Once he was sure that he could speak without snapping the other man's neck, he locked his PADD, unfastened his jacket and shoved the device inside a pocket he had sewn in just for that purpose. As he re-hooked the front of his uniform he turned to Mr. Scott and gave him a lofty stare. He was given the satisfaction of watching the human take a step back.

“I believe, Mr. Scott, that is none of your concern. Please excuse me.” Spock walked away before the chief engineer could say another word. As he departed he counted his breaths trying to fight off the headache that was forming behind his eyes.

He had just decided to locate the captain and make a feeble attempt at a civilized conversation, when something latched on to his arm and pulled him into a nearby alcove. He found himself pressed into the wall and surprised to feel warm lips press to his slightly cooler ones. He shut his eyes and sighed as he melted into the kiss which tasted like coffee and brandy.

When the kissed ended, Spock slowly opened his eyes and peered into the gold-green gaze of his Captain.

He observed as the human smirked at him, obliviously responding his own dazed expression. "Miss me?" Kirk whispered as he leaned back in for another kiss. Spock, hating himself for it, ducked out his captain's grasp and stood back several feet from the human. Dumbfounded, Kirk glared and Spock watched the color rise on his face. "Is there a problem, Mr. Spock?" Kirk growled.

Spock shook his head. "No problem, Captain.”

The color drained away from Kirk's face as he stood there confused. Spock shifted his weight and made to move around Kirk, but the human shot out an arm, blocking Spock's path. "Alright, I give. What imagined slight are you punishing me for?" Kirk's tone was almost merry and he smiled, but it was cold and brittle looking.

“I am not punishing you for anything, Sir. I am currently occupied with something and I must return to my duties,” Spock intoned.

“Bullshit,” Kirk answered back and Spock cocked an eyebrow at that, but said nothing. The two held one another's stare for a minute before Kirk broke. He dropped his arm and taking a step back, heaving out a sigh.

“You know, Spock, there was a time you would drop everything to have lunch with me, but it seems lately you can't even be bothered to talk to me on professional level. So, I’m going to ask you one more time. Is there a fucking problem here?”

"One more time, Captain, there is not."

Kirk was still for a moment, with the only exception being the muscles around his jaw moving. He looked down at his boots and when he looked back up something in his face changed. "Spock," he started his tone softer, "look, I know that I’m being a little... snappish, but it's been two weeks and I miss you." Kirk finished by giving Spock a warm smile.

The Vulcan felt his resolve fading.  _ You didn't think you could avoid him forever did you? _

“James,” Spock said with a sigh. He saw his captain's face light up at the sound of his name. “Forgive me. I have had a lot to do lately and even more on my mind, but it would seem that I have been ignoring you. Will you accept my apology?” Spock watched as Kirk strode up to him and wrap his arms around his waist.

“I’ve got one better,” Kirk said, speaking directly into Spock's ear and the Vulcan shivered as the warm air blew over his skin, “why don't we have dinner in my quarters and then we can make it up to each other afterwords.”

Spock pulled back just enough to look into his captain's face. Kirk's expression was inviting but those shrewd and calculating eyes betrayed him. Sometimes it was hard for Spock to decide which part of James Kirk he was more attracted to, the part that whispered sweet nothings in his ears or the part that watched him like a hawk. Those hazel eyes darted around searching Spock’s face. Obviously the captain was waiting for an answer.

_ I shall get this over with and tell him tonight. _

“I find that agreeable,” Spock told him. “When would you like me to come by?”

Kirk smiled, in an almost genuine gesture. “Twenty hundred hours sounds good. Wear something nice for me, k?" Kirk gave Spock one last kiss and was gone, leaving him alone in the alcove.

Spock frowned at the spot where kirk had stood.  _ Wear something nice, indeed... _

Shrugging, Spock stepped out into the main corridor and made his way back to where he had left Mr. Scott. He found the human hanging out of the access tube upside down, look slightly crispy.

“A little help?” Mr. Scott asked. Spock reached out and with some care pull the other man out of the tube and helped him on the ground. Mr. Scott blew a breath and tried to smooth his hair back.

“May I inquire as to what happened?”

“No, ye may not and between us nothing happened, alright?”

Spock gave an understanding nod before once again departing the scene, leaving the chief engineer to make his own way to sick bay. He decided that he should return to his own quarters and rest before his meal with the captain. As he walked to the turbolift there was a flurry of activity as members of engineering tried to figure out what caused a power surge on deck four and did anyone know where Mr. Scott was.

Spock managed to avoid answering any questions presented to him until he retreated to the relative safety of the turbolift. At least this would give him and captain something talk about over dinner tonight, he thought.

Or rather, something he would prefer to discuss.

 


	3. Chapter 3

Spock pushed the food around his plate with his fork. He had made the effort to enjoy his meal, but everything made his stomach roil just by looking at it. So, Spock took tiny bites and tried to make conversation.

About half away through dinner Kirk seemed to noticed that Spock was not eating and started glowering at the Vulcan from across the small table. Upon seeing his captain's displeased expression, Spock heaved out a sigh, set down his fork and gently placed his hand his lap. Kirk leaned back in his chair and crossed his legs, his expression not changing.

“Dinner was exceptional, James. Thank you,” Spock said, trying to warm the chilly atmosphere. Usually stroking his captain's ego did the trick, but across from him, Kirk just tipped his head to one side.

“Was it Spock? Are you sure? I mean you ate so very little of it, how would you know?” Kirk's tone sounded hostile.

Spock licked his lips and cleared his throat. "My apologies. I did not mean to cause offense, but I have not been feeling well lately."

Across the table Kirk uncrossed his legs and sat up, concern marring his face to Spock's surprise.

“Not well? What the hell is wrong with you?” Kirk demanded.

Spock exhaled through his nose slowly. He was not ready for this, but it was far too late for that. "Nothing, but there is something that I need to discuss with you." Spock watched as Kirk frowned and raised an eyebrow.

“What would that be, Mr. Spock?” Kirk's voice had turned from concern to suspicion. Spock often wondered what it was like for his captain to be able to run from one emotion to another so effortlessly.

“It is nothing to be overly concerned about, but I feel it is something that you need to be aware of--”

“Nothing to be overly concerned with? Well then, let's discuss it later.” Kirk spoke over Spock so quickly that he was stunned into silence. Spock blinked a few times before starting again.

“Well, it is somewhat important and you should be aware of this--” Spock was silenced again when Kirk leaned over the table and pressed two fingers to his lips. In the low light of the cabin Kirk's eyes looked like liquid gold and Spock once again felt his resolve melting away. He really needed to get a handle on that.

“So, dinner wasn't that great and you don't feel good. I’m sorry for that, Spock. How about we go behind the partition and have dessert? I got the galley to make your favorite, honey peach cake.” Kirk smiled and winked. Spock leaned back from his captain's fingers and licked the salt off his lips. His captain was trying so hard and Spock was falling for it.

“With candied pistachios?” Spock asked and Kirk's smile widened as he nodded. Spock started to tell Kirk ‘no’. That they should talk because what he had to say was important and Kirk needed to understand what it would mean for them in the future, but he hesitated. As Spock looked into those gold eyes and took in the smile, he realized that soon everything between them would change. So he made a decision and leaned forward, pressing his lips to that smile.

Kirk hummed as he returned the kiss and next thing Spock knew he was being pulled from the table. He was led behind the privacy screen and pushed down on the bed into a pile of pillows. As he fell into the pile, he inhaled and found them to be scented. Their heady perfume of Jasmine filled his head and left him dizzy. From above him, Kirk knelt down beside him on the bed. Two tanned arms enclosed his head as Kirk's face came closer to Spock's.

Once again their lips met, sliding together effortlessly. Spock closed his eyes and moaned helplessly as Kirk sucked on his lower lip, nibbling it with his teeth. When Spock felt the human’s hot tongue, he parted his lips without hesitation and let out another moan as the tongue darted in, sliding over his teeth and the roof of his mouth as if Kirk owned the space.

Spock's hands moved into Kirk's hair, his fingers entwining in the tawny locks. Now Kirk was moaning with him as their tongues moved around in one another. Spock breathed in and drowned in the scent of his captain mixed with the smell of flowers.

When Kirk's lips left his, Spock whimpered only to be consoled with feather light kisses on his chin, cheek and finally ear. Kirk paused there, breathing hard, the sound of his hot breath driving Spock to madness. When Kirk pulled back to stare down at him, Spock was panting, his face flushed and green.

The grin was back on Kirk's face, which was now pink and he seemed to chuckled at Spock's appearance. He leaned back down touching his forehead to Spock's. "Now that you've had a taste for what I’ve got for later, how about we have dessert?"

Spock huffed, disappointed. At that moment, no amount of cake could satisfy him and his attempt to convey this message to his captain with his eyes fell short. Kirk only laughed as he moved off the bed and over to a small compartment in the wall. He hit a button and a partition slid open. Inside Spock could see one piece of cake, cut into two layers with peaches and yogurt in-between. Honey dripped down the sides and it was topped with candy coated pistachios that glittered in the light.

Kirk picked up the plate and with care carried it back over to the bed. Spock eyed the cake and swallowed his nausea. Sitting beside Spock and taking up the fork that had been resting on the side of plate, Kirk cut off a piece. He held it out to Spock.

“Ahhh," Kirk said. Spock frowned at that and attempted to take the fork from Kirk's hand but his captain leaned back, shaking his head. “Ahhh,” he prompted again and with a resigned sigh, Spock opened his mouth.

With a look of pure glee, Kirk popped the piece of cake into Spock's mouth which turned to lust when Spock's lips closed around the fork. It was pulled out of his mouth and Spock chewed slowly, trying to judge if he would be ill. His stomach made a protest, but for the time being it would seem that he would be alright.

“Good?” Kirk asked, his voice as honeyed as the cake itself.

Spock swallowed and nodded.

Kirk grinned manically, his pupils blow wide. "You wanna another bite?"

Spock took a second to think about this. He could take another bite and risk being sick, however his captain looked so happy. Maybe he could at least feed himself, but once again he looked at Kirk's face. The man was enjoying himself so much and Spock knew what was expected of him in this situation. It was ridiculous and if Spock was so inclined to, he would laugh, but he knew his place. Snuggling deep into the pillows, he fluttered his lashes at his captain and let his lower lip stick out a fraction.

“ Please,” he whispered and was amused as Kirk's eyes widened.  _ Too easy _ , Spock thought to himself as Kirk fed him another forkful of cake. Spock ate carefully, waiting with each bite to make sure that it would not come back up. This seemed only to entice Kirk further and Spock decided to play with his captain some. With each bite he took to licking his lips and with exaggerated care wiping the corners of his mouth with a finger.

By the time the cake was gone, Kirk was vibrating and not bothering to hide his erection. Not that Spock wasn't aroused as well. He was so hard it hurt and he had unfastened his jacket exposing the tight thermal underneath. He shifted on the bed seductively, enjoying the way Kirk’s hungry eyes watched him. "Did you enjoy your dessert, Spock?" Kirk asked, his voice alluring. Spock felt his body respond to the tone and he made a little "hmm" as he moved his hips drawing Kirk's attention to his own erection.

“I did, but what about you, James? Where is your...treat?”

It was like a script, Spock mused. As if on cue Kirk leaned down pinning Spock in place.

“Oh, I’m getting ready to have my treat.” Kirk planted his mouth on to Spock's giving his lips a quick lick before moving to his neck. Spock inclined his head to give Kirk more room and gasped when his captain bit down on his throat. Warm hands grasped him pushing their way under his thermal shirt. They glided along his skin leaving white hot trails of arousal in their wake.

Spock's own hands alternated from pulling on Kirk's glittery bolero to digging fingers into Kirk's shoulders pulling the man closer. Kirk's mouth glided it way up Spock's back up neck and he placed sloppy kisses along his jaw.

Stopping at an ear, he sucked the lobe between his teeth and nibbled on it making Spock whimper softly. Letting go of the ear, Kirk licked along the shell all the way to the point. He then nipped it lightly with his teeth. Spock shut his eyes and bit back a groan.

“Have I told you how fucking magnificent you are?” Kirk breathed into Spock's ear. Opening his eyes, Spock turned his head so he could see his captain's face.

“Not recently, no,” he said evenly. At this Kirk huffed and sat up straddling the Vulcan. He took his dagger out its sheath, and holding it in his teeth he removed his sash and his vest, revealing smooth tanned skin that Spock instinctively reached out to touch. The feel of the hot flesh under his fingertips made him shiver and Spock purred with approval.

From above him, Kirk seemed to watch him. Suddenly, he grasped one of Spock's hands in his own. Spock peered at his captain as Kirk removed his dagger from his mouth, and brought Spock’s hand up to his lips. Spock shivered feeling Kirk's lips graze his knuckles with the lightest of touches.

Spock, surprised by the intimate gesture, stared at his captain not bothering to hide his astonishment. Kirk must have seen Spock's expression as seemed to hesitate before releasing the hand altogether. The moment only lasted a second, before he seemed to collect himself again.

“I haven't?” Kirk asked, returning his attentions back to their previous conversation. As he spoke he ran the flat of his blade over Spock's cheek.

“I am afraid not. “ Spock's dark eyes glittered as he turned his head offering more of his flesh to his captain's blade. Kirk gave a lopsided little grin.

“That, Spock, is sin. No wonder you haven't been coming around. I'll have remedy this at once.” Spock shivered as the knife started to make its way down his neck. It stopped at the hollow of his throat and there was a moan as the point was gently pushed into his skin. When he felt the pressure on his skin lessen, he peered back up at his captain.

"I was not aware that you cared, James.” For a moment, Kirk looked indignant.

“Of course I care." The knife was gone from his neck and Spock watched as Kirk placed it under his shirt. There was rip as it cut through the cloth exposing Spock's lean torso. Kirk's expression was lustily and little wild as he leaned down pushing the knife back into Spock's neck.

“Spock, I adore fucking you,” he said softly, “and I will do anything to keep you coming back to me, so I can keep fucking you.” The blade was moving again, down Spock's chest and he arched his body upward to feel the edge push into him. Kirk smiled and it was such a warm gentle thing that Spock's heart hummed in his side.

Their eyes met and their glazes lingered. Neither moved for several seconds and then Spock writhed, rolling his hips upwards. He let out a sigh and whispered, "James..."

The wild look was back on Kirk's face as he took his dagger and sliced a thin line down line of Spock's sternum. Squeezing his eyes shut, Spock hissed loudly. Kirk seemed to just watch for a brief moment then he lowered his mouth and pressed it to the wound.

Leisurely, he flicked his tongue over the cut, as Spock gasped and moaned. Kirk worried at the wound, mouthing it, licking it, nibbling the surrounding area with his teeth, seemingly taking delight in the way the hair on Spock's chest tickled his skin. He stopped and lifted his face, grinning, a thin ring of green blood around his mouth. Spock watched as his captain's tongue danced over his lips the and ring steadly disappeared. On his chest the cut still bled faintly and it matted in his chest hair along with Kirk's saliva.

“ Anything?” Spock breathed out. There was moment where the their eyes locked again and Spock felt something wholly unfamiliar to him. Hope.  _ Maybe _ , he thought,  _ things would be okay _ .

“Anything,” Kirk rumbled and Spock's heartbeat increased as his captain pressed his blood stained mouth to his. Spock tasted copper and inhaled Kirk's scent. His eyes rolled back and shut. Fingers were in his hair while Kirk's moans and grunts filled his ears.

Spock ran his hands down his captain's back, feeling the taut muscles under the skin. He reached Kirk's buttocks and gave them a hard squeeze. The result was Kirk pressing down hard into Spock. In turn, Spock parted his legs and raised one knee, so that their erections rubbed into each other. They ground into one another for a good minute before Spock jerked away to catch his breath and Kirk nuzzled his cheek.

Panting, Spock held Kirk close to him the hot slick skin of his captain exciting him further. On top of him, Kirk stroked Spock's hair and kissed him repeatedly. Between the kisses Spock heard Kirk mumble, "you ready?"

“Yes,“ Spock sighed and Kirk was off the bed in a flash tearing at the remainder of his clothes. Spock too moved fervently removing his uniform with little care. With his boots, pants jacket, and the torn remains of his thermal gone his hands moved to his black briefs.

“Spock wait.”

Spock paused and turned to his captain who was now standing at the end of the bunk, completely nude. With deliberately slow movements he made his way on to the bed. He knelt between Spock's legs and lower his face down level with Spock's groin.

“Let me,” Kirk whispered. Spock watched as his captain took the waistband of his briefs in his teeth and carefully pulled them down. He moved aching slow and the sight all but pushed Spock over the edge. Especially at one point where Kirk paused and peered up at Spock, his pupils wide, and grinned.

When the briefs  had been slipped past Spock's feet and were now laying in a heap on the floor,  K irk moved one of his fingers around in  a circle. Spock understood and rolled over onto his stomach. He gasped when kirk's hand grasped his hips and jerked them up. Quickly Spock shifted his legs bending his knees.

“Good boy,” Kirk cooed, “now place your hands between your knees.” Spock did so and waited. Kirk's warm rough hands moved over his buttocks and soon Spock felt a sharp sting as one of hands struck a cheek. Spock inhaled sharply, but careful not to make any sound. It seemed this did not meet with approval, as the hand came down again harder. This time Spock gasped and for show let out a whimper. That seemed to do the trick because the hand started to caress him gently.

“You have the cutest little ass.” Kirk's tone was soft and adoring. The sound of it made Spock hum and there was a chuckle from Kirk.

“I just love how it looks,” Kirk breathed. “You know what I love more than that?”

“Tell me,” Spock sighed knowing where his captain was going.

“How it tastes,” Kirk said and Spock felt the soft touch of lips on his cheek. Then came the sharp sting of teeth as they scrapped over his skin making his breath catching his throat. There was another chuckle from Kirk and a warm hand squeezing his ass before his cheeks were pulled apart.

Spock waited and once more again he was aware of the gentle press of lips to his flesh. It was followed by the feel of wetness trailing over his hole. Spock bit his lip and keened as cool air blew over the area.

“Well, aren’t you a good boy,” Kirk sibilated. There was another lick and more air. Spock fought not to push back against Kirk's face, to keep from grinding into it.

“You're all nice and clean for me. I knew you would be. You must have wanted this bad.” This time there more that one lick and Spock moaned as Kirk's lips pressed to his hole and sucked. His cock jerked and he whined silently, feeling his hands resting useless between his legs.

“James, may I touch myself? Please?” Spock tried to ask. The lips pulled away from his body and Kirk gave his cheek a quick lick.

“No. You may touch yourself when I say you can and don't bother asking for permission again.” There was another lick on his cheek and Spock huffed with irritation.

“Don't be like that, Spock. I would hate to ruin this by stopping and finding a cage for that poor weeping cock of yours.”

Spock deflated and fought the urge to huff again. “Yes, James.”

“Good boy,” Kirk said and once more Spock felt Kirk's tongue circling his hole. It moved around his anus, lapping and sucking at it as Spock moaned and purred. There was a push and Spock gave a soft gasp as it entered him. It was gone after only a moment but it left Spock with shaking with need.

The tongue pierced him again and Spock pushed back a hair to force it in deeper. He was left wanting though as Kirk pulled back. Something different pressed against his opening and Spock held his breath.

“I take it you are getting impatient?” Kirk inquired. Spock said nothing as he waited for his captain to make a move. There was more pressure as he felt Kirk slid a finger into him. As it pushed in slowly Spock shuddered and groaned.

“Ah, so that's what we wanted,” Kirk said evenly. He pushed and pulled his finger out of Spock easily. After a minute he added a second finger and Spock shuddered again. As the fingers moved he savored the stretch and burn, rocking his body in time with Kirk's movements.

A third finger was added drawing a sharp gasp from Spock and a chuckle from Kirk.

“Look at this, Spock. You must want it so badly right now, the way you're sucking my fingers in.” He continued to slide his fingers in and out at an agonizingly slow pace as Spock's breathing turned hard and erratic. The fingers curled up inside him, the tips of them brushing against something. As they moved Spock became aware of heat spreading throughout his body. His already aching cock, now throbbed painfully, pre-come dripping down its shaft. A whimper escaped his lips and he squeezed his hands together forcing them to stay in place.

“James...” Spock whined and he winced hearing the need in his voice. This just made his captain laugh as he continued to move his fingers over Spock's prostate.

“Okay Spock,” Kirk hummed. “I think we're ready. What do you think?” As he spoke he pushed all three fingers into Spock's prostate, punching it like a button. The force of it extracted a cry from Spock and he fought not to fall forward into the bed.

Removing his fingers, Kirk shifted over, stretching out beside Spock. Spock turned his head toward him and raised a curious eyebrow. Kirk smiled as his hand reached out to stroke Spock's cheek. “You were a good boy, so I'll let you ride tonight. Sound good?”

Spock's eyes went wide and without hesitation he moved his hands and raised up onto his knees. Eagerly he straddled Kirk positioning himself over the human's erection. Reaching out he leaned over and opened the drawer in the near-by night stand, pulling out a bottle of lube. Squeezing a generous amount in his palm Spock reached behind him, taking Kirk's cock in his hand, enjoying its thickness, as he coated it with the slippery substance, before he carefully lowered himself down on it. Kirk's hands slid up his thighs and clasped his hips. Spock shut his eyes and exhaled slowly. Once his captain’s cock was fully seated inside of him, Spock took a moment to relish in the fullness. He arched his back and moaned as one of Kirk's hands moved from his hip and gilded up his body.

With his own hand, he pressed the fingers to his stomach and sighed, before letting go. Righting himself, Spock opened his eyes and gradually moved his hips, rotating them in a small circle as he watched Kirk’s face set itself in an expression of pure bliss.

The hand on his stomach reached up and stroked his chest, the fingers grazing his nipples before it gilded back down. The tips trailed over his flesh down into his pubic hair and up the shift of his cock. They lingered on the head before moving one, once again digging themselves into his hips and then into his ass.

“Don't tease me Spock.” Kirk pushed his hips up, thrusting more of himself inside Spock's body. “Move. Bounce. Ride that cock for me.”

Leaning forward Spock lifted his ass up a few inches before pushing back down. He repeated the movement, setting a steady pace. He rocked with his eyes hooded and his mouth open as he focused on his breathing.

“That’s good, but you can do more than that,” Kirk said, his gaze stroking Spock's body. A hand came up and caressed Spock's lower lip.

“Let go Spock. Show me what good time you're having. Come on,” Kirk coaxed. Spock leaned back and rocked faster. Kirk’s cock churned inside him. Spock felt hot and needy as he pushed up and slammed back down. Under him Kirk swore and when he moved again, Kirk grabbed hard on his hips pulled him down. Crying out Spock tilted his head back, increasing his speed. Using his thighs he bounced harder, not bothering to hide his pleasure. He knew fully well what the captain wanted. Spock’s duty was to lose himself in the sexual act. Wringing these emotions out of him was Kirk's favorite pleasure, Spock knew, but then it was his too.

“James,” Spock cried out. Kirk hissed at the sound of his name as he took Spock's cock in his hand and pumped it.

“Fuck, Spock. You look so good riding my cock. Does it feel good?”

“Yes, James,” Spock moaned out. He peered down at Kirk's flushed face, grinning up at him. The heat in his lower half flowed up into his chest, into his sides and he felt his heart starting to melt. A sob broke free from his lips. Suddenly he didn't want to wait anymore. His mind shorted out as his need took over. His movements became harder and faster. Somehow Kirk's fist managed to keep up as it stroked him closer to completion.

“James, make me come,” Spock pleaded. The hand on his cock jerked as Kirk's adjusted his pace to accommodate Spock's request.

“Oh fuck yes. I want you come for me. You're so fucking gorgeous when you come for me,” Kirk rambled, tugging Spock's cock at a furious pace. Everything in Spock tensed and tightened as he continued to move, the cock inside him pushing him closer to the edge. He licked his lips, his breath coming too fast. He felt his balls pull up and the moment suddenly seized him.

Giving a strangled cry, his eyes wide, Spock ejaculated. His body stilled as it happened, every muscle rigid. Under him Kirk groaned and swore as his semen pumped inside Spock. The way Kirk's cock twitched inside him made him sigh, he gave one last rock of his hips, the movement slowly and jerky, before leaning forward and collapsing on top of his lover.

Kirk's softening cock fell out of him as he stretched out and he felt Kirk's arms wrap around his still shivering body. He shut his eyes as the sound of the human's heartbeat pounded into his ears. There was an exhalation of air from both men and then silence.

The afterglow was the best part. For a brief moment they could both really forget the rules and who they were. They could just be content to be with each other. Spock rested his head against Kirk's chest. Semen dripped out of his body and cooled as it ran down his thighs, but he didn't want to move. The weight of Kirk's hands on his back told him that his captain didn't want him to move either. It was a shame that his body had other ideas.

He had pushed his stomach too far this night and it decided that this was going to be the perfect moment to take its revenge. His stomach roiled and he knew that he wouldn't be able to swallow it back down. Slapping a hand to his mouth to delay what was coming, Spock leapt out of the bed and scrambled into the fresher. Behind him he heard Kirk swearing, confusion and annoyance modifying his tone.

He just made it to the head as the contents of his stomach made their hasty exit from his body. Dropping to his knees and gripping the bowl Spock retched and choked as he was hit with wave after wave of nausea. After a couple of minutes and a few dry heaves Spock just lay with his head on the seat reveling at how cool it was on his skin.

“The fuck...”

Spock lifted his head and turned his attention to Kirk who stood in the doorway, his face a mask of disgust, suspicion and maybe concern. It was hard to tell. Spock stared up into that face and knew the jig was up. Yes, he had planned to tell Kirk, but now he had no choice

“James,” he started. He read the tension in Kirk's body and his heart dropped. There was no way that his captain would be okay with this.

_ We always knew that, so let's just get this over with.... _

“I am with child.”

 


	4. Chapter 4

Spock sat on the bunk in a robe looking too thin. Kirk stopped pacing and just looked at his first officer. Spock would not meet his gaze. That alone was unsettling, but Spock looked too small sitting there on his bed.

“So you wanna explain me to how this happened?” Kirk started. He began to pace again. Spock's gaze remained on the floor.

“I was unaware that you did not understand basic biology,” he replied. At that Kirk stopped in mid-step. He stood there as he sucked on his lips and balled up his fists.

“I am not in the mood for your little jokes, Spock. You know what I mean.”

“Yes, James, I do understand your meaning. I do not know if you are aware, but Vulcan males are capable of giving birth. It was helpful during the more savage parts of our history when it kept us from going extinct. Of course now it's an inconvenience and a genetic oddity we do not talk about. From an early age young males are tested to see if they are able to bear children and if so are given preventives.”

Kirk crossed his arms, glowering at Spock and waited. When Spock offered nothing else he went for broke. “So what? Did you forget to take your pill this morning?”

Spock shifted on the bed. “Negative. I was never given any preventives, nor did I think would need them. I was never tested as a child because it was assumed that I was infertile.”

“Why would you assume that?”

“Because I am a hybrid, James. My mother was human, so it was logical to assume. I have never giving any thought to it, because I was never interested in such activity before meeting you. I did not know this would happen.”

Kirk chewed on his lower lip and started to pace some more. A thought turned over in his mind and he tired to think that this was not deliberate. How could it be? Spock would never stoop so low. More over Spock wouldn't be so stupid as to think that something like this would work. Kirk stopped and looked back at Spock.

The Vulcan’s head was down again and once again Kirk thought that Spock looked far too small in that robe sitting on his bed. _No, Spock wouldn't..._

“How far along are you?” Spock lifted his eyes and Kirk read so much there.

“Eight weeks,” Spock said quietly. Kirk chewed on his lower lip.

“Eight weeks?” Spock nodded once more and lowered his gaze. That was getting to Kirk. Why was Spock acting this way? Like something was wrong. He shook his head and chuckled. Rising his head, Spock gave him a puzzled look and Kirk grinned out right as he took a seat next to the Vulcan.

“Okay. This is not a big deal. So, stop staring at the floor,” he said.

Spock's eyes grew wide as he blinked at him. “You are alright with this?”

Kirk laughed. “Don't worry. Marlena ran into this a few times. We'll just go see McCoy in the morning. He's got a special cocktail. Just drink it up and forty-eight hours later, no more problem.” He gave Spock a slap on the back and grinned.

“I believe you should know,” Spock said, “I have already seen Doctor McCoy...” Kirk's smile faltered. Spock's posture had not changed and he seemed even more tense than before.

“Okay. Great. What's the issue?” Kirk tried to maintain his cheer, but once more Spock was not meeting his gaze and frankly the Vulcan’s demeanor was grating on his nerves. After a moment of silence Kirk gripped the collar of the robe and pulled closer to him. “Spock! Answer me,” he commanded, his voice low. Now Spock did meet his eyes. They looked determined.

“You are under the impression that I do not want the child,” Spock informed him. “You are mistaken.”

“I see.” Kirk released the robe and stood. His mind kicked into overdrive. The part of him that fought tooth and nail to get his ship stepped forward. “So, what's this actually about Spock? What little plan do you have up your sleeves? What is that you want from me? Hmm?” Spock's eyes followed him as he moved.

“I do not want anything from you,” Spock tried but Kirk bored down on him, grabbing him by the shoulders and shaking him, the captain’s lips curling back in a snarl.

“Bullshit! Now what is it?” Kirk shouted. Spock opened and shut his mouth.

“I just told you ─ I do not...” Spock started before Kirk pushed down on him pinning him down to the bunk.

“Don't lie to me! Now tell me!” Kirk screamed. For a brief moment Spock's eyes went wide with fear before his face became like stone.

“I merely wanted you to know,” he intoned.

Kirk stared hard at him, his lips still pulled back over his teeth. “Why?” he hissed.

“I thought you should know,” Spock replied.

Kirk studied Spock's face then slowly he let Spock up. He stood back from the bed Spock's eyes never leaving him.

“Alright, I know... And?”

“That is all, Captain.”

Captain... Spock was being formal. He must be well and truly pissed off. Kirk gave a mirthless laugh.

“Well, lemme me just tell you one thing. If you think for one moment that I’m giving you a thing because you got knocked up, you're dead wrong.”

“That is absolutely fine. I do not wish anything from you.”

“I’m sure,” Kirk said, rolling his eyes. He expected Spock to argue with him some more on this, but Spock simply stood and started getting dressed. “What are you doing?”

Spock stopped as he slipped his jacket on. “I am preparing to leave and return my quarters. You seemed surprised by this,” he said. Kirk blinked at Spock's tone, but then shook it off.

Kirk noted Spock’s stare was unwavering, which for a moment, made him uncomfortable. “I am not,” the captain replied. “I just thought you would try to sweet-talk me about this.”

“Sweet-talk? I assure you that is the furthermost thing from my mind at the moment and my only real desire is to leave as quickly as possible. Good night, Captain.”

“I didn’t say you could leave,” Kirk replied.

With one raised eyebrow Spock gave his captain a withering look, that should have killed Kirk on the spot, and left.

Kirk stood there and for one moment he thought to go after Spock, but he refused. He was the captain. He was the one in charge here and if Spock thought any different ─ well too bad for him.

Kirk grunted and went into the fresher to bathe.

~*~

The next morning Spock acted like nothing happened. Except, it had. He was very formal, so polite and controlled with every word spoken. Kirk sneered at him at every opportunity. He wanted it plain that he didn't care if Spock's non-feelings had been hurt and he wasn't going to manipulate him to do anything.

Of course later when Kirk needed Spock the Vulcan was nowhere to be found. This set Kirk off like a rocket and he took his wrath out on the nearest person to him, which happened to be Mr. Scott. He only stopped tormenting the man when he remembered that he would need to save some of his anger for Spock himself.

He looked everywhere. He knew that Spock had little spots that he would vanish to, when he wanted to be alone and do "Vulcan stuff", but Kirk knew them all and even they were empty of Spock's presence. After several hours, tired and enraged to the point where he was seeing red, Kirk staggered into the sick bay.

“Well, look what the cat dragged in,” McCoy drawled, setting eyes on Kirk. He came around a corner wiping blood off his hands. Kirk took this in.

“Successful operation, Doctor?”

McCoy looked down at the bloody rag and then back at Kirk. "No, but now we have fresh kidneys on hand."

Kirk smirked and snorted. "Not total loss then," he quipped. McCoy beamed tossing the rag to one side. He moved around Kirk to his desk and pulled out a bottle of something brown. He set out two glasses and fill them both offering one to Kirk. He took it in his hand holding it gingerly and gave McCoy a look. "You don't drink during the day. What gives?"

Sipping from his glass, McCoy offered Kirk a smile. "I wanted you stay for bit. Put yer feet up, relax..." Now Kirk was peering at the physician with suspicion all over this face. McCoy took another drink. "Relax dammit. I ain’t gonna do anything to you. I just wanted to talk, that's all.”

Kirk took note of the doctor’s rather soothing tone. He really was leery then. He set his drink down and took a step back out of arms reach. "Alright. What is it you want to talk about?"

McCoy finished off what was in his glass and shook his head. "Tell me, have you spoken to Spock recently?"

Kirk relaxed letting all the tension in his body go. "Yes and I know all about his problem.” He circled around the doctor.

McCoy’s gaze followed Kirk as he moved. "Oh, so he's already told you that we have to take him to Vulcan?"

Kirk stopped dead in his tracks and slowly turned around.

“What?” McCoy asked, grinning. “I’ll take that as a no," he added as Kirk approached him.

Kirk glared at the doctor, his hazel eyes hard. "No one said anything to me about going to Vulcan.”

That is because, Captain, I have not had time to inform you yet.”

Kirk turned around to see Spock, coming out of the resting area, yawning and stretching, with his jacket over one shoulder. His face was slack and his hair slightly a mess. It looked as though...

“Have you been hiding in here asleep?” Kirk snarled as he spoke. He turned from Spock to McCoy and back again.

McCoy patted Kirk on the shoulder and smiled. "I’ll take this one, Spock. Why don’t you freshen up a bit."

Spock mumbled out, “thank you, Doctor,” while he shuffled off towards the fresher.

Kirk seethed as he watched him go then turned on McCoy. "What the hell is going on? I've been looking for that stupid Vulcan for hours and he's been here, sleeping!"

“There, there Captain,” McCoy cooed as he handed Kirk his glass. “Let me explain, okay? Now sit and have a drink.” He gestured to nearby chair. Kirk took a seat, his face red with rage. McCoy refilled his glass, took a sip and sat down behind his desk. Reaching down he opened a desk drawer and pulled out a square metal case and small silver light. He paid no attention to Kirk, who wrinkled his nose in disgust, as he opened the case, removed a slim cigarette, placed it between his lips and lit it.

He took a long drag off it, exhaling the smoke out his nose before he resumed talking. "Now then, so you already know that Spock's pregnant so we'll won't bother with that bit. We'll start with why you couldn't find him earlier. First off he contacted his father. You know how Vulcans are. Very clan orientated. Well, it would seem that papa blew his top, as much as a Vulcan can blow their top, and he is now demanding that Spock come home. Spock told me there's more to it, but he wouldn't say."

“Why not?” Kirk asked.

McCoy stopped to think on this, taking another drink. He shrugged his shoulders and waved his hand in the hand weaving trails of smoke in the air. "Don't know, but I think he'll tell you before the day is over."

“Why me?”

McCoy grinned at that, his blue eyes glittering. "That I’ll let you figure out for yourself." Kirk opened his mouth to say something but McCoy held up a hand. "Please let me finish. Then you can talk to Spock all you want. Now after his talk with daddy, he had lunch where he ran into me. He looked like hell, so I told him to get some rest. He refused at first, listing off everything little thing that needed to be done on the ship, but I wore him down and offered to let him rest here, where he would be under the guard of my orderlies and no one would bother him. As soon as his head hit the pillow he was out like a light."

McCoy took another pull off the cigarette and waited.

Kirk looked down at his drink and licked his lips. "None of that explains why he was sleeping on the job."

“Sure it does,” McCoy said, his tone chipper. “He's pregnant and for these next several weeks he's going to be tired, a lot. And it looks like he's gonna have some trouble keeping his food down, so I expect he'll lose a few pounds, as if he needs it, and that's going to add to his exhaustion. I'm putting him on light duty until we reach Vulcan.”

“We're not going to Vulcan,” Kirk snapped.

McCoy gave him a searching look, blowing more smoke out his nose “Oh really, Captain?”

“Yes, really. Spock's isn't going on light duty and if I find out about him sleeping during his shift again I’ll have you both thrown into the agony booth.”

McCoy pursed his lip and blinked. "I see. I hate to burst your bubble, but one, it doesn't matter if Spock's goes on this ship or another. He's heading to Vulcan. Two, you cannot tell me who I can or cannot put on light duty. If you presume to do so again I will have you declared unfit for command. Third, You can throw me in the booth, but by law if you lay one hand on Spock in his current condition you will be executed. Remember our last Caesar, the one who lost his lover because she was placed in a combat zone despite her CO knowing full well that she was with child. He had laws put on the books in her name, so that something like that would never happen again."

Kirk crossed his arms over his gold vest and shrugged. "Yeah, but he's not the Caesar any more. He was overthrown."

McCoy nodded. "Yes, but the laws are still there. They haven't been repealed, so go ahead and lay one hand on Spock. See what happens."

Kirk gaped at McCoy. "Since when you care about Spock?"

McCoy shrugged, his cigarette raised to his lips. He pulled his hand away and said: "Since when do you care that I care? I'm just looking out for Spock here because I know you won't. Besides, it seems to be pissing you off and I’m all about pissing you off." He gave Kirk a manic grin once again lifting the cigarette to his lips.

Kirk sat in the chair and shook with rage. He looked down into his glass again and swallowed its contents. Wiping his mouth on this back of his hand he glared at McCoy. "Fine. You do what you want. Spock too. I want nothing in it. Do you hear me?" He stood and pointed a finger at McCoy. The doctor just started at it and then into Kirk's face.

“Fine with me,” he said.

“Good.” With that Kirk slammed down the glass on the desk and stormed out of sick back and back into the hall. As he walked he muttered and cursed to himself, snarling at anyone that walked to close to him. A hapless ensign bumped into him by accident and was knocked unconscious for his trouble.

Kirk soon found himself in his quarters. With the door shut behind him he took his dagger in hand, throwing it at the bulkhead. It stuck and vibrated for a few seconds. This was not his day.

“Captain?” Kirk spun round to see Spock slowly walking into the room. He had forgotten about the conjoined fresher and kicked himself for not locking the door from his side.

“What do you want?” He growled as he turned away from Spock.

“I just wanted to speak to you,” Spock said in his usual mono-tone.

“What makes you think I want to talk at all, let alone to you.”

“If you do not wish to speak that is fine. I will say what I have to say and then leave, but I would prefer that we do face one another. It's only polite.”

Kirk turned around again a condescending sneer on his face. "Oh yes. We wouldn't want to be rude, would we?" He looked at Spock and saw that the Vulcan looked more like his usual self. His hair had been fixed and his jacket was on and buttoned with his hand clasped behind his back. Kirk dropped the snarl and sighed. "I have to take you to Vulcan? Why?"

“I would prefer if you took me, though if you could at least drop me off at the nearest port I will make arrangements from there. As to why...” Spock stopped and worried at his lower lips for a moment.

“It is so I can be married,” Spock said after a few seconds.

Kirk's heart jumped into his throat. "Married? To who?" he shouted.

Spock gave a shake his head. "I do not know. Someone that my father will pick out for me. Probably one of my cousins. I am not looking forward to it, but such is life."

“But, why?” Kirk asked again.

There was no mistaking the bitterness in Spock’s voice as he said: “In my current state I am a blight on my clan, but if they can quickly marry me off then everything will be fine.”

“Blight? What? Because you pregnant?”

Spock nodded.

"That's the dumbest fucking thing I’ve heard of. Your family does know what century this is, right? I mean it's not like we live in some archaic dark ages." For a moment a smile crossed Spock's face and without thought, Kirk grinned back at him.

"They are well aware what century we live in and really it would not matter,” Spock told him, “however, I am with child and it is unseemly to be in my condition without at least a preliminary engagement bond in place."

When Kirk raised an eyebrow Spock added, "to be pregnant without a mate shows lack of control. Add to that I am half human and what most of my people think of me based on that alone..."

"As far as they are concerned you're a dirty little street whore," Kirk supplied.

Once again Spock smiled for a second before his face resumed its usual placid mask. Kirk sighed. He didn't want anything to do with any of this. He just wanted things like they were, but it would seem that unless he wanted an uphill struggle, he would have to play his part until the end.

"Fine,” Kirk said. “I'll take you to Vulcan. Then what?"

"I wed and make the arrangements with my spouse to return to the ship."

Kirk nodded. "Fine. Now about this light duty nonsense..." Kirk trailed off when he saw the look on Spock's face. The Vulcan looked exhausted and his shoulders slumped slightly. "...just tell someone where you're taking your nap so I can fucking find you if I need you for something. I will not have a repeat of today, have I made myself clear?"

Spock brightened and Kirk couldn't help but flash him another smile.

"Thank you, Captain," Spock said warmly. The tone made Kirk a little light headed.

“Yeah, yeah..." He scrubbed his face with his hands as he peered at his first officer.

_Just put up with it until he's married and this is done...._

“Did you need anything else, Spock?” Kirk asked. Spock frowned and shook his head. “Good. Go to your rooms and rest. I'll see you on the bridge in the morning,” Kirk said gruffly with Spock giving him a curt nod. With a muttered goodnight Spock left Kirk alone with his thoughts.


	5. Chapter 5

The light overhead swung carelessly in the darkened cell. At the moment it only had one occupant, a battered and bruised lieutenant strapped to a chair. His head hung down, chin resting on his chest as he coughed wildly, blood dribbling out his mouth as he did. He looked up at the sudden sound of footsteps, his good eye wide with fear.

Captain Kirk squatted down in front of him, his hazel eyes unreadable as he peered into the lieutenant's face. “Hello Quinn,” he breathed.

Lieutenant Quinn at once broke out into tears. “Captain,” he sobbed out. “Please. I don't know what I did, but please let me go. I'm sorry for whatever it was. Please, untie me. Please.”

Kirk watched Quinn, disgusted at the man's pitiful pleas. He pursed his lips, shaking his head.

“Quinn, I am really disappointed in you right now. Crying like a child, begging me to let you go, when you know damned well why you're here.”

Quinn stopped crying. “I do?” he asked.

Kirk stood and began walking a slow circle around his prisoner. “Do not play dumb, Lieutenant. I hate that.” He came around facing Quinn again and peered into the man's one eye. “I know about you and Mr. Spock. I would congratulate you, but you were careless and got caught.”

Quinn tried to move back from Kirk as his captain leaned in closer to him, pulling against his bonds.

“Oh god,” he whispered. “Look. Mr. Spock approached me and I had heard you two were over, so I figured why not you know? Mr. Spock's pretty high on the chain and not a bad looking guy. I thought get my feet in under the table and make the big guy feel good, he would cut me some slack. I'm just a lab assistant, but I got this project I'm working on and with Mr. Spock to indorse it I could really go places. I swear he told me you two had broke things off between you, and that he was in the market for someone else. We only just started fucking too. Like not more than a week or so ago...”

“SHUT UP!” Kirk shouted. Quinn closed his mouth with a whimper and Kirk watched as he shook, tears rolling down his beaten face. “You expect me to believe that horseshit? Lieutenant, I may be a lot of things but I am not gullible. I know what really happened. You and Spock get this idea in your little heads to fuck me over so you knock him up. Then he comes to me, saying that it's mine, and I was supposed to just roll over and believe him. You two leech off of me and god knows what else. Later, after you fucks have sucked me dry, I find out the little rat isn't even mine to begin with, am I right?”

Quinn's expression went quizzical. “What? I don't know what you're talking about Captain. I swear I was just trying to get on Mr. Spock's good side, so he would give me a hand up. I don't know anything about him being pregnant. Like I said we only just started fucking each other.”

Something in Quinn's tone made Kirk pause and take a step back. “You didn't know that Spock was pregnant, at all?”

Quinn shook his head vigorously. “No. I knew nothing about that,” he affirmed and Kirk stared hard at him.

“I see,” Kirk said. His tone was soft and thoughtful. Then pulling his dagger he cut Quinn's throat. He stared at Quinn's now lifeless form as the head flopped forward, blood soaking into the already soiled blue tunic. Pulling his communicator from his belt he started to exit the room.

“Kirk to security. I need a cleanup crew in cell three. Kirk out.”

~*~

“What did you do?”

Kirk looked up from the report he was reading as Spock stormed through his door. The Vulcan looked as calm as ever, but his voice gave him away. It was too tense and clipped sounding.

Kirk set his PADD aside and sat back in his chair. “You care to elaborate, Mr. Spock?”

Spock walked up the desk and leaned over it. “It has come to my attention that my assistant, Lieutenant Quinn, has been 'removed' from the duty roster. When I looked into the matter I found that the order came from you directly. I want to know why?” Spock peered down at Kirk, his eyes bright and glassy.

Kirk smirked. “What's the matter, Spock? Mad that I got rid of your fuck buddy?”

Suddenly Spock straightened up and his face went pale. “I am afraid I do not understand--”

“Yes, you do,” Kirk said smiling. He stood from his chair and moved around his desk stopping right in front of Spock. He studied Spock's face for moment before turning away. “You've been sleeping with him and while I couldn't care less about that, you got careless. He was planning to assassinate you and take over as science officer.”

Spock's ear were turning a deep green as he stared in disbelief. “He would never--”

“I heard him, Spock!” Kirk shouted turning to face Spock once more. “I caught the two of you in the labs one night. Afterwords, I followed him and overheard him talking to some of his buddies. He bragged about how he had you eating out his hand and how he was going enjoy disemboweling you. I sat him down for a little 'chat'.”

“You tortured him, you mean,” Spock interjected. Kirk just gave a brief smile.

“We 'talked' and he told me all about you two and the things you would do together. He also confessed that what he was planning to do the next time the two of you hook up in the labs.”

Kirk stood and waited for Spock say something. The first officer stood in silence, his eyes dark as he studied his boots.

“You are lying,” Spock said, looking up into Kirk's eyes again.

Kirk shook his head, his expression grave. “Afraid not, but if you want confirmation you can talk to Dr. McCoy. He was there to serve as a witness and he will tell you that I'm speaking the truth.”

“Very well,” Spock said after a minute. He stormed past Kirk exiting the cabin as quickly as he entered. Kirk just gave a shake of his head and returned to his desk to finish his work.

Twenty minutes later McCoy strolled in, stopping off first to help himself to a measure of brandy and then taking a seat in front of Kirk's desk. Kirk only looked up from his PADD as McCoy sat down before him.

“Please have seat and make yourself at home,” Kirk quipped.

McCoy took a slip from his glass and sat back in the chair crossing his legs. “Thank you Captain. Mighty kind of ya,” he said with no trace of irony in his voice.

Kirk blew out a breath and set aside his PADD. “Well?” he asked.

The doctor's blues eyes met Kirk’s. “I just wanted to stop by and say hi. Let you know I had a talk with Spock about Lieutenant Quinn. That's all,” he said with a smile.

Licking his lips, Kirk leaned forward resting his arms on his desk. “What did you tell him?”

McCoy shifted in his seat as he uncrossed his leg and then recrossed them. “I didn't tell him anything so much as I just confirmed what he told me you had said. He's pretty upset with you right now.”

Kirk sat back and stared at the ceiling. “He should be thanking me.”

McCoy appeared thoughtful at that. “You think so?”

Kirk frowned. “Yes, I do.”

McCoy said nothing else but gave Kirk as appraising look as he finished off the remainder of his drink. Setting the glass down he from stood and headed toward the door. Kirk stood up and went after him. He caught McCoy by the shoulder, spun him around to face him and hissed: “You have something on your mind, Doctor?”

McCoy peered at his captain his expression inscrutable. “Let's just say I don't care for you lying to Spock.”

Releasing his hold on the doctor Kirk took a step back. “Well, Doctor. If you had done your job, none of this would have happened.”

McCoy pulled himself up to his full height his eyes burning with indignation, “Done my job? I will have you know that my job is to see to my patient and ensure their good health--”

“Come off it,” Kirk roared. “You're a hack that poisons people for fun. You cut your patients open and leave them bleed out on your fucking table while you take your smoke breaks. Now all of a sudden you want be mister-goddamn-nice-guy and play the good doctor with Spock and let him keep his baby!” That last past Kirk altered his tone making it high-pitched and nasally, obviously mocking the man in front of him.

McCoy stood perfectly still as Kirk berated him not even blinking. “What did you want me to do?” he asked after he was sure Kirk was finished. “Throw him up on the table, force he feet in the stirrups and dig in with a spatula?”

“You never had any problems before,” Kirk screamed.

McCoy narrowed his eyes, crossing his arms over this chest. “Before what?” he asked.

“Before with Marlena,” Kirk answered. He peered at McCoy. “You never had a problem with her and yet you want to coddle Spock.”

McCoy raised an eyebrow, taking a step back.

“Marlena never wanted children,” McCoy said. “She would come in my office. We would confirm she was pregnant, I would ask if she wanted it and she always said no. Then I would do my job. Now with Spock wanting his baby, I did my job again, just differently this time.”

Kirk scrubbed his face with his hands and McCoy pulled a slim, square metallic case from his pocket. Kirk watched as the doctor held out a cigarette.

“You want one?” McCoy offered.

“No. I would appreciate it you refrained from lighting up here. I hate the smell,” Kirk said. McCoy shrugged and put them back in his pocket.

Kirk tuned from him again and sighed. “I should have you thrown in the booth.”

“Would it make you feel better?” McCoy asked, sounding sarcastic.

Kirk turn his head and glowered. “Maybe,” he said, but didn't mean it. He moved back to his desk and sat down heavily. Sucking on his lips Kirk let out a frustrated sigh as McCoy walked over to him.

“Leave Spock be,” the doctor said. “He did what he thought what right by him.” When Kirk didn't say anything McCoy added: “Just don't be a dick and lie to him.”

“I make no promises,” Kirk answered. “I will do what is necessary to run my ship. If Spock gets in the way, then too bad.”

McCoy let out a graceless snort. “Fine. “ he said. “I will be going now. Good night.” Kirk did not watch him got but picked up his PADD. He started at it but he couldn't focus on the words. Spock had done the right thing? What did McCoy know? AS far as Kirk concerned this was all some kind of joke being played on him and he didn't care for it. He set down the PADD and walked over to the brandy and poured himself a drink.

The memory of Lieutenant Quinn filled his head and Kirk cursed. What a waste, but what was done, was done. As long as Spock never found out, it would be alright.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is a little long but there was a lot I wanted to cover here.

The volume in the Mess Hall actually lowered as Kirk strode in, his gold sash flapping in the air behind him as he moved through the tables. As he passed, crew would lower their eyes to advert his gaze. This was a source of pride for the him, but today his attention was already taken by a figure sitting at a far table by himself.

Spock didn't even bother to look up from his data PADD as Kirk took the seat across from him. He just sat serenely holding the PADD with one hand while the other lifted an apple slice on a fork to his lips. Kirk watched his First Officer's behavior for a moment before he blatantly cleared his throat to get Spock's attention.

“Yes, Captain?” Spock intoned without moving his eyes. He pierced another slice from the plate in front of him and bit into it. Kirk watched as juice ran from the corner of his lips and into his goatee. He suddenly found himself very distracted and continued to stare transfixed as Spock gently set down his fork and lifted a cloth napkin to his face.

“Is there something I can do for you, Captain?” The sound of Spock's voice broke Kirk from his thoughts of green tinted lips wrapping around bits of him that were pink. He had loved the way the colors contrasted and now...

He shook himself and ignored the faint susurration filling the room. He knew that they were being watched, low ranking crew looking for a weakness, their next step up the ladder. He turned to the table nearest them and let out a low growl that made the people there jump. He watched them scurry away to farther table. Satisfied, Kirk turned his attention back to Spock. The Vulcan's dark eyes bore into him.

“Yes, Mr. Spock, there is something I want,” he answered, feeling smug that he had overridden his initial reaction to those eyes, which was to lean over the table and demand Spock join him in his quarters.

Spock tipped his head to one side and lifted the data PADD back up. “Forgive me, Captain. I am in the middle of one of my scheduled meal breaks and I would prefer to finish in peace.”

Kirk gaped at the Vulcan. Spock always jumped at the chance to do something for him. Kirk had found earlier on in their partnership that Spock had a bit of praise kink and Kirk made good use of that information. After a few well placed, “Excellent work, Mr. Spock” and “Simply amazing Spock,” the Vulcan fell over himself to do anything Kirk asked.

Except now.

“I can see that Spock,” Kirk said. “Since we are one the subject I have noticed that you are scheduled a great number of meal breaks throughout the day and I was thinking--”

“You will need to address this matter with Dr. McCoy,” Spock interrupted.

Kirk sat back, crossing his arms over his chest and frowned. “Why is that?” He was aware of the muscles in his shoulders tightening and the whispering around them getting louder.

Spock picked his fork back up and took a bite, chewing carefully before answering. “The good Doctor believes that my former eating habits are inadequate in providing nourishment for the baby, consequently he has set up multiple meal breaks for me during the day.”

“Ah,” Kirk said rather lamely as he looked around. People were still averting their eyes but there were now cautious smiles on their faces.

Uncrossing his arms, Kirk curled his hand into fists as he turned back to Spock. “If you want to listen that asshole, fine by me. After you're done here I'll stop by your quarters okay?”

Spock gave a nod of his head. “That would be acceptable, Captain.” Spock spoke in a dismissive tone and Kirk bristled at that.

He stood from the table making an annoyed clicking sound with his tongue before giving Spock a phoney smile. “Well then that's all settled,” he said, his tone mockingly polite.

Spock did not look up nor give an answer and Kirk sought for some way to assert his dominance over the Vulcan without using force. His eyes fell on the plate of sliced apples. He reached out a hand and picked up a piece prepared to raise it to his lips in a show of ascendancy.

Suddenly Spock dropped his fork, reached out and struck the back of Kirk’s hand.

Around them the room grew silent and Kirk could feel the sting and hear the echo of the slap ringing in his ears. He peered down at Spock, who stared back at his Captain, one eyebrow raised in challenge.

“Spock,” Kirk said carefully his voice shaking with the effort not to retaliate against the Vulcan.

“Yes, Captain?” Spock replied, his voice smooth and unyielding.

Kirk leaned over the table, slamming his hands against it, his face only inches from the first officer’s. “You have ten seconds to justify that little stunt or so help me...” he hissed.

Without taking his eyes off his captain Spock picked his fork back up and lifted it up to his lips calmly taking another bite of the apple.

“Ten seconds Spock,” Kirk said again while Spock finished the bite in his mouth.

“You are taking food away from my baby,” Spock said quietly.

The statement made Kirk almost take a step back from the table. “What?” he demanded.

“You are taking--”

“I heard you, but I want an explanation as to why that is a sound reason to assault your commanding officer?”

Spock blinked slowly. “Captain, in all the years I have known you, you have always been a greedy and selfish man. I have always allowed you to come and take from me whatever you wanted. There were even times I welcomed it. That is no longer the case. If you take from me, you take from my child and I will not allow that to occur. If you have grievances with my actions then I suggest to you file charges.”

Before Kirk could respond Spock stood from the table and started arranging everything on a nearby tray.

Shaking off the shock, Kirk slammed his fist down on the table again. “What are you doing? We are not done here.” His throat hurt with the effort to not shout.

Spock gave him a very blank look. “Captain, I am tired and as I said before, I would like to finish my meal in peace. I am retreating to my quarters. If there is more you would like to discuss then join me there. I ask that we resume our conversation there, since we would have more privacy.” Spock's eyes look from side to side and Kirk became aware once more that they were being watched. He stood back from the table and gave Spock a condescending smile.

“How right you are, Mr. Spock. I will come by your quarters later, so you enjoy your meal.”

Spock lifted his tray and gave polite nod to his captain. “Thank you Captain.”

The mess hall was silent as Spock calmly walked out. Kirk barely gave him passing glance as Spock moved around the table, but as the Vulcan glided past something caught his eye. It was barely noticeable from the side, so it was no wonder Kirk didn't see it facing his first officer head on. It was a bump just starting curve out under Spock's jacket. The sight of it made Kirk stop and really look at it. It was quick glance but something about made his mouth dry.

As he took his first step there was a giggle. It was a little thing, but something no Captain could afford. Turning toward the sound caught sight of a pale looking crewman, who when Kirk had walked in the dining hall had a number of people around him, but now was completely alone. Kirk looked at him and smirked. “Is there something funny, Ensign Jacobs?”

The man opened his mouth but nothing came out. Kirk closing in on the table, towered over the man. “Don't be like that, Jacobs. If you know a good joke you should share.”

Kirk bored down on the man. It should not have been possible for the crewman to blanch out any more, and yet...

“You know your captain enjoys a good joke.” Kirk's hand moved a like blur and his dagger was suddenly pressed under the ensign’s eye. “Do you know the one about the man with the dagger?” Kirk asked conversationally.

The crewman made a choking noise from the back of his throat as the blade slid through the skin and under his eye. There was no other sound as the hilt of Kirk's dagger hit bone.

“Oh, you know that one? It's a good one, isn't?” Kirk slowly moved the dagger away and stepped back, wiping the blade on his pant leg. The ensign’s eyes rolled back and he slumped in his chair as Kirk strolled out of the mess hall his expression daring anyone to challenge the captain.

Out in the corridor everyone must has heard him in the Mess Hall, because crew skirted around him nervous more so that normal. It was like watching insects scurry about with their fast jerky efforts to move out of his way. All this made the still figure of Dr. McCoy stand out from the rest.

Kirk locked on him instantly. “I take it you want something?”

McCoy grinned as he fell into step with the captain. “Actually I was looking for Spock, but I heard that you found him first,” he drawled.

“I didn't touch him.” The words were out before Kirk could stop them.

McCoy cocked an eyebrow. “Really, now? That's good to know.”

The doctor’s mocking tone and pseudo surprised demeanor made Kirk's teeth ache and his fist itch.

McCoy chuckled at him. “Calm down, Captain. I can tell just by lookin’ at ya, your blood pressure is up.”

“Yeah, well your blood pressure would go up too if your first officer embarrassed you in front of your crew,” Kirk growled.

“Ah,” McCoy said.

They fell into an uneasy silence for a moment as they strode down the corridor.

Then the doctor finally piped up: “Well, Jim, look at things from Spock's point of view.”

Kirk halted. He turned on the doctor his expression a mixture of anger and shock. “Look at it from his point of view?”

“Yes. You have to consider what's it’s like for him right now. I'm sure you noticed that he's starting to show. People are asking questions and he's answering them. All in all he's at risk, because people are seeing him as weak, so he stands up to you, well....”

Kirk peered into McCoy blue eyes, the odor of cigarette smoke rolling off the man. “That's on him then,” Kirk snarled. “No one made him make this choice for him. I suggested that he get rid it, but he didn't want to, so fuck him. He gets what he deserves.”

McCoy stared at Kirk genuinely shocked and opened his mouth to his retort when his communicator went off. Swearing under his breath McCoy pulled it off his belt rolling his eyes as he flipped it open. “McCoy here,” he said keeping his eyes on Kirk, As the captain started to walk around.

From the communicator came the voice of Nurse Chapel. “Doctor, you are needed in Commander Spock's quarters right now.”

Kirk spun on his heels, his eyes fixing on McCoy.

The doctor's brow was knotted. “Why? What the hell is going on?”

“I don't know, but it's been reported that he was attacked,” Chapel said.

Kirk felt his stomach drop. He didn't wait to hear anymore, but turned and ran down the corridor. He yanked two dawdling crew members out of the turbo lift. “Get out of my fucking way!” Inside the lift, he barked, trying not to sound hysterical: “Level five!”

When he arrived at Spock quarters he rushed in the door and stared at the mess before him. There were signs of an obvious struggle. Personal items were scattered all over the floor. By the door was Spock's sliced apple and the broken remains of the plate that held them. Green blood stained the walls and carpet. Yet there was no sign of Spock.

“Spock!” Kirk called out. He waited and when no answer came he took in a breath to call again. He opened his mouth to shout as something black and shiny caught his attention. It was one of Spock's boots, sticking out from behind his desk.

Kirk rushed over and found Spock sprawled face down in a spreading pool of blood. On the desk were streaks of blood trailing down to where Spock lay. Kirk dropped to his knees beside the Vulcan. From outside the room the sound of McCoy swearing could be heard.

“Bones! Get in here now.”

“Goddammit, fucking hell Jim,” McCoy muttered as he entered. He took one look at Spock and pulled out his communicator. “Chapel, get some orderlies over here with an anti-gravity stretcher. We need to get Spock to sickbay.”

“Understood, Doctor.”

McCoy snapped the communicator shut. He then dug in his pocket pulling out his type II medical scanner. It whirled as he waved it over Spock. “Multiple stab wounds to the pectus and abdomen. One lung punctured, but that seems to be the worst of it. As long as he doesn't bleed out on me, that is.” McCoy looked up from Spock to Kirk. “Gets what he deserves, huh Jim?”

Kirk became of aware of heat rising to his face. His stomach roiled but he swallowed down the nausea meeting McCoy's stare. “Shut up.” He looked down at Spock and something inside him screamed.

_ Spock was hurt. _

Kirk's whole body stilled.

_ Spock. Was. Hurt. _

Just then two blue suited orderlies came into the cabin. Kirk stood eying the two men as they made their way toward them and he stepped out of their way. He watched them work for the moment as McCoy barked orders to them and Spock was quickly placed on the stretcher. As the orderlies pushed Spock out of the cabin and as Kirk watched them go. He turned to Dr. McCoy who was still in the room, studying him.

“Shouldn't you be following the orderlies?” he huffed. “Why aren’t you attending to your duties? You do have a patient to tend to.”

Slinging his arms behind his back, McCoy shrugged and stepped closer to Kirk. “Chapel can handle things till I get there. So ─ ‘Get's what he deserves’, Jim?”

Kirk peered at him for a time and then walked out of the room without a word.

McCoy called out in his wake: “I'll see you in Sickbay.”

~*~

He wasn't sure what was worse: The pain or the low droning that was filling his ears. As he shifted, Spock decided it was the pain and he hissed involuntarily. He attempted to open one eye and look around, but everything was just a blur of colors. Shutting his eye again, Spock raised one hand to his face. The droning was getting louder.

Once again he opened his eyes and blinked fiercely as the world around him slowly came into focus. He was in sickbay though he wasn't sure how he had got there. Still blinking he looked around, and was shocked to see Mr. Farrell by his bed.

Spock squinted at him. “Mr. Farrell?” he questioned and the large man peered up at him from the PADD in his hands,

“You're awake? Oh, Let me get the Captain.”

He stood from his chair and was gone around the corner before Spock could say anything else. Alone he could still hear the droning only now it was getting clearer. He realized suddenly that it was actual voices. More specifically those of his captain and Dr. McCoy.

“Finally, now we can get some answers around here, since someone refused to bring him to consciousness!”

“He was resting. That what people do when injured. They rest, not have their psychotic captain harass them.”

The two men came around the corner shouting at one another with Mr. Farrell shaking his head from behind them. Spock just watched, one eyebrow raised quizzically.

“Captain. Doctor,” he intoned. “Would one of you be so good as to tell me why I am here?”

The two men stopped and stared at him.

“You mean you don't know,” McCoy asked. A medical scanner appeared in his hands as if by magic and he started running it over Spock's frame. Spock watched him move shaking his head.

Kirk peered down at him, sucking on the inside of his cheek. “Do you remember anything?” he barked.

Spock started shake his head again, but stopped as a memory surfaced. He sat upright rigid with fear as he was flooded with them. “My baby,” he breathed, his voice edged with horror.

“Is fine,” McCoy supplied.

Spock looked at him uncertainly. “Are you sure?”

“Yes,” McCoy answered, his tone soothing. He stood back from Spock and beamed down at him his face benign. All at once, the tension poured out of Spock's body and he went limp in the bed. Shutting his eyes, he silently said thanks to the universe in general.

“Spock?”

Opening his eye again, Spock looked over at his captain. The man was peering down at him, his expression annoyed.

“What happened? Who did this to you?”

Spock did not meet his captain's eyes but stared upwards. “I would rather not say, Captain.”

“Not an option. Who did this?”

With effort, Spock turned his head to face Kirk, a conflicted expression creeping across his features but still he wouldn’t answer the question.

Kirk gestured with a hand. “Out with it, Spock. That’s an order.”

“It was Senva,” Spock finally said.

“What?” Kirk spat.

McCoy looked horrified. “Your personal guard? Why would he attack you?”

Spock turned back to study the ceiling. “Once again, I would rather not say,” he intoned.

“Once again--not an option,” Kirk growled.

Shame washed over Spock. “When I returned to my quarters, Senva was waiting for me. I was informed he had noticed my increased appetite and I was questioned about my new eating habits so I told him the truth. This disgusted him and he told me as much. He told me that I was shameful and that he could not be my servant any longer.”

“Geez, most people just quit,” McCoy quipped.

Spock shook his head. “No. Quitting was not enough. He felt that it was his duty to my clan to rid them and myself of my shame. He gave me the choice of taking my own life or he would take it for me. We fought and I am afraid to say he got in several hits before I was able to strike back.”

Spock watched as Kirk seemed to freeze in place his expression murderous.

“Captain?” McCoy said cautiously.

“Do you know where Senva is now?” Kirk asked, ignoring the doctor.

Spock shook his head. “I do not know.”

He watched as Kirk turned to his guard. “Mr. Farrell?” he called. The man pulled up behind him directly.

What do you need sir?”

“I need you to form a search party. Mr. Spock's guard Senva has attacked the commander and is on the run. He is somewhere on this ship and I want him found.” At once Kirk grinned down at Spock as he spoke.

“What would you like us to do with him, Captain?”

At this Kirk seemed to think for several seconds. “I want you to take him to the brig. I'll deal with him there.”

Spock met McCoy's gaze. They seemed to be thinking the same thing. There was a pause from Mr. Farrell as well.

“You have your orders, Mr. Farrell. I trust you will carry them out as ordered,” Kirk said.

“I understand my instructions completely, Sir,” Mr. Farrell blurted out hastily.

Kirk beamed at the big man. “Excellent, Mr. Farrell,” he said. He seemed to paused for a moment as he turned to look at Spock. “One more thing, Mr. Farrell. I want you to stay here in sickbay. In fact I want you to stay with Mr. Spock period until I command otherwise.”

Spock cocked an eyebrow at this and McCoy smirked knowingly.

“Understood sir,” Farrell replied.

“Good,” Kirk said. He turned away from Mr. Farrell, who had pulled out a communicator and was barking orders into, and smiled down at Spock. “Well, that's all in order.” he said. “And you are well, or at least sound well.”

“Sound, Captain?”

“Yeah,” Kirk licked his lips and added, “I say sound because under this light you look like shit.” From the corner of his eye Spock saw Mr. Farrell, who had returned to the chair beside his bed, nod silently.

“Ah,” was all that Spock said.

McCoy glared at all of them. “He's perfectly fine, thank you very much. He would better if, one it wasn't for those damned orderlies wanting to cut him open to see what color his kidneys were, and, two, some idiot captain barging into my operating room to kill said orderlies. It's a good thing that Spock here only needed to be stitched up and some blood pumped back into him.”

Spock sucked on his lips avoiding the doctor's glower. He turned to look at Mr. Farrell, who smiled at him and leaned in.

“The best part was the color the doctor’s face turned when he was yelling at everyone to, “get the fuck out right now, or I'm selling all your organs to the Orion black market.”

“I see,” Spock said amused. He heard Kirk chuckle. Looking back at McCoy he saw the man standing there red faced.

“To hell with the lot of y'all,” McCoy mumbled pulling, a half-smoked dog-end from behind his ear. Faster than Spock thought he could move, Mr. Farrell was out of his seat and leaning over the bed. Spock watched as he snatched the butt out McCoy's mouth and tossed it away.

A heavy silence fell over the room.

“Holy shit,” Kirk breathed. McCoy just blinked, unsure of what even happened, while Spock continued to marvel at the speed at which Mr. Farrell moved. It was impressive.

“Sorry Doctor,” Mr. Farrell said. “ But I can't let you smoke around the commander, cause it's not good for the baby.”

Spock sat in awe.  “Thank you, Mr. Farrell.”

“Good work,” Kirk added, giving the big man an authentic smile. He turned to McCoy smirking. “Looks like you're going have to quit.”

McCoy appeared to be of two minds. One of utter shame and the other of insane rage. Spock wondered which of the two would win out. It would seem it was a draw.

“Goddamn fucking hell. Shit damn,” McCoy started to spew as he turned and stormed off towards his officer. Everyone watched him go, though only Kirk was laughing.

“Stupid idiot,” Kirk muttered to himself. He turned back to Spock and Spock gave him what he hoped was a disapproving look.

“Really Captain?” he asked and was surprised to see that Kirk looked slightly abashed. The man seemed to flush and cast his eyes elsewhere.

“Well, he is an idiot,” Kirk muttered. Spock just shook his head and laid back in the bed.

“Sir,” Mr. Farrell said. “Don't you have something for the Commander?”

Spock turned his eyes to Mr. Farrell, who smiled and then back to Kirk who was turning a deeper shade of red.

“Right,” Kirk said and hurried out of the room. He came back with hands behind his back. Spock watched curiously.

“I saw that you never got to finish your snack or what have you and I remember that you said McCoy wants you to have regular meals and I know that everyone in Sickbay gets a sick pleasure letting people sit around hungry, so...” He brought his arm out from behind his back and held out to Spock a large basket of shiny fat apples. Their flesh was pink and golden with tiniest hint of red at their tops. Spock took the basket from Kirk and held it for a long time, studying it, before he looked back at his Captain. He felt heat rising to his cheeks.

“Thank you, Captain,” Spock breathed.

“They're a hybrid that they grow on Omicron Ceti III. Last time we were there I confiscated several crates of them and had them persevered. They're really quite good. Better than the ones from the replicator, which are kinda mealy, you know? If you like those you're welcome to more. Mr. Farrell knows where they are kept in the galley and he has the code get into my storage locker.”

Spock stared at him for the longest time his lips pursed, his brow knotted. Kirk seemed to be waiting for a wave of questions to come, and Spock had a lot of them, but all he could come out with was, “Thank you again, Captain.”

“You're welcome, Spock. Now excuse me, I have to get back the bridge. Mr. Farrell, you are to keep me updated on Senva and Mr. Spock's condition. I am understood?”

Mr. Farrell stood and gave Kirk a salute.

Once Kirk was gone, Spock stared at the basket in his lap. He picked one off the top and turned in over in his hands before holding it out to Mr. Farrell. The big man stared at it before taking it gingerly in his meaty fingers and taking a large bite of it. He chewed slowly and Spock watched as he swallowed.

“Don't tell me you thought the captain would try to poison you?” Mr. Farrell asked. Spock shook his head.

“No, but force of habit. Besides,” he added. “You looked hungry and I do have a whole basket.”

Mr. Farrell gave a nod and took another bite of the apple. Spock took another one out of the basket and regarded it.

“How long have you worked under Captain Kirk?” he asked.

Mr. Farrell swallowed the bite in his mouth and thought. “As long as he has been on the  _ Enterprise _ .”

Spock thought about this and asked: “Do you understand him?”

Mr. Farrell frowned and leaned back in his chair. “That's trick question, sir.” Spock titled his head to one side.

“Is it?” he asked.

Mr. Farrell nodded. “I think so.”

Spock too gave nod of his head. “Then let us forget it.” He stared at the apple in his hands again and then back to Mr. Farrell. “ Since you are going to be a presence in my life, tell me about yourself.”

Mr. Farrell froze, widen eyed, his expression hesitant. “Um, like what?”

“Anything,” Spock answered. This did not seem to help as it appeared that the sizable man was starting to sweat.

“I, um...” Farrell seemed to be at a loss for words, and Spock took pity on him.

“Rumor has it that you are the President of Imperial Gladiators Fan Club aboard the ship and have a continuing correspondence with their top female fighter, Kali.”

Mr. Farrell's round face lit up and he grinned. “Yeah,” he exclaimed. In a matter of seconds Spock was being bombarded with the ins and outs of the world that Mr. Farrell inhabited in his off time. It was rather fascinating, but Spock was only half listening as Mr. Farrell excitedly explained things to him. He was lost in thought as he stared down at the apples in his lap.

~*~

In the booth, Senva, screamed. There was quite a gathering around the booth as word of his punishment got around the ship. Captain Kirk didn't seem to notice the curious mob assembling behind him. With his arms crossed tightly over his chest, he stood dead center in front of the booth and watched the Vulcan inside writhe. Lieutenant Hayworth at the controls studied the Captain's impassive face and shivered.

It was nothing new to see the captain at the booth during operation. He wanted to make sure that it worked correctly and the punishment was carried out, but this time it seemed different, though the Lieutenant couldn't put his finger on why.

“Captain?” he asked trying hard to keep his voice from shaking.

The captain didn't look at him but answered: “What?”

“Did you want the full the duration, sir.”

“Yes.” Kirk didn't even blink. Hayworth nodded and started to fiddled with the knobs on the control panel.

“ Lieutenant?” The Captain called out. Hayworth stopped and peered at his commanding officer.

“Sir?” he answered.

“Can you make him scream louder?” The captain asked.

Hayworth blanched. “Louder, sir?”

“Yes,” the captain said deadpan. “Louder. I want him to scream louder.”

Hayworth swallowed. “Well sir I can see what I can do but honestly...” the words died on his lips as the captain's gaze fell on him. The lieutenant felt his blood run cold and for a moment he wanted to be anywhere else in the galaxy than under that glaze.

“I will see what I can do, sir,” Hayworth said. Captain Kirk turned his attention back to Senva in the booth.

“You do that.”

 


	7. Chapter 7

“Mr. Farrell, please hand me that data PADD.” Spock pointed to the object on the far table and Mr. Farrell fumbled through the jumble of various PADD’s to find the specific one the Vulcan was requesting. Kirk stood in the doorway of the lab and watched them, laughing under his breath at how quickly his guard had been turned into a lab assistant.

Spock looked at and spied Kirk looking in on them. “Captain?” He raised an eyebrow, setting the PADD down and looked expectantly at Kirk. Mr. Farrell stood, giving Kirk a salute.

Kirk waved the guard away and strode up to Spock at the workbench. “I wanted to ensure that you and Mr. Farrell were getting along,” he said, glancing from the guard to the Vulcan.

“Is there some reason that we wouldn't?” Spock asked carefully.

Quickly Kirk shook his head. “No.” he said. “But it never hurts to make sure.” He smiled.

Spock seemed to think this over, his expression as blank as ever. Mr. Farrell seemed to be thinking too, but his face really showed how the thought process what going. Kirk smirked, his eyes cutting toward his guard.

“Since you must know, things are going well,” Spock said finally. “Mr. Farrell is very attentive and he has great foresight. And surprisingly he makes for good conversation.” Mr. Farrell beamed at the compliment and Kirk chuckled. He had never seen his guard look so pleased before. Spock cast an amused look at the large man as he stood up and moved over to a table behind him.

It was then that was able to Kirk take in Spock's attire. 

“What are you wearing?” 

“Ah. You noticed.” Spock stood where he was, placing his arms behind his back. Kirk moved around the table toward him, inspecting Spock up and down, frowning. For the most part the Vulcan’s uniform was the same, but with one difference. The Jacket had been altered, so that it was only buttoned halfway and it flared out at Spock waist. Underneath, Spock's black thermal could be seen, though it wasn't as tight against his body as before.

Taking Spock by the shoulder, Kirk spun him around slowly, his eyes narrowing. When Spock faced him again, the Vulcan seemed ready for a fight, lips drawn in a thin little line. “Before you say anything, Captain, I will have you know that this design was constructed by the quartermaster and approved by the Admiralty.”

“Really?” Kirk said, running his finger over the edge of Spock's jacket. “Which Admiral?”

Spock's eyes looked away for a moment before he answered, “Archer.”

“Ah. The crazy one.”

Spock suddenly turned green and Kirk bit back a laugh as he looked over the jacket again. It didn't look that different. The top portion looked the same as before, with the way the collar was folded. The rank and insignia were in all the right spots. The edges even had the gold trim. So what was the issue?

The issue Kirk realized was that it really did mean that Spock was pregnant. Which was a ridiculous thought. He knew that Spock was pregnant. The whole ship knew.

Thing was Spock had never announced to the ship as a whole that he was pregnant, but it wasn't something that he could hide, so as people asked about his ever growing waistline he just told them the simple truth. Some like Mr. Sulu and Mr. Chekov, laughed seeing this as a sign of weakness. They learned the hard way how wrong they were. Spock had seen to Sulu, lifting the man off the ground and tossing him into a wall circuit after particularly bad day. Chekov had met his fate to Kirk when the captain overheard the Ensign make a rather nasty remark in the mess hall. Sure grinding his face on broken glass might not have been the best way to deal with the situation, but Chekov still had one good eye, and a message was sent out all over the ship: Disrespect the commander and risk the wrath of the captain.

Then there were those that were confused, like Lieutenant Uhura. What would Spock gain from a pregnancy? When she asked him about it, he calmly had rebuffed her: “Please respect my privacy, Lieutenant.”

Mr. Scott on the other hand showed compassion from the get go and suddenly Spock had a full scale nursery. Kirk would never look at the his chief engineer the same way again. He thought about the look on Spock's face when Mr. Scott presented the room to him. It had been priceless.

After while the news was all over the ship and once there, no one cared. Commander Spock was with child, so what? Spock went about his life same as before with some minor differences and everyone else did too. It would seem that one of those minor differences was going to be his uniform and Kirk would have to accept that.

“I like it,” Kirk said finally.

Spock gaped at him. “You do?”

Kirk smiled. He really did. It looked just enough like the standard one that it wasn't an affront to his ideas of conformity. His view being if you were going to serve on a starship, you should look the part.  _ Besides _ , Kirk thought to himself,  _ Spock looked, well, cute. _ Suddenly Kirk felt this overwhelming desire to coo at Spock and parade him around the ship. What the hell what that about?

“See, Mr. Spock. I told you the Captain wouldn't mind.” Kirk and Spock both turned to look at Mr. Farrell, his round face smiling at them both.

“See Mr. Spock,” Kirk mimicked, unable to stop the grin spreading over his face at the Vulcan's expression.

Spock said nothing as he narrowed his eyes at both humans. This only made Kirk's smile wider and Mr. Farrell seemed not to notice.

“It's a good thing too,” Mr. Farrell said. “‘Cause he couldn't get into his old jacket at all.”

At that, Spock's face drained of all color and Kirk saw the signs that his first officer was ready to go critical. He remembered that same look on the Vulcan’s face right before he put Mr. Sulu in the sickbay.

“Mr. Farrell,” Kirk said after clearing his throat. “Go to the galley and fetch Mr. Spock an apple. Immediately. He looks hungry.”

Mr. Farrell must have caught Spock's expression as he jumped up immediately, saluted, shouting, “Sir, yes Sir,” and ran out the door. Kirk watched him go and then turned back to Spock. The Vulcan looked calmer, but his face was flushed and Kirk couldn't but give him a lopsided smile.

“Perhaps, I spoke too soon about Mr. Farrell.,” Spock said.

Kirk leaned on a table close to Spock. “He's a good man and a hell of a guard, but sometimes he gets too comfortable around people. I should have warned you. I guess I've gotten use it over the years.”

The Vulcan pursed his lips. “Indeed.”

“Just don't hurt him, okay?” Kirk replied. “I would like him back in one piece after this is over with.” Kirk said finally. Spock nodded his head and Kirk took that to mean he understood. He pushed off the table and headed toward the exit. The sound of Spock's voice made him stop and turned around.

“I should really thank you, Captain. Mr. Farrell has saved me several times this week alone. I didn't think that the crew would be so willing to take advantage of my situation.”

The Vulcan suddenly looked so small and fragile. Kirk found himself reminded of that night when Spock told him he was pregnant. He felt a mix of emotions swimming through his head making him dizzy. He plucked one off the top and went with it.

“Well, you made your choice,” Kirk said matter-a-factly and Spock seemed to shrink again.

The Vulcan studied his boots, the tip of his ears blushing green. “Yes. Yes I did, Captain.” He’d answered low enough that Kirk had barely heard him.

Chewing on his lower lips Kirk suddenly remember Spock lying in a pool of his own blood and decided that he couldn't just leave it like this. He plucked up another emotion and tried again. “We'll get through this, Okay?”

Spock raised his head and peered at him, his brow knotted with confusion. Kirk didn't know if this was any better and he left before Spock could say anything else to him.

 


	8. Chapter 8

"We do not want you in our city. Now take your tithe and go."

Kirk stared at the alien before him. He was trying to bite his tongue, but it was becoming a chore to do so. These creatures had only just recently joined the Empire and had not learned to fear its might. So they treated its representatives like shit on the bottom on their shoes, or that would be the case if these things wore shoes.

Spock had briefed Kirk on these people before the beam down, but he was still surprised by them. They had no definite sex. As far as anyone knew they were androgynous hermaphrodites, which didn't bother Kirk. It takes all kinds.

They were also amphibious and their lower halves were made of tentacles like an octopus. That did bother Kirk some, as someone whose brother had bogged him down with some rather disturbing types of pornography as a child. He stared down at the blue mucus colored flesh and the front tentacles that seemed to move in sync with the alien's arms.

"Look, you don't have a choice here," Kirk said, trying to keep civil. He turned to throw a glance at McCoy and Spock who had beamed down with him. He then turned back to the governor of the planet. "We were sent here to make sure you are assimilating to the laws and custom of the Terran Empire, so you have to let us in."

"Xeiphus, if you will, please consider the implications of not allowing us access to your city." Spock said. Kirk turned to see Spock stepping forward his hands tuck back behind him and to Kirk's surprise looking rather un-intimidating. Over the past several weeks he had noticed a slight change in the Vulcan’s demeanor. Spock seemed to be mellowing out. He was used to Spock striding around his ship with an air of fear inducing dominance. He just seemed calmer and less daunting over all.

As Spock stepped forward, Xeiphus turned a black eye on him completely, the creature’s demeanor changed. It relaxed and seemed enticed as it moved closer to Spock. It raised one of its tentacles up to Spock's face as Spock approached.

Kirk opened his mouth to protest: "I wouldn't do that. Vulcans are touch telepathic and do not like anyone just laying their hands or whatever on them." To his utter astonishment, Spock actually leaned into the touch and shut his eyes, purring.

Kirk hissed to McCoy: "Are you seeing this?"

McCoy bobbed up on his toes and nodded. "Yep. It would seem that file M'Benga sent me was on the money."

Kirk grimaced at this. "What file?" He turned back to see that Xeiphus had paced another of its slimy tentacles on Spock's face. Spock was still purring despite being covered in mucus.

"I asked M’Benga to send me some info on Vulcan pregnancies. It turns out that they're lot different when with child. For one thing they crave touch."

"They do?" kirk asked in disbelief.

"Yeah. In fact Vulcans will separate themselves from the rest of the clan in order to seek others who also pregnant. That way they can indulge with upsetting their kinsmen. Poor Spock has been going crazy these last few days, because he doesn’t have that kind of support on the ship. I indulged him the other day by patting him on the head while I examined him. He really responded to it."

"Responded? Responded how?" Kirk felt a tightening in his belly and his anger flared.

McCoy must have saw something on his face because he took a step back. "Like that.” The doctor pointed at Spock and Xeiphus, who were now locked in a full scale embrace. Kirk's mouth dropped open and for a moment shook with rage. "Commander Spock!" Kirk barked.

The Vulcan snapped to attention. He stepped away from Xeiphus, who made a sad little noise at the loss of its cuddle companion. He turned to Kirk, his face and hair covered in slime. "Captain."

Kirk glared at him as he said: “If you cannot control yourself, you can beam back the ship."

Spock lowered his eyes and gave a nod. "Duly noted, Sir.”

Satisfied that he had reprimanded Spock, Kirk turned back to Xeiphus who was eying Spock in such way that Kirk actual moved himself between the creature and the Vulcan. "As for you," he started.

"You may enter our city," Xeiphus said, interrupting him.

Kirk blinked. "We can? Just like that?"

Xeiphus gave a warm smile, even though it was plain to Kirk that that it was peering over its shoulders at Spock. "Yes,” it replied. “You are with one that is carrying a child. My kinds revere such things and he is welcome here. By association so are you. Mr. Spock, was it? Please, come with me. I wish to show you my city."

Xeiphus held out a hand. Spock stepped out from behind his captain and took the proffered hand, was lead away towards the main gates of the city before them.

Kirk stood in awe as he watched the spectacle. "Are you fucking kidding me?" he breathed.

McCoy stepped next to him. "This was rather fortuitous, wouldn't you say?"

Kirk eyed McCoy frowning. "Come on. I'm not letting Spock out of my sight while we're down here."

~*~

It would turn out that was easier said than done. Xeiphus kept its word and showed them around the city, but this actually consisted of leading Spock around and talking to him about the creature’s history and culture, while Kirk and McCoy were generally ignored. McCoy seemed to take all in stride, but Kirk could feel his temper rising by the second.

It was bad enough that Kirk was being disrespected, but Xeiphus seemed to think that Spock was there for his consumption, as he ogled and touched every inch of the Vulcan. However, it wasn't just Xeiphus, it was every one they came across. It would seem that these people didn't so much revere pregnancy, but got off on it in a big way. It wasn't until they were invited back to Xeiphus' house for mid day meal that Kirk really saw this.

They were greeted by Xeiphus' mate who looked exactly like Xeiphus, but colored a soft purple and that thing took to Spock right away too. Then there was Xeiphus eldest child, Lyinx who had all but tried to carry Spock off in its arms. The three of them ushered Spock off toward the house leaving Kirk and McCoy scrambling to keep up. Spock had been seated at the head of the table while they piled around him as close as each one could. Meanwhile Kirk and McCoy were left at the other end alone and all but forgotten.

It wouldn't be so bad, Kirk later mused, if Spock would have reacted in his normal way, by pushing them away and threatening them with bodily harm should they presume to touch him again. Now it appeared that Spock was content to let them touch him and touch them in return. In fact short of having an actually smile on his face, Spock looked like he was having fun. The whole thing upset Kirk to no end.

After the meal, in which kirk had to remind their host that he and McCoy liked food too, Lyinx offered to show Spock the gardens. Kirk was averse to letting the first officer go, but he dismissed him so the Vulcan could actually talk to Xeiphus about what the empire expected of them in the future. That discussion was worse than pulling teeth. Once Spock was gone, Xeiphus and its mate lost all interest in their visitors.

Kirk was able to keep Xeiphus somewhat engaged, but in the long run he gave up after Xeiphus declared that it was going to purchase some type native candy for Spock to take home.

Left alone Kirk and McCoy thought about their day.

"Can you fucking believe it?" Kirk said under his breath.

McCoy snorted and helped himself to a decanter of wine. "Yes and no. I would be pissed, but this has been kinda interesting to watch. I've never seen Spock so happy." After taking a long pull from the bottle he handed it off to Kirk who looked it morosely.

I have,” Kirk said.

McCoy took back the bottle and rested his chin on a hand. “Really? Tell me about it.”

Kirk frowned at his hands and blew out a sigh. “I shouldn't tell you this, but it was back when we first started fucking.”

McCoy's eye glittered. “Go on...” he prompted.

Kirk sighed again and fell back on his pillows staring at the circling. “We were taking shore leave on Earth and we were in the Imperial City. I had been feeling generous and indulgent, so I took Spock out to the Arena. I blew all my credits on a private box, so we could be alone. I spent the whole day watching Spock, as he watched the games. His eyes were so wide with excitement and he had the tiniest hint of a smile on his face as he shouted with the rest of the crowd. He really let himself go, you know? I guess it's because no one could see him. Afterwords, when we were leaving, I surprised him with some sugared chrysanthemums. Later, we fucked like rabbits and he told me that it had been the best days of his life.”

Kirk sighed again and sat up to see McCoy smiling stupidly at him. His nose wrinkled in disgust.

“What's with that look,” he snapped.

“Oh, nothing,” McCoy said the smile still plastered on his face.

Kirk made a face and turned away from the doctor. He never said and would never admit, but it made him insanely happy that he had been able to draw that response from Spock. It had been a memory that he cherished.

Now here was Spock getting that level of joy from complete strangers on a foreign world, just because he was hormonally imbalanced. The idea left a very sour taste in Kirk's mouth. He turned back around, snatched the wine from McCoy and rise the bottle to his lips, taking a long drink before handing back to McCoy to finish off. "Come on. Let's find Spock and head back to the ship." he said, standing up and stretching.

McCoy peered at him from where he sat on the floor. "What are going to tell the Brass? We really didn't get what we came for."

"We'll make something up. I'm not sticking around here and wasting anymore time."

McCoy shrugged. "Alright. Just let me find some of that wine to take back. It's the least we deserve."

Kirk let out a sigh. "Fine. Just meet us outside the city in ten minutes."

McCoy gave a salute and grinned. "You got it, Captain." He stood and scampered off and kirk blew another sigh as he headed in the directions he had last seen Spock go.

The house was very open made of large airy rooms with sizable windows and doorways, many that opened out to lush gardens. Kirk stopped a few times to study a flower or a type of colorful bush before moving on. He wouldn't be surprised to find Spock with an arm load of specimens to take back to the ship.

What did surprise Kirk was when he finally found Spock, the Vulcan had been much too busy to gather any specimens.

Kirk stood frozen in place as he watched Spock fucking Lyinx, with every sign of enjoyment. Even as much as Spock had let loose with him he had never seen Spock so passionate. He was rutting into Lyinx hard and fast, his eyes shut, mouth open, grunting and moaning with abandon. Under him Lyinx writhed and moved its arms and tentacles all over Spock's body. One had even penetrated Spock's ass and was moving in time with Spock's own thrusts. Kirk stood mesmerized before shaking off the shock.

"Spock!" Kirk marched at full speed across the gardens. He watched as both parties jumped and Spock quickly disengaged himself from Lyinx and stood to attention.

Kirk looked over Spock's slime covered body and sneered. "I don't know what the fuck you think you are doing, but get dressed. We are leaving. Now!"

Spock took in a breath and looked as if he would protest but kirk held up a finger.

"Do not even think to say one goddamn word to me right now. I don't care what the laws are. I will have your ass in a sling and you will wish to every god in the universe that you had never even heard my name. Have I made myself clear."

Spock gave a nod and Kirk held up a hand. "I didn't hear a 'yes, Sir. Right away, Captain!"

"Yes, Sir. Right away, Captain," Spock mimicked and started collecting his uniform.

Kirk turned his attention from his first officer to Lyinx who was glaring at him indignantly. Kirk leaned down so that they were nose to nose. "One word from you and you're sushi."

Lyinx appeared confused for a moment and then raised a hand to Kirk's face. Kirk allowed it and watched as the creature pulled back as if it had been burned. Lyinx stared at Kirk, its black eyes wide. "I am so sorry. I did not know. Forgive me."

This confused Kirk, but he said nothing as he straightened. It didn't take Spock long to dress though he was filthy from rolling in the mud with Lyinx. It didn't matter as Kirk grabbed his wrist and pulled him all the way out of the city.

"Where have you two been?" McCoy gripped.

Kirk briefly met McCoy’s eyes before pulling out his communicator and ordering them to beamed back aboard the ship.

Once back aboard Spock disappeared until later that night when he appeared in Kirk's quarters clean and wearing a robe.

"Why were you angry with me earlier today?" Spock asked his tone careful.

Kirk didn't look from his desk. "Your conduct was unseemly of an officer of your standing.”

"I see," Spock answered, his tone letting Kirk know that he didn't believe it for one minute.

Kirk thought to fight Spock on this, but decided to let this one go. Beside he had something else on his mind. "Why did Lyinx tell me it was sorry? What was it did it not know?" He turned to look at Spock. The Vulcan was wrapped in blue silk and it clung to him suggestively. Kirk's eyes trailed down his body, his gaze pausing over Spock's bump. Spock moved crossed his arms over his stomach and Kirk turned his eyes away.

"The Eridu are touch telepathic like my kind and they were very keen to get to know me, because of my condition. They are very liberal people and share mates, but only with everyone’s consent and by arrangement," Spock started.

Kirk licked his lips turning back to look at Spock again. "So?"

Spock walked up to Kirk and looked down at him. "I quickly surmised this to be the case. I gave them the impression that while I was in with child, I did not have a mate. That I was available, because as far as I am concerned that is the truth. Lyinx apologized to you, because when he touched you whatever you were thinking and feeling at the time gave him the impression that you are my mate and he had overstepped himself by sleeping with me without your consent."

Kirk sat there as silence filled the room.

Finally Spock said, "Tell me Captain, what was going through your head that would give them that impression?"

They two of them peered at one another neither blinking. Kirk finally looked away turn back to his PADD. "I couldn't say Spock. Now get out. I have paperwork to finish."

"Of course, Captain. Good night."

Kirk listened to the swoosh of Spock's robe moving against his body and the fresher door open and close. He sat back in his chair and scrubbed his face with his hands. He thought back to that moment in the garden with Lyinx touching his face. There had been a lot going through his head at the time, but the main thought had run out like a bell.

He had thought about Spock and with that though a word crossed over his mind like a storm.

_Mine_


	9. Chapter 9

The red alert blared across the bridge as Kirk stepped out of the lift. Spock stood as he approached, saluting.

“Spock what is happening?” Kirk demanded as he took his place at the conn.

Spock stood at his right. “We appear to have intercepted a Cardassian battle cruiser, bearing one mark four, Captain.”

“What?” Kirk turned to the view screen and took in the sight of the alien ship before them. “What is one of those scum doing out here?” he wondered aloud.

“Perhaps looking for trouble,” Spock suggested. This made Kirk smile.

“Well, then they found it. Uhura.” Kirk spun the center seat to face his communications officer. “Have they made contact with us yet?”

“No sir, nor have they responded to our hails asking their business in Terran space.”

“I see,” Kirk said facing forward again. “Chekov are our shields up?”

The ensign turned to face Kirk, his one good eye shining. “Yes, sir,” he answered promptly and Kirk beamed.

“Excellent. Ready the torpedoes. Mr. Sulu, how long before we are in firing range?”

“Three minutes, Sir.”

Kirk crossed his legs and grinned. It had been a long while since they had seen battle and he hummed with excitement. There was just one thing.

“Mr. Spock. You are to leave the bridge now.”

The Vulcan blinked at him puzzled. “Captain?”

Kirk felt the eyes of the entire bridge on him. He was not going to have a repeat of the mess hall here. “You heard me, Commander. Go to your quarters.”

Spock drew himself up to his full height. “Captain, I must protest. I would be of far greater use here on the bridge.”

“I am not going argue this with you, because this is not up for debate.” Kirk hit a button on the arm of his chair. “Mr. Farrell, I need you on the bridge now!”

Spock stared at Kirk as it seemed to dawn on him what was happening. “Captain, I must ask that you halt this action,” he hissed.

Kirk stared at him impassively and he heard the doors the lift open. He didn't even bother look behind him. “Mr. Farrell, escort the commander to his quarters.”

The large man came into view and gently placed a hand on Spock's arm. Spock refused to look at the guard and instead focused his attention on Kirk. “Captain,” he began.

Kirk shook his head. “Mr. Farrell, it seems that the Commander is going to resist. Carry him.”

Kirk watched the blood drain from Mr. Farrell's face, but was satisfied as he heard the whispered, “I'm sorry, sir,” before Spock was lifted bodily into the guard's arms.

Kirk watched as Spock was carried off the bridge, the weight of the Vulcan’s stare on him.

Once they were gone, Kirk turned and barked at Uhura:“Lieutenant, have the Cardassians answered our hails yet?”

“No sir,” Uhura answered quickly as if nothing had happened and Kirk was thankful for that.

“Are we in firing range, Mr. Sulu?”

The Helmsman stiffened but answered, “yes sir.”

Kirk's gaze turned to Chekov who was carefully facing forward.

“In your own time, Ensign,” he said and shut his eyes, listening to the sound torpedoes hitting their mark. 

~*~

McCoy's voice could be heard through the door and halfway down the corridor. Kirk stood outside Spock's cabin door and marveled at how the man's voice carried even with his two pack-a-day habit. The doctor possessed the best set of lungs on the ship, apart from his own.

There was break in the screaming and Kirk decided it would be time that him went inside. He stepped into the room as McCoy seemed about to start another barrage. Spock was nowhere to found, but Mr. Farrell was sitting at Spock's desk trying to make his large frame as small as possible under the Doctor's verbal assault.

“Alright, alright, what's the meaning of this?” Kirk shouted over top of McCoy. He placed both hands on his hips, giving McCoy an expectant stare.

McCoy was wide eyed, the blue contrasting with his flushed face. He took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. “Do you know who is giving Spock milkshakes?”

“Milkshakes?” Kirk asked. He lower his hands off his hips and stepped forward, puzzled. “You're in here screaming about milkshakes? Are you drunk again?”

McCoy's face went from red to purple, but he kept his voice level. “I am a doctor, dammit, whose patient is drinking up to seven milkshakes a day and I wanna know where he's getting them from because I had his diet card changed so he couldn't have them anymore. Now Mr. Farrell doesn't know anything supposedly, but something tell me that he does, so I'm trying find out.”

Kirk took in McCoy blue eye stare and his determined stance then clicked his tongue. “You're insane.”

McCoy stammered and balled his fists.

Kirk stifled a yawn. “Yeah, yeah. Look I don't want you harassing my guard and I'm not going to have you talking Spock like that either. So, why don't you go back to your sickbay and fuck off,” Kirk said as he placed as arm around McCoy's shoulder and proceeded to lead him out of the room.

By this time McCoy's ability to speak returned. “I'm going to find out, and when I do I'm going to chew their ear off. Spock's doesn't need all those calories and fat in his diet. I mean one milkshake once in a while is fine. Hell, I would even over look one a day, but the number he is consuming is too much and this is going to stop!”

By now Kirk had pushed him out the door and McCoy stood out in the hall of the ship yelling. Kirk merely watched him impassively. “Okay, Bones. Night,” he said as he started to shut the door.

A suddenly look of revelation crossed McCoy face and he stuck his foot in the door. “It's you,” he exclaimed as the door bounced back open.

Kirk's eyes narrowed, but he said nothing and instead tried to pushed McCoy out of the doorway.

“It is you, isn't it? Admit it!” McCoy shouted.

“I admit nothing,” Kirk said.

“You don't deny it either,” McCoy retorted. The two men glared at each other.

Kirk stepped back and smiled. “Fine. Whatever makes you happy. Just get the fuck on somewhere!”

McCoy's glowered at him, finally removing his foot from the door's path. “I'm going to check your diet card and then we'll see,” he shouted as the door shut on him. Kirk gave the door a dismissive wave of his hand and turned way, pulling a small colored disk from a pocket inside his vest. Mr. Farrell seemed to relax in his chair and sighed. Scrubbing his face with both hand, he peered at Kirk through his fingers.

“I'm sorry for that Sir,” he muttered and Kirk gave him a dismissive shake of the head.

“Don't worry about it. I have it on a good information that McCoy's replicator is on the frizz and not producing his smokes, so he's a little on edge. Add to that the fact that he is taking this whole look after Spock a little too seriously...” He gestured as to say, ‘there you have it.’

He moved over to Spock's replicator and pushed in the disk. He pushed a button and waited.

“Sir,” Mr. Farrell called.

“Yes,” Kirk said not looking at him.

“You know Mr. Spock isn't very happy about what happened today,” Mr. Farrell said hesitantly. Kirk pursed his lips and sniffed as the hatch in the replicator slide open. He pulled out a tall glass filled with a thick white substance. 

He turned to look at the large man. “I get that, but he will need to get over it. I did what was right and he knows it. Where is he anyways?' Without a word Mr. Farrell pointed over to the fresher door. Kirk gave a nod of thanks and turned towards the door.

It was locked but Kirk pulled out his dagger and wedged it open enough that he could force it all the away. He found Spock soaking the tub, a cloth over his eyes, his skin green from the hot water. Kirk noticed the that the tub was too short for him to stretch out in, so his knees were up, gooseflesh covering them. It also covered Spock's distended stomach. Kirk hadn't noticed before, but now he could see how big Spock had actually gotten.

“Mr. Farrell? Is that you?” Spock asked. He turned his head towards Kirk.

“Nope. It's just little ol' me,” Kirk replied, hopping up on the counter of the sink.

Spock tensed. “What do you want, Captain?”

Kirk frowned at the tone Spock had used. Cold, clipped and pissed off. 

“I wanted to stop by and see how you are doing,” he said.

Spock snorted and turned his head away. “I am fine. Thank you. You may go.”

“What? You don't get to give me orders. Mr. Farrell said you might still be upset with me and frankly...”

Immediately, Spock sat up in the tub pulling the cloth from his face. He glared at Kirk, his eyes burning. “You ordered Mr. Farrell to carry me off the bridge and he did. In front of the crew!” Spock's voice was laced with venom and each word was like a dart.

They each hit their mark, but Kirk wasn't one to shrink back. He drew up on the counter and stared Spock down. “I did what was best. You wouldn't leave even after I gave you a direct order.”

Spock deflated some, but he wasn't beat yet. “I wanted to stay and contribute. You needed me.”

Crossing his arms over this chest, Kirk shook his head. “No I didn't. What I needed was for you not to get hurt. We were getting ready to go into battle with a Cardassian Cruiser. One hit and you would have been laid out in the floor and god only knows what would have happened. I wasn't going to have that. Not on my watch. You got that?” Kirk hopped off the counter and knelt down beside the tub as he spoke and Spock edged back from his captain. He lowered his eyes and sighed.

“Affirmative, Captain.”

Kirk snorted and stood. “Good, I'm glad we understand one another.” He reached over to the counter and picked the glass again, holding it out to Spock. “I brought you a milkshake.”

Spock didn't look at him, but he licked his lips. “What favor?” he said after a few seconds.

“Peach.”

Without looking at Kirk, Spock took the shake from him. He sipped the frothy, thick liquid and made a happy little noise.

Kirk said nothing but watched amused.

“Dr. McCoy is not too happy about the amount of these I am consuming,” Spock said after a few more sips.

“Do you want to me to stop bringing them to you?”

“No, “Spock said taking another drink. “However, Dr. McCoy will be angry with you if he ever finds out.”

Kirk rolled his eyes. “I'm sure he will be, but oddly enough, I don't care,” Kirk quipped. He ran a hand in the water. It was almost boiling hot for him so it must be lukewarm for Spock. “I thought you didn't like baths, or water in general?”

Spock swallowed the mouthful of shake he had and shrugged. “I do not, however I find that it soothes my back and ankles. They ache constantly from carrying the baby. Unfortunately, the water gets cold much too quickly for my liking.” He held out the half empty container to Kirk. “Speaking of which, I need to get out now. Would you?”

Kirk took the glass from Spock, setting it on the nearby counter. He then grabbed Spock's outstretched arms and helped the Vulcan to stand. Once out of the water Spock started to shake and Kirk quickly found a towel to cover him with. Spock wrapped it around his hips and stepped lightly on to the bath mat.

“Thank you, Captain, “ Spock said.

Kirk just shrugged. He watched Spock clean the steam off the mirror and as he did Kirk counted the green stretch mark on his body. They were jarring, since the last time Kirk saw Spock nude his skin had been unmarked and pristine.

He studied the curve of Spock stomach, how it stood out so prominently from the rest of him. Even his belly button was popped out, looking like a fat green button to be pushed. Spock seemed to be fussing over his beard, but Kirk focused on something else.

Spock had breasts. Or perhaps that wasn't the right term. They didn't look like the breasts of a woman, but they were far too swollen and fat to be call pectorals. The thing was they didn't look bad on Spock's pregnant body. They seem to tie with everything else.

Kirk stared at them, observing their shape and the way the nipples seemed darker, green, and plumper. A sudden desire filled him and he imagined his mouth clamped down on one of those buds, while Spock moaned softly in his arms.

“Captain?” Spock cut through his thoughts and Kirk's eyes jerked up to meet Spock's raised eyebrow. “I do not mean to be rude, but why are you still here? Was there something else?”

“Yeah,” Kirk said hurriedly, the ghosts of his last train of thought threatened to make him stumble over his words. “I wanted to let you know we’ll shortly be orbiting Vulcan.”

“Oh,” Spock said quietly. His face looked pale and he frowned look down at the sink.

“You don't sound happy about it,” Kirk said.

Spock shrugged. “It does not matter if I am happy or not. It wouldn't change anything.” He let out a small sigh. He turned towards Kirk. “When I beam down, I ask that you accompany me.”

Kirk blinked several times. “I guess I could, but are you sure? Won't that cause some trouble with your husband to be?”

“No one knows that the child is yours. As far as everyone will know you are my captain. Nothing more.” Spock tone was cold and it stung.

Kirk did his best not to let on. “Oh. Well, in that case, sure. I've always been a little curious about your family.”

He smiled and Spock peered at him for a moment before looking back the mirror.

“One good thing about all this will be once I get off ship I can have some of my needs seen to,” Spock replied with a trace of bitterness.

“Needs?” Kirk asked.

All at once Spock seemed to blush as he kept his eyes averted. “I am rather embarrassed to say, but I have been without a sexual partner for a sometime now. It seems everyone on the ship is terrified of what you might do to them.” Now Spock did look at Kirk. His eyes were dark and his lips were pulled thin.

“I maintain that I did the right thing with Quinn,” Kirk said.

Spock clicked his tongue but said nothing else. He turned back toward the mirror and started to comb his hair. Kirk watch as he did his previous thoughts reentered his head.

“You know Spock,” Kirk started. “I'm sure there is a way that all your needs can be met...” Suddenly he imagined himself pulling Spock into his quarters, pushing the Vulcan down on the bunk. In his mind, the towel was gone and Spock lay prone on his back, his arms over his head, as Kirk lapped his tongue over Spock's quivering body.

_ Just once for old times sake... _

Spock gazed at him, uncertainty clouding his features. “Captain what are you suggesting?”

Kirk slapped on his most charming smile. “Well Spock....”

“If you are suggesting that I sleep with you, Captain, I would like to point out how wrong that would be given the circumstances.”

Kirk's mouth snapped shut and he cleared his throat. The smile was gone and he sucked on his cheeks in anger. He said with a sneer: “Hey, I was only just gonna suggest have your replicator produce a couple of fat dildos for you. I say a couple cause you'll want see how many you can shove in your over-stretched hole.”

The words echoed around the room and Spock stiffened noticeably. Kirk peered into his face and he realized that he had gone too far. He opened his mouth to say something else, to make a joke, to take it back, but Spock held up a hand.

“Please Captain. What ever you are about to say, save it. It has been a long day. I for one am quite fatigued. I am sure you are as well. So, I bid you good night.”

Spock turned away and head towards the door. Kirk saw that he was shaking as he walked.

“Spock wait,” he called out.

“Captain, no.”

Kirk waited to see if Spock would say anything else but he didn't. Spock simply exited the fresher in silence leaving Kirk alone. Kirk peered around and noticed that Spock had left the half drank milkshake on the counter. He thought to pick it up and take it to him. To make some joke and to tell Spock that he didn't mean what he said. But he didn't. He just knew that anything he said right now would fall on deaf ears and why wouldn’t it?

He left the drink where it was and dragged his feet back to his own quarters. Once inside he went over to where he kept his brandy and picked up the whole bottle. He carried it over to his bunk and flopped down, not even bothering to take his boots off. He consumed the entire bottle before he finally fell asleep.

The next morning, Spock said nothing to him until the end of shift and Kirk caught him alone in the turbolift. They stood together, with Spock avoiding Kirk's stare.

“Spock,” Kirk began, “about what I said--”

“Captain, please. I do not wish to discuss it.”

“But, Spock,” Kirk tried.

“Captain, I do not care,” Spock replied.

Kirk pursed his lips and looked away. Silence filled the lift.

“Am I still welcome to join you on Vulcan?” Kirk asked finally.

Spock looked at him and blinked. “I didn't think you still wished to attend.”

Kirk gulped and gave Spock a quick smile. “I want to be there if you still want me there.”

Spock titled his head still looking confused. “I do,” Spock said softly.

Kirk flashed him another smile, this one brighter than before. “Okay. Good.”

Silence filled the lift once again, but this time it was peaceful.

Kirk drew himself up to his full height. The weight on his shoulders was gone.

 


	10. Chapter 10

Peering around, it was apparent to Kirk that everything around him was red. The sand underfoot was red and the sky above was red. It was no wonder that Vulcan was once a planet of intergalactic savages. The wind blew past him carrying sand away in its wake. Kirk watched as the breeze took shape and sparkled. He thought of the deserts of Earth and how the people who live in them found had gods, astronomy and mathematics. Of course, you would have to find something in an environment like that or else you would go mad--

He had beamed down to the planet's surface about fifteen minutes ago with Spock and McCoy. Mr. Farrell would have been here but he had been relieved of his duty after Kirk and Spock got in the pissing contest about a piece of luggage, each taking turns ordering the large man to pick up it, or put it down. He was at his witsend when McCoy finally  stepped in and told Mr. Farrell to report to sickbay.

They were told that someone would be along to pick them up. Kirk had questioned why they couldn't have just beamed directly to Spock's childhood home, but Spock had told him that it would been seen as suspicious to the neighboring estates and could lead to fighting along the families. So as sand slowly covered their boots and attempted to consume them they waited.

"Captain?" Spock's voice broke through his thoughts and Kirk let out a breath he had been holding.

"I’m fine Spock," he answered. "How are you doing?" He added after a second thought. To left he saw McCoy smirk at him, but he ignored it.

To his right, Spock ran a hand down his protruding stomach and cradled it, his expression as passive as ever. "We are well, Captain."

 _We_. Kirk wasn't sure when Spock started using that instead of _I_ but it was catching. Spock used the plural pronoun all the time. “We are doing well” or “We are tired.”

McCoy was getting bad about it too, with his “y'all's.” Kirk had even let loose a “how is everyone?” one morning after a long night. Nothing was said about it, but Spock's prim little answer of, “we are just fine, Captain.”

In the distance a cloud of dust rose over the horizon as a sleek black air car approached. McCoy gave a whistle and Spock seemed surprised.

Kirk gave Spock a grin. "So we're getting the royal treatment eh?"

Spock glanced at Kirk, but said nothing turning his gaze back on the road. The car came to a silent stop before them and when the drivers side door opened, out stepped a stunning Vulcan female.

She was slightly shorter than Spock and seemed to be all legs. Her thick brown hair was down around her shoulders, but pushed behind her ears, showing off the tiny silver hoops that ran up the curve of each ear. Deep brown eyes peered at each of them before settling on Spock. A muscle on the side of her face twitched just to the right of her mouth and Kirk realized that she was smiling.

"Spock," she said her voice deep and rewarding.

Spock bowed his head to her and peered back her his expression soft. "T'Pring, I am surprised to see you,” he said his tone hinting at affection.

T'Pring raised an eyebrow. "Are you? I do not know why. As if I would let another come get you. Stonn wanted to be the first to greet you, but I beat him to it," she said as her eye lit up with pride.

Spock shook his head. "Everything is a competition with you."

T'Pring's face twitched again. "Yes, but this time it was a matter of selfishness. I wanted you to myself for a while before the party tonight."

"Of course," Spock said. At this moment McCoy coughed loudly and drew everyone’s attention to him.

"You are being rude, Spock," T'Pring said and if Kirk didn't know better he would think that she was teasing Spock. Perhaps she was because Spock made a noise that could have been a laugh.

"Shush and do not tell my father," Spock said his face so serious and yet there was another little jerk of T'Pring's mouth.

"I would never,” she said. “Now tell me who your companions are."

"As you wish. T'Pring. This here is the chief medical officer of the Enterprise, Dr. Leonard McCoy...." Spock waved at McCoy who gave a bow of his head and smiled. T'Pring nodded back and then turned her attention to kirk.

"...and this is my captain, James T. Kirk." Spock said and T'Pring's eyes lit up.

"Ah, the Captain Kirk. I have heard much about you." She turned to Spock and added, "I am jealous." Kirk looked at Spock his expression questioning.

Spock shook his head. "Shush, T'Pring. Come we should be off. I have been on my feet for far too long today and I wish to take a bath before tonight events."

"Of course. Let's load your things and we will be on our way," T'Pring said coming around the side of the car and picking up Kirk's bag. She lifted it with no sign of effort and then picked up McCoy's bag as well. She moved to the rear of the car calling over her shoulder, "one of you take Spock's parcel."

Kirk reached down and lifted the bag and handed it to T'Pring to load into the trunk of the car. They then all piled in, with Spock seated up front while Kirk and McCoy sat in the back. T'Pring put on a pair of sunglasses on and doing a U-turn in the road then drove back the way she came at top speed.

The drive to the city was uneventful even with McCoy's prayers asking god to not let him die on this forsaken planet. T'Pring drove like she held a grudge against the road and refused to slow down even when they entered the city limits.

The speed itself didn't bother Kirk though he would have liked to have seen the buildings a bit better. Meanwhile, Spock appeared to be right at home in the passengers seat chatting to T'Pring. Kirk couldn't quite catch what they were saying but he took a guess that some of it was about him from the way T'Pring peered back at him in her mirror.

As they drove out of the city proper, Kirk saw that the buildings were now large manor homes and estates. In front of one of these, T'Pring stopped the car and got out.

McCoy opened his door and slid to the ground muttering thanks to god from not letting him die. Kirk ignored him as he hopped out. He offered Spock his hand to get out. Spock took it while T'Pring watched the exchange a knowing little smirk on her lips before pulling everyone's bags from the trunk and hauling them to the door.

Kirk marveled at the interior of the house. The main parlor was large and seemed to serve no purpose other than to impress people. "I never knew Spock came from money like this?" he muttered.

"Well, he is the son of an ambassador," McCoy hissed back.

"Yeah but still,” he said turning to look at Spock.

Spock gave him a look that said ‘I will explain later’.

Another figure entered the room, a tall, sturdy looking man with dark hair and eyes. He wore a black and green tunic and pants. On his face was a trimmed beard. Even before he said a word Kirk knew who he was. Spock's father.

"Spock, welcome home," the man boomed.

Spock stepped forward the his hand outstretched in front of him. "Na'shaya sa-mekh," he greeted as his the tips of his finger meeting with his father's.

"Na'shaya sa-kai," his father said before taking a step back to look Spock over. He peered into Spock face his expression unreadable. "You appear to be well and further along than I had thought." There was pause before he said, "no matter. Come Spock, you must introduce me to your companions and my guests."

Once introductions were over and Kirk learned that Spock's father was named Sarek, he and McCoy were both shown to their rooms. His was so large that it seemed it could house at least ten men. He took in the thick rugs, the silk wall coverings, the drapes, and furniture, and gaped in awe. "Dear lord, Spock, if this is guest room what does your room look like?"

"My room has as larger bed and an adjoining patio that leads out into my own private gardens. I hope father has maintained them in my absence."

Kirk noticed that the Vulcan was smiling oh so slightly at him. "Would you like to come see, captain?"

"Yes. Yes I would and while we're there you can tell me about your friend and the party tonight since no one has told me anything about either."

Spock's expression changed and he sighed. "Very well, Captain. Set your things down and follow me." Kirk did just that and he was led through another part of the house. Spock's room was behind a set of large double doors and the size of it made Kirk's room looks like a closet. As Kirk stood in the center turning in a circle while Spock watched him, clearly very amused. "You act like this is new to you.”

"Excuse me, Spock, I grew on a farm in Iowa and shared a room with my brother until I was thirteen. This room here is size of the whole first floor of where I grew up. I had no idea that you were such a spoiled brat."

Spock drew himself up indignantly. "I am not a spoiled brat. It is not my fault that my family is well off."

"If you say so, Mr. I-have-private-gardens-outside-my-bedroom,” Kirk quipped.

Kirk could tell that his teasing had gotten to the Vulcan as Spock made a face and sat down heavily on a plush looking sofa.

“Are you gonna sulk now?” Kirk asked moving over to the couch.

Spock turned his head and refused to look at him. “Vulcans do not sulk.”

Kirk said, grinning: “You do. You're actually quite good at it. This pregnancy has told me a lot about you, Spock.” Spock suddenly turned to Kirk, his eyes wide. “I didn't say it was bad thing, so don't look at me like that,” Kirk said sitting down next to the Vulcan.

“So who's T'Pring?” he asked gently.

Spock relaxed and looked down. “Is it not obvious? She is an old friend. One of a few I had as a child.”

Kirk processed this and nodded. “A good friend?” He felt his stomach knotting at that.

Spock turned his eyes to face him again. “Indeed. At one time our family had hoped we would marry. We had other plans.”

Kirk relaxed some and smiled. “And what were those?”

“I joined the Imperial Fleet and she eloped with our friend Stonn. My family forgave me, but hers never forgave her. She could not care less for she was welcomed by Stonn's clan with open arms.”

“Good for her,” Kirk said while Spock nodded.

They sat in silence for a moment before Spock stood from the sofa. “Excuse me, Captain. It's getting late and I need to change for the party tonight,” Spock said as he stood.

Kirk cleared his throat. “Right the party. What party?”

“It is the announcement party. I am to meet my intended. Our bonding will be announced to the community.”

Kirk frowned. “You don't even know this person.”

Spock shook his head. “No matter. They are doing me and my clan a favor.”

“Spock why are you doing this? You obviously don't want this, so why bother?”

Spock turned back towards Kirk and stepped closer to him. His dark brown eyes peered into Kirk's and for a moment Kirk felt something go through him. “Come back to the ship with me,” he whispered.

Spock looked away. “I have my duty.”

“What about your duty to me? What about your duty to the ship?”

Spock shut his eyes and shook his head. “You informed me that you did not wish anything to do with my pregnancy and yet here you are twisting everything so it is all about you, in an attempt to persuade me to obey your will. I do want to come back to the ship, but I have to do what is right by my clan.”

“Okay. So, you do the marriage thing, have the kid and then come back,” Kirk offered.

Spock’s face contorted in anger. “You think that I would go through all this only to abandon my child, so I can go back to what? Like before? Where I was something you did for fun? The moment I wanted to mean something to you, you turned on me.”

“Hey, I've been defending and babying you this whole time, so don't even start that with me.”

“You have only acted out of jealousy,” Spock hissed. Kirk opened his mouth to speak, but Spock cut him off. “Do not attempt to deny it.”

Taking a step back, Kirk felt blood rushing to his face. He was shaking too. He balled up his fists and was sure that he would strike Spock, but suddenly his anger drained from him and he slumped. He took a deep breath, turned from Spock and headed for the door.

“Captain?” Spock called after him his voice dripping with confusion.

Kirk turned back to face him and shook his head. “You said you wanted to get ready for the party. I mean you wanna look nice when you're paraded around for your future spouse right? You don't want them to think less of you or anything,”

The color drained from Spock's face and Kirk felt shame rising from somewhere deep inside. That didn't stop him from heading once more for the large double doors. “See ya the party, Spock”

Kirk left before Spock could reply.


	11. Chapter 11

The main room was awash with tiny white lights that resembled candles, but gave off no heat, just a pretty glow that made everything sparkle.

Kirk stood by the stairs, out-of-the-way of the festivities, clad in his dress blacks. The drink in his hand was some synthetic wine that reminded him of peaches and honey. Around him everyone seemed to be having a good time.

Over by the buffet, McCoy was chatting up two Vulcan females who appeared to be intrigued in spite of themselves. Not far from where McCoy was, Sarek was taking his hosting duties seriously. He moved around the room like a shark, starting conversations and introducing people. It was little wonder the man was in politics. It was a good thing he was only an ambassador. Anything more and he would be dangerous.

Then there was Spock.

He sat alone in one corner of the room, his dark robes folded around him, drink in hand. Kirk could see that he was attempting to look like he was perfectly okay with being by himself. But he hadn't moved from that spot all evening. Sarek had conversed with him some. From Spock's expression Kirk imagined that Sarek was reminding his son that it was his party after all and it would not hurt him to socialize with the assembled guests. McCoy had brought Spock a plate of food and chatted a bit before he wandered off. Then T'Pring had crouched beside Spock's chair whispering his into ear all night. Kirk wondered where she had gone.

“Captain Kirk.”

“Ah, T'Pring. I was just thinking about you,” Kirk said smiling as he turned.

T'Pring looked stunning. Her thick brown hair was done up in an elaborate hair style. Weaved in the curls, Kirk could see pearls and silver threads. Her make-up was immaculate and she had forgone the traditional robe of her people for a sliver evening gown that complimented her skin. “Were you? My my, lucky me,” T'Pring purred.

Kirk gave her a grin. “What can do for you?” he asked, bringing his drink to his lips.

T'Pring's studied him for a moment. “I came to make small talk. Is that not what humans do?”

Kirk flashed her another smile. “Most humans, yes. I'm not much for myself, unless there is something in it for me.”

The corner of T'Pring's mouth moved into a smirk. “I can see that now. No wonder Spock is so taken with you.” At her words Kirk straightened and focused on his drink. T'Pring's continued to watch every move he made. “That makes you uncomfortable? I cannot understand. Spock's attraction to you is quite logical. You are powerful. You are forthright, intelligent and you a very handsome ─ for a human.” She reached out a hand touching a finger to Kirk's chest letting it trail down the front of his dress uniform. “You are very appealing in this. Did you ever wear for Spock?”

“Not for him specificity, no,” Kirk said, “but I once left it on after a diplomatic function.”

T'Pring's finger had reached the hem of his uniform jacket and seemed to linger there. Her eyes remained locked on his face. She appeared to be thinking. “He told me about that night,” she breathed. Raising an eyebrow Kirk waited for her to continue. “He said you had the idea. He wore one of his civilian robes and together you played out a scene. You were a lonely soldier looking for comfort from a ─ how did he put it? 'A streetwalker.' He told me afterwards that you offered him so much praise for his part.”

T'Pring's finger no longer dwelt at the bottom of his coat as Kirk felt it move up his torso. “He’s told you a lot about me,” Kirk replied.

T'Pring nodded. “Quite a bit, yes. I spent a long time trying to figure out what kind of man you are Captain Kirk. I think I almost have you figured out.”

Kirk stepped back as she dropped her arms, tilting her head to one side, lips pursed.

“Oh really?” he said. “Do tell. What kind of man am I?”

T'Pring readjusted her head and blinked slowly before leaning into Kirk’s ear. “You really are the lonely soldier. You are simply too selfish to see that Spock is not a whore.” She pulled back, smirking as she moved away.

Kirk stared speechless. T’Pring made her way back over to the side of Spock's chair. Judging from the look on Spock's face he had been watching them. Spock gazed at T'Pring as she knelt once more beside his chair. The first officer said something to her, but in response she merely gave a shrug of her slim shoulders.

“Some party, uh?”

The sound of McCoy's voice rang in Kirk's ears, causing him to jump. Kirk spun around glaring at the doctor. “Don't sneak up me.”

“Who sneaking? I've been standing here for five minutes trying to get your attention, but you've been off in fucking la la land. Too busying watching Spock and T'Pring. By the way who the hell is she?”

Taking a moment to calm down Kirk rolled his shoulders and sighed. “She's a friend,” he muttered. He noticed Spock shaking his head at T'Pring and her looking rather put out.

“Friend? Like... _Friend_?” McCoy wondered.

Kirk shook his head. “No. Spock said that everyone wanted to them get married but they didn't.”

“Ah.” McCoy said, swirling his drink. “So, what were you two talking about?”

“Apparently, I'm a good catch yet I'm a selfish bastard,” Kirk said, his tone sullen.

McCoy snorted in response. “Yeah, that's about right. She thinks you mistreated Spock?”

Kirk took a drink from his glass and closed his eyes. “I don't owe Spock anything.”

“No, you don't, but you sure do send a lot of mixed signals,” McCoy replied.

Kirk opened his eyes and glared at the idiot doctor. “I do not.”

McCoy snorted again. “Yes, you do. You tell Spock one thing then turn around and do something else. Spock's so confused by you that it's driving him crazy. He doesn't know what to think or how to feel or anything. He just knows that you want him but don't want him. No wonder he wants to run away and marry someone he's never met.”

Kirk felt himself becoming enraged. “How dare you--”

“Everyone, may I have you attention please.” The sound of Sarek's voice booming over the room stopped Kirk mid sentence and brought a general hush. With everyone else Kirk and McCoy turned toward where Spock had been sitting in silence all night. Sarek had joined him, standing next to his chair, one hand resting on the back of it as he addressed his audience. Spock for his part still appeared distinctly miserable but a better class of miserable as his father spoke.

“He looks so...” Kirk whispered out of the corner of his mouth.

“Defeated?” McCoy suggested, without taking his eyes from the two Vulcans.

“Yeah,” Kirk breathed.

Where he stood Sarek glanced down at Spock and then addressed the party goers:

“Everyone, thank you for attending tonight. As you know this is a special occasion for my household, as this is the night I announce my son’s engagement.” There was a round of polite clapping. Neither Kirk nor McCoy joined in. On the other side of Spock's chair, T'Pring openly wrinkled her nose, her arms at her side. She caught Kirk's eye, giving him a pointed look. He turned his attention back to Sarek.

“Spock, would you stand please?” Everyone watched as Spock stood and faced his father, his robes making a soft swishing noise as he moved.

“He looks kinda cute in those,” McCoy muttered and Kirk gave him a sidewise glance before he nodded reluctantly.

“Spock, please allow me to introduce to you, Alar-sen-dasmeen Galsh Solkath.” A gasp went through the crowd and the room filled with the sound of hushed whispering. Kirk and McCoy looked around bewildered as the Vulcans talked among themselves. From behind a nearby curtain out stepped a large Vulcan male. Spock appeared downright terrified.

“That's the biggest goddamn Vulcan I have ever seen.” McCoy said and whistled.

Kirk shook his head, alarms going off in his head as he perused Spock's intended. The Vulcan was taller than Spock by at least two inches with long dark hair that was pulled back from his face. He wore an open sleeveless robe that exposed well muscled arms and black V-necked tunic and pants underneath. He took one look at Spock and smiled.

“You are Spock?” the Vulcan asked. Kirk watched as Spock straightened, thrusting out his chin.

“I am. It is my pleasure to meet you, Solkath,” Spock replied, giving a bow of his head. Solkath gave a laugh. Another wave of whispering went through the crowd as he grabbed Spock chin.

“You are pretty,” Solkath said, “but I expected nothing less of man from Shi'Kahr.”

“Please don't do anything rash,” Kirk suddenly heard McCoy say.

Kirk turned to regard the doctor. “What?”

“You look like you’re about ready to march up there and start pounding on that Vulcan’s head.”

Kirk became aware of tension in his shoulders. He uncurled his fists and hadn’t even remembered balling them up. Taking a deep breath he looked at McCoy, wiping his mouth with one hand. “I don't know what came over me.”

“Probably the same thing that came over Sarek and T'Pring.”

Kirk looked over at the two Vulcans and sure enough tiny hints of rage pour over each of their features, though for Kirk's money he was willing to bet that T'Pring would be the one to act first. She was shaking, her hands turned in claws at her side. Once more he caught her eye and this time her expression screamed at him to do something.

Kirk tensed to move, but stopped himself. This wasn't his place. He had no right. He numbly turned his attention back to Spock and Solkath.

Spock had pulled from Solkath's grip and was staring him down, his expression hard, his tone full of venom. “As pleased as I am to hear that you find my appearance acceptable, I will have you know that I have more to offer one.”

Solkath just laughed. “You have a will too. Excellent. Come let us make our rounds around the crowd. I wish to meet everyone here.” Turning to Sarek, Solkath added, “I am pleased Sarek. Your son is a gem and will make a fine addition to my family's harem.”

Solkath pulled Spock away as both Sarek and T'Pring vibrated with anger and outrage. Kirk turned to McCoy and saw the shock on the man's face matched his own.

“Harem?” Kirk mouthed.

“I didn’t think that was still practiced,” McCoy said, dumbfounded.

Kirk scoffed licking his lips. “I didn't think Vulcans laughed, but it looks like we're both wrong,” He looked around to see where Spock and Solkath went.

T'Pring marched over towards him. “I cannot believe Sarek. What was he thinking?,” she said as she approached.

“Who is that guy?” Kirk asked.

“He is Alar-sen-dasmeen Galsh Solkath. He is the head of one of the leading clans to the North. They don't follow the teachings of Surak and are generally avoided. He's the worst, because he is little better than a barbarian and now Spock must marry him.” As she spoke she turned her head looking around the room.

She turned to Kirk, her eyes bright and full of anger. “Do something.”

Kirk shook his head. “What? What do you want me to do?” he demanded.

For a moment T'Pring looked crestfallen, her eye wet with possible tears. She blinked and they were gone, her face like stone. “This is your doing,” she said calmly before storming away.

Kirk watched her go. He felt sick. “Could this get any worse?” he said to McCoy.

“Yeah,” McCoy answered his blue eyes darting to something behind Kirk. “Spock's coming towards us now with his fiancé in tow.”

Kirk turned to see that Spock was indeed approaching them, Solkath towering behind him.

“Captain, I would like for you to meet Solkath. Solkath, this is my Captain, James Kirk,” Spock said solemnly.

Solkath grinned, giving Kirk a nod. “Captain Kirk. I've heard of you. Blood thirsty and mad, they say. My kind of man. Please forgive me if I ask you regale me with some of your tale of conquest,” Solkath’s grin grew wider, exposing his teeth.

Kirk returned the smile but there was no trace of humor in it. “I'm sure that there is plenty that I could tell you.”

Beside him McCoy cleared his throat stepping forward and taking Spock's arm. “Spock you're looking a little pale. Let's get you some food and step outside for some fresh air.”

Spock's eye darted from Kirk to Solkath and nodded. “A wonderful suggestion Doctor.” As they walked away toward the buffet, Kirk heard McCoy mumbling about alpha-minded idiots.

He rolled his eyes and returned his attention back to Solkath, who was still grinning. “I supposed I should say congratulation,” he said.

Solkath laughed, nodding his head. “I suppose, even though I'm taking on someone else cast off, but the dowry was worth it. I hope that living in a starship has curbed his appetite for comforts, because he won't get any from me.”

Kirk's left eye twitched. “Well I assure you Spock is not soft, if that's what you're worried about. He's as solid as a rock and a brilliant scientist. I have found him invaluable.”

“Really? You must be feeling put out at losing him?”

Kirk gave a mirthless laugh at that. “You could say that, but I was wondering if maybe arrangements couldn't be made to let Spock return to duty.”

Solkath roared with laughter. “You humans are so amusing. No, I couldn't let Spock go. It is already apparent that he cannot be trusted. He would return to your ship and hop right back into someone else bed. No, no. He will stay here where someone can watch him. He'll get all he can stand from me and my kinsmen.”

Twitch, twitch...

“Your kinsmen? Surely you're not planning to pass Spock around like a cheap bottle of wine?” Kirk tried for jovially but his voice was too tight and hard.

Solkath seemed not to notice. “As your kind says, Captain, 'If the shoe fits...' He'll be happy enough and he only bare children from me, plus I'll make sure no one is too rough with him. He has such delicate features. He'll make for some attractive children which will be good to barter with later. Is there something wrong with your eye, Captain?”

“Nerves,” Kirk said quickly. “That's the trouble with being the captain of a starship. It's hard on your nerves. Would you please excuse me?”

“Of course, Captain. It was a pleasure meeting you. I hope you will stay for the bonding ceremony,” Solkath called after him. Kirk pushed through the other guests heading toward the door to the gardens. Along the way he bumped into McCoy.

“I was just looking for you. Where's Solkath?” McCoy asked.

Kirk snarled: “Fuck if I know and fuck if I care.” A couple of Vulcans nearby glared over at them and he growled at them. After giving him looks of disgust they strode away as quickly as they dared. McCoy raised an eyebrow at him.

“Well, that wasn't nice,” McCoy said.

Kirk shook his head. “I don't care. Fuck the lot of them. Especially that dick Solkath. Where's Spock? We're going home,” Kirk said through his teeth.

McCoy frowned at him. “Home? Jim, you just can't make Spock leave.”

“The hell I can't. He's mine and he's coming back the ship with me.”

“Yours? And yet the only time You want him when someone else does. Are you're so selfish, you can't stand to see him with anyone else?” McCoy glared into Kirk's eyes.

Kirk was aware of the tendrils of shame rising up from inside. He shook them off. “Shut up. I don't care what you say. I'm getting Spock and that's final,” he bellowed out. Around them other guests were watching them.

McCoy grabbed Kirk by the arms, shaking him. “Get a hold of yourself, man. You don't own Spock and even if you did what are you going to do. Grab him up and beam back to ship. Then what? What about his father? What about the marriage. What about the baby?”

Kirk opened and closed his mouth a few times. “I … I don't know, but we'll figure something out. I just can't leave him here.”

McCoy sucked on his lips and sighed. “You don't get a say in this. Unless you step up and tell Spock that you're going take responsibility, He's going to stay here and marry Solkath and that's the end of that.”

Kirk deflated, his shoulder slumping. He leaned into McCoy's shoulder and sighed. “I don't want to lose him, Bones.”

McCoy pushed him up and peered into his face. “Alright, but I think you're gonna have make things right between you. I ain’t sayin’ you have to marry him but the two of you will have to figure something out in order to make everyone happy here.”

“You're right,” Kirk breathed. He looked around and forced a smile for the other guest who were now watching them cautiously. “So, where's Spock?” he asked.

“I left him in the garden. If you head towards the center there is a big gazebo. He should still be there.”

Kirk grinned and turned to head toward the garden's once more when McCoy grabbed his arm. “Don't make me regret this, Jim.”

Kirk gave a nod, pulled away, and went off towards the gardens.


	12. Chapter 12

If the house alone wasn't enough to demonstrating the wealth of Spock's family then the grounds of the estate would convince even the hardest of skeptics. It was for one a true garden, full of blooming flowers, trees and bushes. Everything was bright, green and thriving. All on a desert planet. Kirk thought it unnecessary but still stopped to admire a blooming rose bush.

As he moved Vulcan’s sister, _T'Khut,_ loomed over ahead shining brightly. Once or twice Kirk looked up at it before moving on. The garden was dimly lit with tiny white lights that guided him though he wasn't sure if he was heading toward the center or off to the side. Off the path it's was like a jungle and it threw off Kirk's sense of direction.

Just as he was about to stop and go back to ask for a map, he over heard voices not far from him. He pressed forward thinking it was either Spock's or someone Kirk had could get directions from. The path opened to a clearing that had to be the center.

It was open, well tended, with benches and chairs to sit on. Large topiary bushes were shaped like men and warriors. Somewhere in the distance Kirk heard water tinkling. In the center was a large gazebo, where Spock stood proud and defiant against Solkath.

“If you lay your hands on me again, I will...” Kirk watched as one of Solkath’s large hands came around and struck Spock hard, causing him to stumble.

Solkath leaned down and grabbed Spock by his hair, forcing him to stand upright. Fingers in Spock’s hair, Solkath walked the first officer backward until he hit a wall, pinning him there. “Little prince. You have spent too much time around the humans. Do you think that your tone of voice will work on me? I am afraid not pretty one. Now let us not be enemies. I feel that this can work but you must relent.” Solkath let go of Spock's hair and stroked his face with two fingers as Spock struggled to move away.

Where Kirk stood he seethed. He need to do something, but what? Solkath was huge and from what Kirk could see pure muscle.

“Please unhand me,” Spock's voice was softer and pleading. Worse, Kirk heard it tremble. Spock was afraid.

“That's much better,” Solkath said still caressing Spock's face. “Manners are important and when you come into my home you will need to remember them. I would hate for one my kinsmen to become angry with you because you were rude.”

Solkath's hand moved from Spock's face. Kirk couldn't see where it went but judging from the way Spock gasped and tried to jerk away from Solkath, he had a pretty good idea.

“That son of a bitch,” Kirk hissed under his breath. He looked around desperately for something he could use as a weapon. Up the path that lead toward the gazebo there were small statues of forgotten gods. Walking carefully as so not the make any noise Kirk moved closer to one and lifted it up to test its weight. The statue sat in his hand heavy and solid.

A quiet moan from the gazebo brought Kirk's attention back to task at hand. He took one last look, witnessing Spock being lifted up against the wall with a sick and desperate look on his face while Solkath fussed with his robes. Kirk crunched down and continued up the path as swiftly as he could, making as little noise as possible. He had one chance and he knew that taking Solkath by surprise was essential.

In the gazebo Kirk moved around the wide bench and hid, waiting his chance. Solkath had pressed his mouth to Spock's in a sloppy kiss. It filled Kirk's heart with pride to witness Spock biting the Vulcan. Solkath reared back in pain.

“Worthless whore,” Solkath screamed spitting saliva and green blood everywhere. Once more he brought back his hand to strike Spock but not before Kirk sprung to his feet, bring the statue around like a club.

The blow took Solkath off his feet freeing Spock from his grasp. Seizing the moment Kirk piled on top of the Vulcan and brought the statue down again. It gave satisfying thump and Solkath lay still. A pool of green blood spread out from one side. Kirk raised the statue once more and moved to bring it down again for a final blow.

“James!” Spock’s cry stopped him short. Kirk turned to look at him. With his back still pressed against the wall of the gazebo, Spock looked pale and shaken. Kirk dropped the statue, stood and rushed over to Spock, pulling the Vulcan to him. As his arms slid around Spock's waist, Kirk felt Spock let go limp against him. Spock’s head rested on kirk’s shoulder and seemed curl up while still standing. Silently Kirk brought a hand up to stroke Spock's hair. He thought he heard a whimper but it could have been the wind.

“What is happening here? Spock?” Both Kirk and Spock turned as Sarek strode into the gazebo with T'Pring and McCoy right behind him.

Sarek stared at his son his face turning green. “Spock! What is the meaning of this?” He gestured to Kirk and then to fallen Solkath.

Spock pulled away from Kirk and stepped forward. “Father, I...”

“That human attacked me completely unprovoked,” Solkath cried out. Everyone turned to him he sat up unsteady and glared up at Kirk.

Sarek narrowed his eyes. “Is this true?” he asked his voice low.

Kirk stepped forward and stood next to Spock placing an arm around him. “Mostly. It's true I attacked him. I would have killed him if your son hadn't intervened, but it was for your son that I attacked the bastard.”

“He admits it,” Solkath screamed and Sarek raised a hand to silence him.

“Explain yourself, Captain.” Sarek stepped forward lowering his hand.

“I attacked him because he was attacking your son. He was forcing himself on Spock and had struck him across the face. I do not take kindly to people mistreating my officers. Right now Spock's in no condition to take such abuse.”

With his hand clasped in front of him Sarek peered thoughtfully at kirk, then to his son and then finally at Solkath. Down on the ground Solkath looked at Sarek his face started to cloud with disgust.

“You're not going to believe him, are you?” Solkath snarled. “He is human and you know how they lie.” Kirk glared down at him and snarled, pulling Spock closed to him. Quietly observing this Sarek steepled his fingers and brought them to his mouth. From behind him McCoy and T'Pring both seemed to be smiling.

“Yes, humans are known to lie especially when it suits their purposes,” Sarek said after a moment. “But my son does not lie and he will tell us what actually happened. Spock?”

Spock took a moment to stare at Solkath and then turned to his father. “It is just as Captain Kirk said. I was attacked by Solkath and my captain came to my aid.”

“I see,” Sarek said, shutting his eyes.

Solkath stood up from the ground no longer bothering to appear defenseless and hurt. He towered over Sarek. “You are not going to listen to that nonsense. It's obvious they are in it together to make a mockery of your household--”

“That is enough!” Sarek's voice rang out like a bell. The sound of it made everyone including Solkath take a step back. The elder Vulcan focused his gaze on Solkath. “In lieu of what has transpired here I am declaring the bonding canceled. You are to vacate my lands and pay back Spock's dowry in two weeks time.”

“You dare ask me to leave. I refuse,” Solkath bellowed.

Narrowing his eyes Sarek said: “You can leave of your on free will or I shall have you removed. Do not test me or you will see first hand what I am willing to do for my son.” Sarek's eyes burned brightly and Kirk shivered at the sight of them.

Solkath stepped away carefully. “Very well.” With on last hateful look toward Spock, Solkath stormed away. Kirk watched him go giving Spock a gentle squeeze.

After moment Sarek let out a sigh and moved over toward Spock, taking his son's face in his hands. “I am so sorry,” he said. “I wanted a good match for you and I have failed you. Will you forgive me, my child?”

Spock shook his head. “There is nothing to forgive Father. I understand that you did your best.” Giving a solemn nod Sarek pulled away and offer his hand to Spock who touch the tips of his fingers gentle to his father's.

“Excuse me,” Sarek said pulling his hand away. “I must deliver the news to the other guests.”

“Father, may I be excused to go to my rooms?” Spock asked. Sarek gave a nod and Spock pulled away from Kirk and headed out of the Gazebo.

“Here, let me come with you,” T'Pring said taking his arm.

“I should go with them. To look Spock over, make sure he's not hurt,” McCoy muttered and followed after them.

In their wake, Kirk said: “Maybe I should--” he started but Sarek placed a hand on his chest stopping him.

“I would like to have a word with you alone Captain,” the Vulcan said and his tone told Kirk that he would not be denied. He gave a nod and took a seat on the wide bench. Sarek sat next to him adjusting his robes around him. He gave Kirk an appraising look. “Captain, what do you want with my son?”

Kirk frowned at that. “I don't understand.”

“I think you do. I would like an honest answer please and before you open you mouth understand that I am not above taking steps to get answers.” Kirk could see where Spock got his demeanor from. This man was a rock and not someone to be messed with.

Kirk decided to go for broke. “I don't know.”

Sarek nodded. “A good answer. What do you think you would like with him?”

Kirk swallowed as he looked into Sarek's dark eyes. “I'm not sure. I just know that I don't want to lose him,” he said.

Sarek raised an eyebrow. “Captain, from what Spock has told me you were the one that pushed him away in the beginning.”

“Spock seems to talk an awful lot about me,“ Kirk said almost petulantly. “First T'Pring and now you. I never knew that Spock was so ─ chatty.”  When he looked at Sarek the man's face was like stone but there was an amused cast about his eyes.

“My son speaks to me about everything in his life,” Sarek said. “Of course that which he does not tell me, he shares with T'Pring. You would do well to remember that.” Kirk blinked at this. He wasn't sure what was being implied, whether this was a veiled threat or just a strange type of courtesy. Either way Kirk gave a slow nod of his head to show Sarek he was taking notes.

“What you say is correct.”

Sarek gave a thoughtful tilt of his head. “And yet you have come to my son's aid many times. You have done a great deal for Spock over the course of this pregnancy.”

Kirk nodded wordlessly.

“Captain,” Sarek continued on. “You are aware that Spock's mother was human.” Kirk nodded again. Sarek's mouth twitched a little as the corners moved up just a fraction. “She died when Spock was very young, but I remember she had a saying that came from earth that made a lot of sense.”

Sarek settled back and he stared at Kirk for a long time. “You cannot have your cake and eat it too,” he said finally.

“Ummm, Mr. Ambassador, I don't think--” Sarek raised a hand and Kirk shut his mouth.

“First Captain, you may call me Sarek. Second, you are correct. You do not think. Or I should say you think only of yourself. I have no doubt in my mind that you harbor feelings for my child, though only you know how far they go, but if you think that you can keep Spock and push him away when it's convenient for you, then your are very mistaken.” Kirk chewed on his lower lip and avoided Sarek's gaze. Next to him Sarek held his silence, his hand clasped in his lap his expression serene.

“What is it that you want me to do?” Kirk asked.

After a moment, Sarek lifted his eyebrow again and shook his head. “Captain, I am not here to tell you what to do but see that you make a choice. If you truly do not want my son let him go. Or perhaps the two of you should talk and make your own arrangements. All in all I wish for Spock to be content.”

Sarek rose from the bench and headed back out toward the gardens. Kirk watched him go, his forehead wrinkled in thought. After several minutes he came to a decision and headed out.


	13. Chapter 13

In his room Spock sat in bed, surrounded by pillows. T'Pring sat at the end, pulling hair pins and pearls from her hair. As her style came undone and her curls fell about her shoulders she gave her head a satisfying shake.

“Ah, that is much better,” she breathed. “I am sorry about your party Spock, but I am glad you are not going to bond with that oaf. You deserve so much better than that illogical creature pawing at you for the rest of your life. Put in you his family's harem. Indeed.” She gave an undignified snort and flipped her hair back out of her face. “It is a good thing your Captain was there to save you. And the way he held you in his arms when we arrived. Looks like you may have chance with him yet.” She locked eyes with Spock and winked.

Spock gave a sigh and shook his head. “I somehow doubt it,” he said. After they had returned to his room and McCoy had fished with his exam, Spock had changed into his blue bathrobe and was now playing with its tie.

T'Pring's face didn't change but she blinked at him. “Whatever do you mean, Spock? You saw him. He saved you from Solkath and held you the whole time with your father. He is quite taken with you. I know it. He did not like how I talked to him at the party.”

Spock gave his friend a level look. “T'Pring I can only imagine what you said to him and how you said it.”

T'Pring shrugged. “I was straightforward with him that is all. It seemed like he needed to hear it from someone. Spock, you need to talk to him. See if he will take you back.”

Spock peered out the open double doors that lead outside. “I do not think it is that simple.”

“What's not that simple?”

Spock and T'Pring both turned as Kirk stepped into the room. He had changed out of his dress uniform into a pair of black cotton pants and nothing else. He gave them both a playful half-smile as he moved over to the bed.

“Captain,” T'Pring said warmly. “We were just talking about you.”

“About me? I hope nothing bad,” Kirk said rising a hand to his chest and winking at Spock. Spock felt heart rush to his face as he stared at his captain.

T'Pring picked her hair pins off the bed and stood. “Of course not. Spock speaks so highly of you.”

“Does he now?” Kirk's grin grew and the heat moved down Spock's body. He avoided looking at his captain, but it didn't help, not when Kirk was looking for pointedly at him.

“Always,” T'Pring said. She gave little stretch. “Please excuse me. It is late I need to return home. Goodnight Spock. I will tell Stonn you asked about him. Good night Captain. Please take good care of my friend Spock.”

“Of course,” Kirk said softly as she walked out of the room. Alone together Kirk took T'Pring's place on the bed and took one of Spock's feet in his hands. Gently he started to massage it, rolling his thumbs into the arch.

Spock looked at Kirk who’s hazel eyes were focused on him. “Captain,” he said.

“How are you feeling, Spock?” Kirk asked after a second.

“We are well. Thank you for coming to our aid.”

Kirk gave a nod and continued working on Spock's foot. “You don't need to thank me. I was there and wasn't about to let him hurt you.”

Silence filled the room once more.

“I suppose my father will have to find someone else to marry me now?” Spock said softly.

“Really? Why's that?” Kirk asked, running a hand over Spock's ankle. The warmth of Kirk fingers touch sent shivers down Spock's spine and made his skin prickle.

“Things failed to work out with Solkath. I have to marry someone.”

“What about me?” Kirk suggested.

Spock stared at him, shocked. “I beg your pardon, Captain?”

“We wouldn't have to do it right away or at all if you didn't want, but we could just tell everyone that's what were doing. That way you could home, back to the ship with me.”

Spock shook his head. “Captain...”

“James,” Kirk interjected. Spock paused and Kirk continued. “Please call me James again, Spock. You called me by my name in the gazebo and I had forgotten how good it sounded coming from your lips.”

“James,” Spock said tentatively and Kirk sighed smiling. “James, I do not think...”

“Do not think what?” Kirk peered at Spock his face imploring.

“That it will work. You already said--”

“Spock, please I know and...” Kirk stopped, chewing on his lower lip.

Spock paused once more as he watched his captain.

Kirk glanced down at the foot in his hand. Gently, he brought it to his lips, kissing the top of it. “Spock, I know what I said and I never should have said that. I knew it then, but I was too proud and stupid to do anything about it. I was so concerned about my command that I was willing to toss you aside. But I really couldn't do that, could I? I watched you jealously and threatened everyone around me when it came to you.”

Spock said nothing but continued to observe his captain stroke his foot.

“Tonight your father and T'Pring told me that I was selfish because of the way I treated you,” Kirk continued on. “And they're right. I am very selfish. I'm so selfish that I don't want to let you go. So I'm going to do they most selfish thing I can think of and keep you.”

Spock frowned, tilting his head to one side. He regarded Kirk, unsure of what to say to the man.

“Spock, say something,” Kirk pleaded, breaking the surrounding silence. “I don't want to lose you. Not completely. Just come home with me. I'll do anything you want.” Kirk placed another kiss on Spock foot. The sight and feel of those lips on his skin warmed Spock from head to toe.

“Anything?” Spock asked and Kirk peered up at him his lips still pressed to the top his foot.

“Yes.” Kirk's voice was hushed and filled with need. The sound of it uncurled the knot in Spock's stomach and he found his anxiety fading away under Kirk's touch. Yet, a part of him inside recoiled and he slowly pulled his foot from Kirk's hands.

“Why?” Spock asked.

Kirk stared at him his mouth open and his face pale. “What do you mean why? Were you not listening to me? I just poured my heart out to you and this is what I get? A suspicious and ugly why!” Kirk’s face turned red and flailed his arms as he spoke.

“I heard you, but I never know with you anymore,” Spock said and Kirk froze. McCoy's word rang in his mind.

“Fair enough,” Kirk said nodding his head. “What can I do or say to convince you I'm sincere here? That I mean every word?”

Spock shrugged, frowning. He didn't know what to say cause he truly did not know. He didn't really want to test Kirk like this. He wanted to throw everything aside and welcome Kirk back as his lover. As they say better late than never.

Spock shut his eyes as he considered this. When Kirk's weight at the end of the bed shifted Spock opened them to see him crawling up toward him. He slid between Spock's legs and leaned over him so that they were face to face. Kirk's breath caressed Spock's skin, causing him to tremble.

“Spock, you don't actually want to push me away, do you? If you do then say the word and I'm gone. I won't interfere ever again and you will be free to do as you please. Just say it.”

Spock hesitated.

That was all Kirk needed. He grinned and nuzzled Spock's cheek before whispering into his ear. “I didn't think so. Come on Spock. I'm trying here. I know that I was wrong but let's move past that and--”

Spock pressed a finger to Kirk lips. “Repeat that,” he said.

Kirk pulled back looking lost. “Repeat what?”

“That part where you said you were wrong.”

Kirk’s brow wrinkled and then a grin broke out over his face. He leaned in and whispered once more in Spock's ear. “I was wrong. So very very wrong. You will forgive me?”

Spock closed his eyes and purred softly. He could feel Kirk's warmth soaking into his skin and his lips twitched as he fought not to smile. Kirk pulled back to look at him was once more and Spock sighed as those hazel eyes bore into him.

“I forgive you,” Spock said. He was struck by Kirk's expression, by how relieved it was and Spock was hit with a sudden playful urge. He motioned for Kirk to lean in closer.

He pressed his mouth to the rounded ear. “Daddy.”

Spock felt Kirk tense and wondered if he hadn't pushed too hard too soon, but when he looked into Kirk's face there was only a flush and a wide eyed wonder there.

“Daddy?” Kirk said sitting back on his ankles.

Spock shifted on his pillows under Kirk stare. “Certainly. You are her father, but if you rather I refrained from calling you such things then--”

“I didn't say that. I was just caught off guard and... Wait.” Kirk's expression was one of bewilderment and Spock watched the human’s lips move as he muttered to himself. “Did you say her father?” Kirk asked eventually.

Spock nodded, delighting in the way Kirk was reacting. Pushing himself fully upright, he reached over to the table next to his bed and opened the drawer. From it he pulled a slim tablet and handed it to Kirk.

“What's this?” Kirk asked, taking it lightly in his hands.

“It is an ultrasound of the baby. I finally had them done. What do you think of our daughter?”

As he held the tablet in both hand peering down at it, Kirk didn't say a word. His expression was unreadable too and Spock held his breath while he waited.

Finally, Kirk smiled. “She's beautiful,” he whispered.

Spock exhaled with relief.

“Have you named her?” Kirk asked, still looking down at the tablet.

Spock shook his head. “I have not. Do you have any suggestions as to what we should call her?”

Kirk's head jerked up, his mouth hanging open. “I...” There was pause and Kirk looked back at the tablet. Then he smiled as he returned his gaze to Spock. “I've always liked Hannah.”

Reaching out an arm Spock took the tablet from Kirk and placed it on the table. He then gestured for Kirk to come closer. Kirk moved to sit beside Spock who moved to sit between Kirk’s legs, leaning his back into the broad chest.

“That sound very nice, James,” he whispered. He gave a sigh as Kirk wrapped his arms around him and pressed warm lips to his ear.

“Does it? Good.” There was a soft wetness as Kirk ran a tongue up his ear. Spock shuddered. He felt the belt of his robe being undone. The hands around his were now moving under the cloth and caressing his skin.

He hummed with approval as he writhed gently against Kirk. “James what are you doing?” He moaned as Kirk’s hand moved up his chest and started rubbing at a nipple. It didn't take long for it to harden. Kirk squeezed the nub between a forefinger and thumb.

“I just want to touch you,” Kirk said. “It's been so long and I wanna make up for lost time.” His other hand came up, taking Spock's other nipple in his fingers. Spock moaned as they were rolled, pinched and pulled.

In his own hands he gripped the bedsheets as he panted. “James, please those are quite sensitive.” Spock felt teeth on his ear and stubble on the side of his face.

“Oh? Then I guess I shouldn't play with them both at the same time,” Kirk cooed as he moved down the Vulcan’s body. He rested his hands on Spock’s distended belly, giving it a soft pat. “What do with this other hand?” he muttered. His mouth was on Spock's neck leaving kisses and tiny bites. That coupled with the attention being paid to his nipple, Spock began feeling light headed and weak. Between his own legs he could feel himself growing hard. The hand on his stomach moved and cradled its girth.

“Where should I put my other hand Spock?” Kirk purred. “Tell me so that Daddy can make you feel good.”

Air caught in Spock's throat and for a moment he thought he would faint. What he had started for amusement had backfired on him. Kirk's breath touched his skin wet from kisses and bite marks, and it drove Spock wild. He was fully hard now then head of his penis rubbing the bottom of his belly. “Please touch my cock,” he moaned out.

Kirk's hand moved into the patch of hair right above Spock's penis. “Please What?” he prompted.

“Daddy?” Spock tried and was rewarded with thick fingers wrapped around his shaft.

After all this time Kirk had not forgotten how to touch him and Spock shut his eyes, wallowing in the feel of Kirk stroking him. The hand on his nipple was suddenly under his chin as Kirk turned his face to his. Spock stared into Kirk's flushed countenance with his pupils blown and felt that he could melt.

“Feel good?” Kirk asked and Spock could only nod. The strokes increased making him groan which was swallowed when Kirk kissed him hard. Spock opened his mouth and Kirk wasted no time pushing his tongue in, sliding it across Spock's own, making both men moan.

It all left Spock breathless and warm. His body was winding tighter together, his muscles so tense. The kiss ended as Kirk pulled back, a trail of saliva running from his lips.

He stared at Spock, grinning wildly. “Oh Spock, you're so fucking hot. Gods, I want you so badly. I've missed having you in my bed. I swear I'm never letting you go again. Daddy is going to treat you so good. What ever you and little Hannah want, it's yours baby. Just say it.”

Kirk's lustful babbling filled Spock's head. Carefully, he lowered his shields and was overwhelmed with a passionate possessive adoration for him. It was too much all at once and he came crying out Kirk's name. Semen splashed up and onto  his body. It touched his skin hot yet  Spock could feel it cooling fast. It had been over too soon but warm hands held him as he went blissfully limp.


	14. Chapter 14

The house was different now that it was dark and empty. It reminded Kirk of a haunted house he went in as a child, except cleaner and there was little chance that someone would jump out at him screaming. Even though there was a part of him that wonder if it wouldn't happen.

He had left Spock sprawled out on the bed after the Vulcan had asked him to find him something to eat. Kirk had balked at the idea of fetching food, but Spock had looked at him, his eyes wide, face flushed, lower lip just barely sticking out, and whispered: “Please daddy. The baby's hungry.”

He was in big trouble, because that was all it took. He had been left dumbstruck, nodding his head and scrambling to get out of the bed, while Spock had told him that he wanted le-sumalik'thas and korsau'cir-cen, whatever those were.

He found the kitchen and gave a low whistle as he took in its size. Like everything else it was huge. A thought stuck Kirk as be moved over to a replicator set in the far wall. Spock didn't seem to have any siblings. So did all this wealth go to him when his father passed? Kirk paused as he thought about retiring here. Sure the heat was awful, but who cared when you were rich enough to water gardens the size of small home and have ice brought to house every day. The greedy part of his mind patted him on the back for winning Spock back. Not only was he getting his first officer and lover back, he was getting a little trust fund trixie to boot. He grinned in the darkness.

“Captain? Is there something you needed?”

Kirk spun round and tried to not look guilty as he faced Sarek. The Vulcan peered at him as he flipped on a light. His brown eyes studied Kirk and Kirk wondered if he could read his mind. He really hoped that wasn't the case. After tonight’s event he didn't think Sarek would take kindly to Kirk's previous train of thought.

“Evening,” Kirk said, trying to smile. “I was just getting something for Spock.”

Sarek gave a nod as he stepped forward. “That is kind of you. I will assume that you and my son have made arrangements?” He raised an eyebrow in question.

“Yes. He's coming back to the ship with me.”

“Is that all?” Sarek asked.

“It's enough for now,” Kirk answered.

Sarek gave a nod of his head. “What will you do with the baby?”

“You mean Hannah?” Kirk supplied.

A look of surprise passed Sarek's features. They settled into something not quite a smile. “That is a lovely name.” There was a pause and then, “Tell me Captain, do you love my son, ?”

Kirk stood there uncertain how to answer that. His mind poured through a million suspicions as to why Sarek would ask that, but it occurred to him that maybe, just maybe, the ambassador was making sure that his son end up with someone that actually cared.

He licked his lips and gave a shrug. He found the best why to answer this was honestly as possible. He licked his lips and gave a shrug. “I don't know. I just know that I want him and I'm not giving him up for anything. Ever.”

Sarek gave another nod. “I see. Well then Captain, I do not want to keep you since I am certain that Spock is wondering where his snack is. Allow me to help you with the replicator.”

“I think I know how to use a replicator,” Kirk said making a face.

Sarek gave him another not-quite-a-smile. “I do not doubt it. What I do doubt is your ability to understand Vulcan.”

Kirk turned to look at the replicator and sure enough it was covered in lines, dots and circles. He turned back to Sarek, an embarrassed grin on his face. “Yeah,” he said.

Sarek stepped past him. The Vulcan's hand hovered over the buttons and he turned an expectant eye on Kirk. “What was it my son wanted?”

“Oh. Um, le-sumalik'thas and korsau'cir-cen,” Kirk said his tongue twisting around the words uncertainly. “What are those?”

Sarek lowered his hand and faced Kirk. “They are fairly new Vulcan dishes but popular ones. Le-sumalik'thas is a dessert made with frozen Selet milk that has been sweetened and flavored with fruit, while korsau'cir-cen is a type cactus, similar to the Terran cucumber once the spines have been removed, preserved in brine. Captain, are you alright?”

Kirk shoved his fist his mouth and bit down on it to stop laughing. Sarek stared at him the eyebrow raised again. “I'm fine,” Kirk said after he felt he could safely remove his fist and speak without falling into a fit of giggling. “I was just reminded of an old joke, that's all.” He smiled at Sarek, who appeared to be baffled as he turned back to the replicator. He hit several buttons and handed to Kirk the two bowls of food that it produced.

"You will find utensils in a drawer over there," Sarek intoned giving Kirk a looked that implied he was not amused with the captain making jokes.

Kirk smiled muttered out words of thanks before turning toward the drawer in question. Once loaded with food and a set of fancy looking chopsticks because Vulcans didn't seem to know what a fork was for, Kirk moved towards the exit.

"Oh Captain, One more thing." The Sound of Sarek's voice halted Kirk mid step. He was certain that the ambassador would tell him to hop right back on his ship and leave. That Spock would be staying on Vulcan.

Kirk turned back around and faced Sarek expecting a placid glower that all Vulcans master by the age of three, but instead Sarek looked like man trying to contain his excitement. Kirk thought he could almost see the same little ticks around the mouth that T'Pring gave. He waited for Sarek to say something else.

"You will indulge an old man and send me a generous amount of holos of my grandchild?" Sarek asked.

With this question out Kirk smiled openly. "I assure you, that you won't be able to move for the amount of images we will take of that child."

With one last smile Kirk turned and left, barely hearing the whispered thank you from Sarek.

His trip back to Spock’s rooms proved to be a thoughtful one. Since he was no longer trying to fight Spock, the pregnancy, the idea that his world was changing, Kirk now found he was excited for change. In fact he was impatient for it to happen. He couldn't wait to get back on the ship, to help Scotty finish the nursery, to pick out paints and buy clothes, to ask Spock how things were and hear those words: "We are fine."

Kirk let his mind wander farther along and saw what he hoped that his new life would entail. Quiet nights of filing paper work on his sofa in his refitted quarters. On the floor Hannah wouold be playing. She would ask questions of her fathers about upcoming trips to vacations planets, places with family- friendly beaches and amusement parks. Next to him Spock would sit demurely reading lab reports softly smiling to himself in that subtle way of his before seeing the time and sending Hannah off to bed. As she would slump off protesting that she wasn't tired, Spock would lean into Kirk whispering to him,"Perhaps we should retire to bed as well." Kirk could see the playful expression on Spock's face and tell him, "But I'm not tired," and be told in return, "Neither am I, Daddy."

Kirk shut his eyes, taking a deep breath as he replayed that image in his head. The thought was almost perfect though the second time around he changed it so Spock was once again pregnant, wearing his modified uniform. It made that last part so much sweeter and there in the darkened halls of Spock's ancestral home Kirk giggled, drawing the attention of several guards and their raised eyebrows.

Giving a cough Kirk smiled and continued on his way. He wondered what Spock was doing. Had he cleaned himself up after their lovemaking? Had he refastened his robe and was now sitting in his bed like a man waiting for a late night snack before bed? Or would he be where Kirk left him, mewling and desperate to be touched again? Kirk came to a dead stop in the hall and the surrounding guards watched as he shivered and grinned before he started down the hall again, this time a little faster than before.

~*~

Spock yawned and stretched as he exited the bathroom. He had been loathe to get up after Kirk left but the feel of his own semen cooling on his skin was not pleasant. He had shuffled into the bath cleaning himself off and now returned to his bed to await his captain. The events of the last few moments played in his mind and Spock wasn't surprised.

He would only be fooling himself he tried to say he didn't miss Kirk and his attentions, so when the man had used his favorite tool of sex on him, Spock had given in willingly. He crawled in the bed settling back on the pillows a tiny smile on his face. He was going home, back to the ship, back with his captain. James wanted to raise the baby with him. It was almost too good to be true, but he knew that James was sincere even before he had dropped his shields.

It had been the way Kirk looked at him, touched him and spoke to him that convinced Spock. The fact that the man had said he was wrong was enough, since James Kirk was never wrong about anything, ever. Then there was the name. Spock had not been expecting that, but Kirk had come out with it like it had been on his mind for ages. Hannah...

It was a completely human name for sure and Spock knew that Kirk would insist that the child be raised as a human to help her fit in the Earth dominated Empire, but Spock was okay with that. As long as he was allowed to teach her about Vulcan and it's people which he knew James wouldn't object to. Or least he knew that the captain wouldn't object to it once Spock curled in his lap, appealed to the man’s ego and called him ‘Daddy’ a few times.

 _Daddy_... That word was going to a powerful tool. Unfortunately it was a word that could be used against them both. Oh well.

As he sat in the bed, he peered around the room noting the darkened corners. Something seemed off but he couldn't figure out what. A sudden shiver went down his spine and the baby gave a hard kick.

He had left his robe open, figuring that he could maybe entice James when the man returned but now he pulled it around him tightly. Looking around again, he realized that he was shivering. The doors to the gardens were open and the air did get chilly at night, but Spock knew that this wasn't from the cold.

_Perhaps I should go find James..._

He started to moved out the bed when a rope caught him around the neck. He grasped at it with both hands as it pulled him back against the headboard but it moved around his wrists tying them in place. He tried to cry out but barely managed a choking gasp. He struggled with the rope but it couldn't be loosened.

A sinister laugh gave him pause.

Solkath came out from behind the bed and strode out in front of Spock, smiling as he crawled on top of him.

"So Spock, where is your human now?" He raised his fist, striking Spock hard across the face. Spock’s head smacked into the headboard. The force of it left him dizzy. Solkath grinned down at him, grabbing a fistful of Spock’s hair to hold his head steady. Another fist rained down on Spock’s face but this time there was no pause. Solkath's arm moved like a piston, hitting Spock again and again.

Spock fought to give another cry out but his constricted throat gave a strangled noise which made Solkath laugh some more. Spock fought to kick him off but his legs were pinned under Solkath's weight.

Above him Solkath smiled down at Spock. "You know you should have just accepted what was happening and not fought me. If you had done that, your captain would have left us alone in the gardens and our bonding would still be happening. Now I have been cast from your father's home and made a fool of by that human, with the prospect of inhabiting your lands and titles gone. Well, Spock, I will show you and that human what it's like to have something stripped from you. Let's see how quickly he comes to you aid once I'm finished with you."

Suddenly Solkath's weight was gone and Spock found his legs being pushed open. Once more he kicked our and tried to fight, but the appearance of a knife pressed against his neck forced him to be still.

"Do not move or fight me, or you will no longer have to worry about having your child. I'll cut it out of you and leave you both for dead. Understood?" Solkath's voice was horribly calm as he spoke. Spock shut his eyes and nodded. He heard cloth rustle and felt weight press into him. He focused his breathing and started to pushed himself into a trance. A hand came around slapping his already beaten face.

"Oh no. You stay right here with me. I want you to experience every moment of this so when it's done you can tell your captain and your father how you writhed like a whore." There was a pause and Solkath added, "Who knows, you might like it. After all you did fuck that human more than once, shamelessly twisting around with that crotch dumpling in your belly. Dishonoring your family because you wanted to stay in his bed. You are the most disgraceful of creatures, so you'll probably have a grand time with me."

As he was breached, Spock stifled a cry and called onto his training. Every member of the Fleet was trained for things like this, just in case, but somehow this was worse. In training you knew what to expect, lube was used and though it was awful, you could shake it off. This was something out of a nightmare as Solkath's grunts filled his ears and Spock knew that this was only the start.


	15. Chapter 15

"Spock! Sorry I took so long but your father was in the kitchen and we got to talking and...FUCK!" The bowls in Kirk's hands crashed to the floor one breaking as they spilled their contents. The room smelled like blood and as Kirk rushed to the bed it was no wonder.

There was blood everywhere, the bright green color an affront to the horribleness of the situation. Reaching the bed Kirk stared in horror at what he found. The beaten, bloody, bruised mess that was bound to the headboard had to be Spock though everything in Kirk mind screamed that there was no way. Spock's face didn't look like green tinted meat. Spock's hair was always so neat, never matted down with blood like this. Spock's fingers were never twisted and gnarled nor did he wear torn and bloody clothes. The inside of his thighs did not hold bruises and he didn't sport long jagged cuts down his arms. Spock was never this still.

"Spock?" Kirk's voice was quiet and hesitant. On the bed there was a knife. He picked it up and started cutting the rope that held Spock's head and arms. As they came loose the arms flopped down on the bed lifeless, the head lolled to one side. Kirk pulled the remains of the rope away then touched Spock's neck checking for a pulse. There was one, but faint.

"Hang in there Spock," Kirk breathed. He ran to the doors of the bedroom and started screaming for McCoy, for the guards, for Sarek, for anyone at all. He carried on until he heard shouted replies from afar. He turned back to the bed, slipping on the mess in the floor, but managed to stay upright.

Kirk took Spock’s swollen face in his hands, holding it gingerly. "Spock. Hey Spock can you hear me? Stay with me okay? You'll be okay just stay with me."

One brown eye opened slowly and rolled around before settling on Kirk's face. "James..." The sound of Spock's voice was like gravel, rough and broken. It touched Kirk's hearing like a sandblaster on a butterfly's wing. Kirk's legs gave out sending him to his knees. He didn't let go of Spock's face and even as he fell he was so careful of the bloody mess in his fingers.

"Hey baby," Kirk whispered. He watched as Spock shifted on the bed. "Hey no, don't move. Just stay still. Help's coming. McCoy will look you over and you'll be okay." Kirk let go of Spock's face and took up one of his hands, being mindful of the cuts and rope burn.

"You'll be okay," Kirk repeated. Spock' one good eye watched him and Kirk could see tears forming. Spock didn't cry. Spock was the reason other people cried but Spock never ever shed a tear. Kirk repeated this his in his head as he started to shake. Tears were falling down his face and he sucked on his lips to keep from sobbing.

"James, I...” Spock breathed.

Kirk tightened his grip on Spock's hand. "It's fine Spock. Don't worry, everything will be fine and as soon as you're patched up we'll go home and you can rest in your own bed and when you're able we'll start decorating the nursery, okay?"

Spock blinked. "Nursery?" he mumbled.

Kirk nodded uncertainly. "Yeah, you know? For Hannah? "

"Hannah... The baby..." Spock started and then trailed off as he gave a choked cry. His tears rolled down and Kirk's heart broke as Spock sobbed openly.

"James ─ There is something wrong. I cannot feel the baby."

At that moment Kirk felt his world shatter. The room around him started to fill with people rushing in and suddenly there was McCoy pulling him away from Spock's side. As he was lead away from Spock's bed, Kirk became aware of a hole opening and swallowing him up. A blackness overtook him as he realized that things were changing once more. Someone was talking to him, but all he could hear was a buzzing in his ears. Everything seemed dim and fractured, like a mirror broken and long forgotten. His world had changed again and he tried fought off the reality of the situation, it was too late.

In one long moment Kirk fell to the floor letting the blackness devour him whole.


	16. Chapter 16

“Here. Drink this.”

A glass was forced into his hand and Kirk stared at it numbly. He was on the floor outside Spock's room, propped against the wall, his legs spread out in front of him. He wasn't sure how he got there.

Two blue eyes studied him as McCoy squatted down. The doctor gestured with a nicotine stained finger that Kirk need to raise the glass up to his lips. The liquid was clear and tasted of cinnamon as he drank. It burned the back of his throat and warmed his body. Wincing he handed the glass back to McCoy. He made an effort to stand, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. “What was that?”

“Some kind of Vulcan schnapps. I figured you could use a drink. You alright?” McCoy asked as he stood, giving Kirk room to get to his feet.

Kirk placed one hand on a nearby wall to steady himself. He peered hard at the doctor. “Depends. Is Spock alright?”

McCoy eyes moved to one side and he chewed on his bottom lip. “Well.”

Kirk felt a pit open up inside him. “Is he?” he asked.

McCoy held his gaze and finally nodded.

“He will be after some rest and some treatment. Right now he's stable and upright. Luckily I had some equipment here and Sarek called for some healers. Together we've patched him up. The worst of the bruising has been dealt with though he's still discolored in places. The minor cuts we closed up and for the more severe wounds I gave him stitches. He just needs to rest now.”

There was something in McCoy's voice that bothered Kirk. Or maybe it was his words. He pushed off the wall, swaying a little as he did so. He was tired and yet full of energy as his stomach roiled.

“Okay. We’ll get him to the ship tomorrow and we'll go from there. I'll contact Mr. Farrell have him get things ready and--”

“Jim, there something else.” McCoy's voice cut through Kirk's words, making him pause. All at once the hall they were standing him seemed darker than before and held less air. Kirk waited wordlessly for McCoy speak again. He seemed to reluctant to do so.

“Bones, just spit it out cause right I do not have the patience to deal with your nonsense,” Kirk said. He watched as McCoy rubbed at the nape of his neck his eye turned downward.

“Bones?” Kirk was suddenly aware of the hall closing in on him and he crossed his arms over his chest. McCoy's bloodshot, glassy eyes darted around Kirk’s face.

“It's about the baby,” McCoy started.

Kirk started his breath caught in his chest. He drew his arms in tighter around him and he forced himself to breathe. “You mean Hannah?” His voice came out weak and shaking.

McCoy blinked at him in surprise.

“Spock and I had come to an arrangement and we picked a name for the baby,” Kirk supplied. McCoy gave a little nod, a solemn expression on his features.

“I like that name,” McCoy said.

“It's a good one,” Kirk added, his tone tinged with desperation. The sound of it made McCoy wince and frown. He licked his lips seemingly at a loss as to what to say next.

Silently Kirk waited for the doctor to speak.

“It would have been a great name,” McCoy finally said and the implication in those words went through Kirk like a knife. He swayed on his feet his hand going back to the wall to steady himself.

“Bones....” Kirk pleaded.

McCoy shook his head. “I'm sorry, Jim We tried.”

“Don't tell me that,” Kirk hissed rushing the doctor and throwing him into the near-by. His fingers curled into McCoy's shirt and his snarled at him. “Don't lie to me. You let her die, didn't you?”

McCoy's blue eye stared at Kirk, filled with sorrow. “You know that's not true. Jim listen me.” Slowly, Kirk let go of McCoy and stepped back his face starting to crumble. McCoy looked down, blinking back tears. “We tired. The healers and I, we tried everything, but Solkath did a number on Spock and in the end the baby was already gone before we got there.”

Kirk leaned against the wall and took in what McCoy told him. “Solkath?” he asked through clenched teeth. “ Solkath did this?”

“That's what Spock told us. Sarek has been informed and he's got people out looking him.”

“ Solkath,” Kirk repeated spitting the name like a curse. He pushed off the wall and took a deep breath. “At this moment Spock is alright, correct?”

“Yes.” McCoy eyed Kirk warily.

Kirk gave a terse nod. “Is there anything I need to do or know right now?”

“Not really except that Sarek wants Spock to stay down here for a few more days. He said that Spock will need to go into a healing trance for a bit and he would rather his son be here.”

“Fine. I will tell Mr. Farrell come down here with some men and we'll set up a guard around Spock's room. Bones do me a favor? Don't let Spock go into that trance yet.”

“What? Why not?” McCoy shouted. From behind Spock's door a serious looking Vulcan in gray robes leaned out into the hall. He lifted a finger his lips, giving both men a dirty look. Once his had disappeared back behind the door again Kirk spoke in a hushed tone.

“Don't ask why. Just do it.”

“Jim, listen to me. Spock needs to rest and heal,” McCoy hissed leaning in close to Kirk.

“You're right he does, but there is something else he needs right now and I'm going to get it for him.” Kirk pushed past McCoy and started down the hall.

“Where are you going?” McCoy shrieked after Kirk as he followed on his heels.

Without stopping or even looking over his shoulder Kirk replied, “To the ship. Don't worry I’ll only be gone two days tops and I’ll send Mr. Farrell down immediately. Just look after Spock okay?”

McCoy stopped running after his Captain, out of breath. He sighed. “Fine,” he called. “But I'm only giving you one day and you're an asshole for leaving right now.”

Kirk stopped at this. “I know I am, Bones. Just take care of him. Please?”

He didn't wait for McCoy to answer but continued on his way. In his wake the doctor swore to himself and turned back toward Spock's room.


	17. Chapter 17

There was the smell of copper in the air. He blinked against the bright lights around him and hissed. He had no idea where he was, how he had gotten there. He tried to sit up but found he was strapped to a table naked. He struggled against the bonds holding him in place and heard a laugh. He stopped moving and blinking again against the harsh lights.

“Who is there? What is the meaning of this?” Solkath hissed.

There was another laugh and he turned his head toward the sound of it. Captain Kirk was leaning against a far wall, dressed in a gold vest and black pants. The human pushed off the wall smiling, his tall boots making a dull thud on the floor as he walked. Kirk moved towards the table and stared down at Solkath.

“Captain Kirk,” Solkath said carefully, staring up at the human.

“Solkath. You're awake. Excellent. Now we can get started.” Kirk grinned wildly and stepped away from the table for a moment. He came back pushing a medical cart. Solkath could not see what was on it.

“What is the meaning of this, Captain?” he asked once more struggling with his bonds.

Kirk leaned over him his forehead wrinkled in mock confusion. “You mean you don't remember? What you did? Tisk tisk, shame on you.”

Solkath's mouth ran dry. “Captain, you have nothing in this,” he shouted, his voice cracking in desperation. “It was a matter of pride and something needed to be settled between my clan and Sarek's. You have no right.”

“Shut up,” Kirk commanded and Solkath closed his mouth quickly, noting the mad look in the human's eyes. Kirk's hand reached over to the cart and lifted up a pair of red handled pruning shears. The blades gleamed in the light and Solkath felt his blood drain away.

“I have no right? Is that so?” Kirk said softly. He looked over the tool in his hand smiling at it. He turned his attention back to Solkath. Under that mad gaze Solkath tried to shrink away but it was a futile effort.

“Captain, if I may be allowed to explain--”

“I thought I told you to shut. up.” Kirk hadn't raised his voice. That was what made the sound of it so terrible. He spoke in soft conversational tones and Solkath shivered at each syllable.

Solkath watched as Kirk moved around the table stopping at the end where his feet were bound. With his free hand he tapped on Solkath’s large toe.

Kirk said in a hushed manner: “No right? See you're wrong there. I have every, every right. Spock is my first officer and I don't like people messing with my officers. Spock is my lover. I really don't like people fucking with my lovers. Overall Spock is MINE and I hate for anyone to touch what is mine!”

He grabbed Solkath's ankle and brought the pruning shears around, clamping onto the smallest toe. There was a sickening sound as the tool cut through flesh and bone. The toe fell to the floor as Solkath screamed, green blood spilling over him and Kirk. For his part Kirk looked unfazed. He looked down at the wound and then back at Solkath who was gasping in pain.

“And that's just Spock. You also took our little Hannah from us. Our poor tiny baby girl, who I will never get to hold, or teach how to say dada, or go to her dance recitals...” Kirk trailed off turning his head away. There was a soft sound, a labored intake of breath. When Kirk looked back at Solkath the human’s eyes were filled with tears.

Calmly he wiped them away, before clamping down on the ankle again and cutting off another toe. Solkath shouted and begged for mercy.

Kirk only gazed serenely at him, his lips pulled into a tight thin line. The hard brown irises were extremely bloodshot.

“You said that I was bloodthirsty and mad,” Kirk told him. “Well, I don't know about that. I like to be efficient. I like to get the job done and sometime what it takes to get the job done isn't pleasant, but such is life. Now, Sarek has men out looking for you and while I like and respect the ambassador, I don't feel that his men will get the job done right.” Kirk paused looking at the bloody pruners one more time and he smiled as he met Solkath’s eyes.

“But,” Kirk continued on, “I will get the job done and don't think that I'm just going to let you sit through this passively. Oh no. I have I what I need to draw this out for however long I want and to see that you stay with me the whole time. I want you to experience every moment of this, so when I return to Spock I can describe to him the look on your face when I cut out your heart.”

The pruners moved and one more toe was removed. As Solkath cried and wailed, Kirk grinned, his laughter mixing with the cries of torment. Together the sounds echoed throughout the Enterprise.

~*~

“Doctor I must protest. Spock needs to go into a healing trance,” Sarek's voice boomed. In Spock's bedroom everyone stopped and stared.

“Sa-mekh,” Spock called from his place in bed.

Sarek turned from the red-faced doctor to his son. “What is it Spock? What do you need?”

Spock's discolored face turn up to his father. “Please leave Dr. McCoy be. I'm sure he has good reasons for not wanting me in a trance yet. Allow him to do his job.”

At his son's words Sarek's shoulders slumped, but he raised a hand, petting Spock's hair. “As you wish, my child. I have matters I must attend to, but I will return before evening meal.”

Sarek turned from Spock back to McCoy, his eyes narrowed. “I am trusting you Doctor,” he said.

McCoy nodded. “I understand Mr. Ambassador. I'll stay right here with Spock and see that he is well taken care of.”

“Excellent.” With one last look at his son, Sarek exited the room.

In his absence McCoy blew out a sigh of relief.

“Doctor?” Spock intoned.

McCoy moved toward the bed and tried to smile. “Yes, Spock?” He answered, his voice sounding much merrier than he looked.

Spock regarded him and then with a sigh he dropped down further into the bed. “Why I am not allowed to fall into my trance?” Spock sounded exhausted. McCoy silently cursed Kirk for putting him this position.

“Honestly, it’s because the captain asked me not to,” the doctor said.

Spock blinked, a frown pulling on his mouth. “I see, and where is James?”

McCoy shrugged his shoulders helplessly. “I don't know. He said he was going to the ship.”

Spock frowned some more and turned to Mr. Farrell who was sitting in a chair at the foot his bed. “Do you know where the Captain is?” Spock asked.

The large man shook his head. “No sir.”

“I assure you he is coming back,” McCoy blurted out. Spock looked up at him and his expression told McCoy that the thought hadn't even crossed his mind ─ until now. McCoy kicked himself as he smiled down at his patient.

“Maybe you should get some sleep,” McCoy added. “I'm sure you'll feel better for some rest and The Captain should be back by then.”

Spock shot him a withering look. “Do not patronize me, Doctor.

“Hey. I'm trying to be nice here, dammit,” McCoy shouted and Spock winced. The action shocked McCoy. He let out a long sigh. “Just rest, Spock and we'll go from there, alright?”

Spock gave a sullen nod. He started to shuffle further under his covers when the doors to his bedroom opened and in stepped his captain. Kirk was dressed in a simple white button up shirt and jeans, his hands clasped behind his back.

As he approached the bed, his foot steps slowed and unfamiliar look of uncertainty clouded his features. “Is the patient allowed visitors?” Kirk addressed McCoy but he kept his eyes trained on Spock, a tiny smile on his lips. McCoy gave Spock a questioning look.

“I will be fine, Doctor,” Spock said.

McCoy gave a resigned nod. “Just don't wear him out or upset him,” he muttered as he started toward the doors.

Kirk watched the man leave and then turn his attention to Mr. Farrell. “You would mind leaving us as well?” The big man held up an understanding hand and lumbered off after McCoy. Kirk moved closer toward the bed, his full attention on Spock once more. The bed dipped under his weight as he sat on the edge at Spock's feet. His hands moved to his lap and Spock saw they held a tiny white box. “How are you?” Kirk asked.

“I would like to say that I am fine, but I think we both know that would be a lie,” Spock said.

“I'm sorry Spock,” Kirk muttered.

Blinking, Spock sat up a little and frowned. “Whatever for? You did not do this.”

Kirk shook his head. For a several seconds he stared down at the floor. Then with a sigh he moved closer to where Spock sat. The tiny white box was set aside as Kirk took one of Spock's hands in his own. “I didn't do this but if hadn't been so stubborn, all this could have been avoided.”

Spock shook his head. “Perhaps, but why waste time with speculations. Besides I never expected you to marry me. I just wanted you accept it.”

“Really?” Kirk asked.

Spock shrank a little. “Yes. As I told you from before I just wanted you do know and be okay with it. Do you still doubt me?”

Kirk peered into Spock bruised face taking in the Vulcan’s hurt expression. He shook his head furiously. “No. I don't and I'm sorry I did, but you're right. We shouldn't waste time dwelling on the past.” He brought Spock's hand to his lip and kissed it gently before giving the Vulcan his best smile.

“I brought you a present,” he added, setting Spock's hand down and handing him the box.

Spock took it and noted its weight. He stared at it before carefully slipping off the lid.

Inside, a green tinted heart lay at the bottom of the box.

“Is this?” Spock started.

Kirk nodded. “It is. Took me a whole day to track the bastard but I used the ships resources and had him beamed into the brig. I made sure he knew why he was there.” As Kirk talked Spock looked back inside the box, unsure of what he was feeling at that moment.

“Did he suffer?” He once again turn his attention to Kirk.

Kirk’s expression grew serious. “Horribly,” he said.

“Tell me,” Spock whispered. His voice was soft yet unyielding and Kirk smiled. He took up one of Spock's hands again.

“By the time I was done, he was hoarse from screaming. Of course he could no longer make words since I removed his tongue. Before I did, he cried and begged and pleaded. I removed all ten of his toes and fingers. I used scalpels to peel tiny pieces of skin off his body. I used hammers and broke bones. And in the end I cut away the skin from his chest, sawed through his ribs one by one, and cut out his heart. Only fair, right?”

Spock nodded wide eyed. Kirk reached up with his free hand and stroked Spock's hair. “You should have seen his face,” Kirk added. “Right before he died he looked so confused and horrified, like he couldn't believe it. I had warned him, though. “

“How kind of you,” Spock breathed.

Kirk nodded. “I thought so. So, do you like your gift?”

Spock nodded several times as a tear ran down his face. “I love it. Thank you, James.”

“You're are more than welcome,” Kirk said, wiping away Spock's tears with his thumb. His hand cupped Spock cheek and Spock rested his head on it gently he pressed one of his own hand over top of it. They sat in silence like that for some time. Then reluctantly Spock pulled back and sighed.

“I should get some rest now,” Spock replied.

“Yes, you should. Why don't you go ahead and go into your trance. McCoy and I will stick around and wait for your to wake up. Then when you’re ready we’ll go back to the ship.”

“James, I don't think...”

Kirk held up a hand to stop him. “It's fine. I'll talk to McCoy about keeping you on light duty or something and whatever else you made need cause I don't know, but we can figure it out together.”

Spock blinked, surprised at Kirk's gentleness.

This was not lost on Kirk. He leaned in, lightly kissing Spock cheek. “I told you. I'm going to keep you with me, so don't think I'm going anywhere or that you are no longer wanted by my side.” He stood, beaming down at Spock, who stared up him, wide eyed. “Now rest. I'm going yell at McCoy and I will see you when you up in a few days.” Kirk's hand brushed through Spock hair one last time before he turned and exited the room.

Spock watched him go, dumbfounded. That is until his hand fell on the box and Spock felt a surge of vindication.

“Excuse me,” he called out to one of the healers in the room. It was a young apprentice that had been chosen by the others to stand by ready for when Spock was prepared to go into his trace, in case he would need the assistance. The joke was on the apprentice since Spock knew well how to use the trance and the other healers wanted an excuse to wander the gardens.

The young Vulcan moved closer, his young face radiating a good-naturedness that Spock smiled at. “Yes, my Lord,” he said softly.

Spock handed him the box. The apprentice gazed down into it and the look his face told Spock that he wished that he hadn't.

“You would be so good and give this to my father,” Spock said. “Let him know that Captain Kirk has gifted this to our family in our time of mourning.”

The apprentice swallowed and gave a nod, but said, “Are you certain that your father would wish to see this?”

“Oh yes. I am very certain. Now run along. I need my rest.”

The apprentice peered into the box on last time before he scurried out the room. When the door shut behind him Spock peered around him uncertainly. The room was empty now save for him and despite the bright lights and the thick comforting blankets covering him, Spock felt fear creeping into him.

He shut his eyes only to open them again when he heard Solkath's voice in his ear. He looked down at his arms cut up and bruised and suddenly felt so weak. With sharp intake of breath, he bit back a sob and climbed out of his bed. As his feet hit the floor he shivered uncontrollably. His breath was coming faster and he fought the sudden urge to run.

“Spock?”

Spock jumped and turned.

Kirk headed towards him. The humans face was marred with concern as he reached out a hand. “Spock what are you doing getting out of bed?”

Spock waded through his now jumbled mind to find an answer to give. In the end he gave up and hung his head, whimpering.

“Oh, Spock, come on. Let's get you back into bed,” Kirk said.

Kirk’s hand landed on Spock’s shoulder. He flinched at the contact. There was a muffled curse and Spock waited for Kirk to storm off out of the room, ranting about idiot Vulcans and how much trouble they were.

It came as a shock when Kirk knelt down in front of him and spoke to him softly.

“Spock. Look at me.”

Spock did.

“Good. Now stay focused on me and breath with me. In. Out. In. Out. Good.”

Spock followed Kirk’s breathing until slowly the shivering stopped. Once more Kirk reached out a hand. This time Spock did not move away. Kirk stroked Spock’s hair gently, before moving back to his shoulder.

“You wanna get back into bed Spock?”

The sudden thought of being in his bed again terrified Spock. He shook his head violently.

Kirk pursed his lips and nodded. “Okay. You wanna come with me to my room?”

That idea sounded wonderful. “Yes,” he breathed. He felt his panic wash away when Kirk stood and took one of his hands. He stood but didn't move. Kirk tugged on him gently.

“James, thank you for being so kind ─ I...” he trailed off.

Kirk shook his head. “Don't thank me. I'm working for completely selfish reasons.”

Which are?” Spock asked, drawing back.

Kirk pulled him closer and whispered in his ear. “I want you to be okay, so when you're ready, you'll marry me.” Then before he could question it, Spock's arm was tugged. He didn't fight it this time, but followed his captain to his guest room.

Later, in Kirk's bed, curled into his captain’s side, Spock fell into his trance. After four days, Kirk greeted him with a smile.


	18. Chapter 18

**Epilogue: Two Years Later.**

It was the swearing that woke Spock, but he didn't care since it was James and he swore all the time about everything. It was the loud bang that forced Spock to sit up. More swearing drifted up from the stairs that lead into the bedroom.

“James?” Spock called. A sudden silence drifted up the stairs.

“Spock? You're wake?”

Spock pushed aside the covers and started to get out of the bed. “Yes, James. Do you require assistance?”

“What? No. You are to stay your ass in that bed and that's an order, Mister!”

Spock flopped back against the pillows and huffed, but answered, “Yes, tal-kam.”

He thought he heard a muttered response along the line of, “you better ‘yes tl-kam’ me,” but decided that it was a trick of the cabin's environmental controls. Instead, he pulled the covers back over his legs and stretched still feeling tired despite the amount of sleep he had gotten the night before. With a yawn he ran a hand over his distended stomach and then purred as he felt a tiny kick against his hand.

Twins, Dr. McCoy told him and Kirk. While Spock had been pleased with the news, Kirk had to go have a moment alone ─ with a bottle of brandy. Later when he sobered up and calmed down, Kirk was thrilled. Before Spock knew it he was being carted off to Risa, for a surprise wedding and honeymoon. Not that he was complaining. James had promised that they would marry and at this point he was a good six months along in his pregnancy.

After a couple of minutes Kirk came bounding up the stairs, dressed in a pair of gray shorts, with a loaded tray in his hands.

“Good morning, beautiful,” he declared, setting down the tray on the neighboring nightstand and piling in to the bed next to Spock. He nuzzled a pointed ear, kissing it softly so that Spock purred loudly and with abandon.

“The boys are already awake this morning,” Spock said and Kirk perked up.

“Yeah.” He moved, lowering his head to Spock stomach, placing kisses on its curve. “Hey guys. Good morning,” he said into the dome. He smiled as he ran a hand over the skin.

Spock watched him, his heart swelling in his side as he ran a languid hand through Kirk's hair. “Do you feel them kicking?” Spock asked.

Kirk continued to moved his hand as he nodded. “Sure do. My boys are so strong.”

Spock raised an eyebrow at the “my boys”, but said nothing. Instead, he turned his attention to the tray on the night stand. “Is that breakfast?” He leaned over to see what his husband had brought him. He was starving.

Kirk chuckled and sat up. “Sometimes Spock, you have a one track mind,” he teased. He hefted the tray and placed it into Spock's lap.

Spock glared at him, not at all pleased with the remark. “I do not. I am hungry and I have two extra mouths to feed.” He peered down at the tray and frowned.

“What's wrong?” Kirk asked, seeing Spock expression.

“It would seem that someone has already eaten this, James,” Spock intoned. The plate in front of him indeed look like a pre-chewed mess of eggs, something green and gray, with a side of toast.

“No, it doesn't. It's a mushroom and spinach omelet. I just had some trouble with the omelet part, but it's fine.” Spock continued to frown at his breakfast.

Kirk ordered: “It's fine. Just eat it!”

Spock made a face and Kirk leaned in, taking up the fork off the tray. He loaded it down, then pinched Spock nose shut. In complete surprise Spock gasped and as he did Kirk shoved the forkful of food into his mouth. Outraged, Spock glared at his husband for a moment before he chewed. It actually tasted pretty good and he let go of his anger to make a sound of appreciation.

“See? It wasn't that bad. You wanna another bite?”

Nodding primly, Spock opened his mouth willing. Bite by bite Kirk fed Spock his breakfast, pausing to let Spock purr and pout between bites. By the time he set down the fork on the empty plate Spock noticed the half formed erection underneath kirk's shorts.

“You enjoy that too much,” Spock said.

Shrugging, Kirk picked the tray off Spock's lap, setting it back down on the nightstand. “I like taking care of you. It's fulfilling. You get enough to eat?”

Spock thought about this. “For now,” he purred.

Kirk shook his head smiling. He moved in closer to Spock, burying his face in Spock's neck. “McCoy is going to kill us both when we get back to the ship. He's already bitching at me that you're too heavy,” he murmured, snuggling.

“I thought I was underweight?” Spock huffed.

Kirk placed a kiss on Spock's shoulder, grinning. “Yeah well, it seems I am too good at being a doting husband.” He wrapped one arm around Spock's shoulders while the other sought out one of Spock's hands. He lifted it to his lips kissing it lightly.

“Who would have thought,” Spock said.

Kirk laughed at that. “Yeah. Who? But you know what? I like being the loving husband. Spoiling you ─ Speaking of which, what do you wanna do today? It is after all your first day as Mr. James T. Kirk, so how do you want to celebrate?”

Spock took in the growing smile of Kirk and was aware of the corning of his own mouth curling up ever so slightly. “I do not know, k'diwa. What are my choices?”

Kirk placed another kiss on Spock’s hand. “Well there's shopping, sight seeing, holo-programs... Oh I know.” Suddenly he jumped off the bed and ran over to the window. He pulled the blinds aside revealing a view of white sand and blue waters. He turned back to Spock, his grin even wider. “We should spend the day on the beach.”

Spock hesitated for a second.

Kirk's grin faded. “You don't like that idea?” he inquired.

“It's not that I do not like the idea. I just forgot a swimsuit, so there would be no point,” Spock supplied hurriedly.

“Oh, is that all,” Kirk waved his hand dismissively and went over to the wardrobe in the room. He opened one of the three drawers in it and pulled out a pair of black swim trunks. “I just packed your old ones for you.” Kirk held the trunks out in one hand. Spock opened his mouth, but shut it and sat quietly.

After a moment Kirk dropped his arm sighing. “What is it?”

“Those do not fit me anymore...” Spock said slowly.

Kirk examined the shorts. “Really? The look like they would fit. Here try them on.”

Spock huffed. “James, I know they don't fit. I tried them on before we left. They didn't cover my stomach. They barely went over my hips,” he insisted.

“But they did go over your hips, right? Kirk prompted.

“Yes, they did but that does not count. They do not fit.” Spock crossed his arms over his chest. He was immediately hit with the shorts.

“Bah. If they go over your hips, that means they cover your ass and junk. Therefore they fit. Put 'em on, and I will pack us a cooler with some drinks and sandwich. Then we hit the beach.”

Spock started to protest but Kirk moved back onto the bed pressing a finger to his lips. “I don't want to hear it,” he said. He pulled his finger away and gave Spock a quick peck.

Spock sat on the bed looking mildly defeated. “I just do not think that me wearing these shorts would look very appealing, that's all,” he murmured.

Kirk tilted his head as in thought. “Really? Cause I think that it would be precious.”

Spock stared at Kirk for some time as the man gave him a lopsided little smile. “Precious?” he questioned. He wasn't sure what to make of that. Despite everything that had happened between them Spock had noted that Kirk still liked to mock him from time to time.

“Yeah. I can see it now,” Kirk said his tone light. “You're on the beach enjoying the sun's warmth, your little green tinted toes in the sand and your shorts just barely on your hips, while your very pregnant belly hangs out for all to see.” He smiled affectionately at Spock.

“James!” Spock said, shocked. He sat sullenly as Kirk moved closer to his wrapping arm around him again.

“What? I can't help that I like showing you off,” Kirk whispered into one pointed ear. One hand trailed down Spock's body and rested on his belly as Kirk nuzzled him. Spock shut his eyes and leaned into Kirk a little.

There was a breathy laugh from Kirk. “You are so cute. I love when we go out together and you let me place an arm around your waist, or you link your arm in mine. Do you know how proud I am have you at my side?”

Spock gave a quick shake of his head.

There was another soft laugh. The feel of Kirk's warm breath on his ear made Spock's toes curl. “You don't?” Kirk continued, “You should, the way I can't keep my hands off you. I adore you and the way people look at us. I get to answer their stares with one of my own. You know what that stare says to everyone?”

Spock gave another little shake of head. He turned towards Kirk and curled into his side.

The human’s lips pressed to his hair. “It's says, 'Yes this gorgeously pregnant Vulcan is mine.' Of course now I have the ring on your finger to drive this point home.”

Spock opened his eyes and peered up at the grinning Kirk. “James, please tell me what is like to be so possessively selfish?' He lifted an eyebrow as he spoke.

Kirk feigned being in pain and sighed. “It's awful. Truly awful. A fate that I wouldn't wish on anyone. It causes me pain Spock, but...” He twisted in the bed so that he was on his knees. He placed his hands on Spock's shoulder gently pushing him onto his back. He straddled Spock's hips, his hands framing either side of Spock's face.“....giving what I am in possession of, it's worth it.”

He gave Spock a wicked smiled and kissed his hard on the mouth. Spock returned the kiss with a low moan, shutting his eyes, letting the feel of Kirk mouth on his take over everything else.

“How about we got to the beach later? I seem to have something else on my mind right now,” Kirk whispered as the kiss broke. He took his tongue and traced it along the line of Spock's upper lip. Spock shuddered as he sighed.

His hand lifted up and gripped Kirk's shoulders tightly. “I find that would be agreeable,” he breathed.

Kirk's face lit up, eager and hungry, as he pressed his lips to Spock's once more. The kiss was rough, the heat coming off Kirk pouring into Spock so that he felt like he was burning from the inside. He opened his mouth to gasp and found it soon occupied with Kirk's tongue. He clamped down it and sucked greedily. The moan that came from Kirk flooded Spock's ears making his eyes roll back and shut.

Once more Kirk pulled back leaving Spock breathless. Without taking his eyes off Spock, he crawled off him and stood up. He quickly pulled off his shorts, so that he stood at the edge of the bed nude, exposing his half-formed erection. He leaned over the bed grabbing at Spock's ankles and pulled him to the edge. Spock moved easily over the smooth sheets. He soon found his ass hanging over the edge of the bed, with only Kirk for support.

He shifted uneasily. “James...”

“Shhh. Don't worry baby. Daddy's got you,” Kirk cooed as he pressed his hips into Spock, throwing the Vulcan’s leg over his elbows.

Spock purred in response, rocking his hips. “Mmmmm, James,” he sighed as he became aware of Kirk's cock rubbing against his own. He watched as Kirk took them both in his hand and stroked them slowly. He watched Spock's face as he did so, his gaze intense. The combination of Kirk's stare and his touch made Spock writhe.

“Fuck, you're gorgeous,” Kirk hissed, his hand moving faster over their swelling organs. “Does feel good?”

“Yes, Daddy,” Spock breathed.

The speed of Kirk's hand increased and he sucked in breath through his teeth. “You beautiful fucking bitch. You know just what I wanna hear, don't you?' Kirk said. Spock let out a moan as Kirk gave their cocks a squeeze. His body was wound so tight and he felt so full and empty at the same time that he gave a little cry as once more Kirk changed the speed of his strokes. Suddenly, Kirk let go of his cock ,wrapping his hand fully around Spock. He gave Spock's dick a hard tug making Spock whimper.

“James. Petakov. Wait,” Spock said, squirming.

“Yes,” Kirk replied breathless, captivated by Spock's flushed face. His hand slowed and Spock attempted to catch his breath.

Kirk grinned him mischievously. “You close baby?” he cooed and Spock gave a wordless nod, his mouth slack. “You don't want me to quit, do you?”

Spock shook his head as fast as he could without feeling dizzy. “No. I just want...” he panted.

Kirk squeezed his cock some more and ran his thumbnail over the head. “What? What do you want?” There was another squeeze and Spock bit his lip as let out a stifled groan.

Inhaling deeply, Spock tried to focus on his words. “You inside me.”

Kirk looked at him letting go of his cock as he did so. A tiny smile played on his lips as he ran he fingers over Spock bulging belly. “Is that all? My pleasure.” He moved his arm letting one of Spock's legs drop and leaned carefully over toward the nightstand. His finger locked around the drawer handle and pulled it open finding what he needed right away. Not bothering to shut the drawer kirk righted himself, a bottle of lube in his hand. With one movement he reached down and threw Spock's free leg back over his arm, as he snapped open the lid of the lube.

Spock watched as he poured a large dollop the thick clear gel into his hand and smeared the lube over his cock.

Kirk tossed the bottle on to the bed as he pumped his cock slowly, staring down at the Vulcan. “Look how hard I am for you,” he whispered.

Spock did look. The sight of the engorged member in Kirk's fist, drew a sigh from his lips and his heart speed up at the thought of it penetrating him. He wriggled, moving his hips and ass closer to Kirk.

“Can't wait, uh?” Kirk chuckled giving his cock a few more pumps, before pressing the tip to Spock's entrance. Slowly, he pushed in a little and pulled back out. He repeated the action going in a little deeper this time before once more pulling out. Spock bit his lip and balled his fists into the bedsheets to keep from whining outright.

“We don't wanna rush things now do we?” Kirk asked, his tone mocking Spock's visible desperation. He pushed in some more and with one hand ran his nails over Spock's stomach. In response Spock arched his back, gasping.

“But then again,” Kirk mused. “Your hormones have been all over the place lately, so...” He pushed the head of his cock back inside Spock and with a sharp thrust of his hips he pushed all the way in. This time Spock didn't fight it, but let out a low satisfied groan.

In turn Kirk blew out a breath, his eyes wide. “Oh fuck. I'm not going to last long if you keep that up,” he said. He took his hands lifted Spock's hips up, adjusting his own so that his balls smacked into Spock's buttocks. “I guess I better make it count then.”

His thrusts started with long slow strokes. He made sure to rock up with each thrust and Spock's body responded to feel of his prostate being hit repeatedly. His hands roamed his body, moving down toward his bobbing cock.

“Fuck Spock. That's it. Touch yourself for me,” he hissed increasing his pace. Groaning Spock took his weeping cock in hand and tugged at it as Kirk pounded into him. As they continued, Spock could feel his body growing hot and his breath was coming much too fast. He stroked himself harder, moaning and mewling as he did.

Above him he heard Kirk hiss. “Fuck, I'm gonna come.”

“Yes, James. Come inside me, please,” Spock moaned. There was a groan from Kirk and a jerk in his thrusts. Spock sighed as he felt semen being pumping into his hole. It's felt like liquid fire and Spock longed for its heat to stay with him. It was disappointing then when Kirk pulled out and pushed Spock further back on the bed.

“I'm sorry, “ Kirk said, crawling into the bed next to the Vulcan. “I wanted to last longer for you. Here let me.” He brushed Spock's hand away from his cock and started stroking it hard and fast.

Kirk leaned in close to Spock's face, kissing it all over. “Spock, you're so hot. Come for me. Come on, Baby, come on, come for Daddy,” he whispered between kisses. It all left Spock overwhelmed and breathless, so when he came it was a gasp and a silent cry. His semen splashed over his stomach and as Kirk's hand released his softening cock, it moved up, smearing Spock's come over his skin. Kirk brought his finger up to his lips and licked at them, peering at Spock's face.

“I adore you,” Kirk said. He ran his finger in Spock's hair getting come in the strands, but Spock didn't mind. He shut his eyes letting the man touch him. Love washed over him as he felt his sons move inside him.

“You know what, Spock? Fuck the beach. Let's stay in and do this for the rest of the day. What do you say?”

“I would find that most agreeable,” Spock breathed. He lay still, his eye shut, feeling content as Kirk petted his hair and whispered in his ear.

“You're so beautiful and you're all mine,” Kirk said softly. Those hazel eyes regarded Spock with such affection that it almost didn’t look like the same man.

“Selfish man,” Spock replied.

Kirk smiled. “When it comes to you ─ very. I'm unrepentant about it.”

“Mmmm James,” Spock sighed as he turned over and curled into Kirk chest. He felt those strong arms wrap around him and he started to drift.

Some days it wasn't easy being loved by Kirk, but Spock didn't care. At the end of the day, he too was selfish and it was all worth it to be with his captain. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And that's it! 
> 
> I want to take a moment to give many thanks to my beta, tprillahfiction. She worked with me a lot on this fic and it wouldn't be near as good as it is without her help and input. I really appreciate all that you did.
> 
> Also a million thanks to my artist, spomarani for working with me again this year and making such wonderful pieces for my story. I'm so happy with each one you have no idea.
> 
> Finally, a big thank you to theoddparticle, because he never let's me down and always supports my writing. You are the best.


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